# Don't drive like Satan if you have Christian bumper stickers **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [June 21, 2009, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513 "2009-06-21T22:21:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/21 "2009-06-22T14:22:35Z")
> [@Redwing](#): > > Ya know, I’ve never taken those signs that way. I’ve always seen them as addressed to rescue workers in case there’s an accident. I think that’s how they got their start. But have you ever noticed that people who sported them were usually pretty awful drivers? ---
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/22 "2009-06-22T15:49:05Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > No, it just says you’re a dick. > I’ve always wanted (well, if I had a car) to get a Jesus fish, then a little heart, and a Darwin Fish after it. Just to see how people react. I’ve been looking for this sort of thing for my father in law (he’s a VERY presbyterian senior professor of agricultural engineering) for years. > [@Der\_Trihs](#): > > There’s [this.](http://www.evolvefish.com/fish/product563.html) ( “IXOYE” is a [variant of the Christian fish](http://www.ixoye.com/). ) Could you reach deep down and find that part of you that’s not a complete flaming asshole (I know it exists, I used to play CoH/CoV), and maybe let it take front seat just a smidge more often? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/23 "2009-06-22T15:54:47Z")
> [@Zeriel](#): > > Could you reach deep down and find that part of you that’s not a complete flaming asshole (I know it exists, I used to play CoH/CoV), and maybe let it take front seat just a smidge more often? Um… in what way was that post assholish? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/24 "2009-06-22T16:32:16Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Um… in what way was that post assholish? 😕 It made a JOKE about my BELIEF and I was OFFENDED? ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/25 "2009-06-22T16:34:56Z")
I find your random capitalization offensive. Unless I’m being whooshed. ---
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/26 "2009-06-22T16:41:02Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Um… in what way was that post assholish? 😕 It’s clearly not what she wanted AND he’s got a history of being the four-time World Flaming Douchenozzle Champion with regard to anything having to do with any religion ever? ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/27 "2009-06-22T16:42:43Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > I find your random capitalization offensive. Unless I’m being whooshed. I sUspeCt tHAt **EuPHoniOus POleMic** WAs mAKing A JoKe. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/28 "2009-06-22T16:49:25Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > I find your random capitalization offensive. Unless I’m being whooshed. I"m offended by your being whooshed. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/29 "2009-06-22T16:52:22Z")
> [@Zeriel](#): > > It’s clearly not what she wanted AND he’s got a history of being the four-time World Flaming Douchenozzle Champion with regard to anything having to do with any religion ever? It’s pretty close in spirt to what she wanted. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/30 "2009-06-22T16:58:48Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > It’s pretty close in spirt to what she wanted. And the closest thing I could find. ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/31 "2009-06-22T18:45:31Z")
In situations like that, I usually assume it’s the fundamentalist parents’ rebellious emo teenage kid at the wheel. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/32 "2009-06-22T20:48:44Z")
> [@Redwing](#): > > Ya know, I’ve never taken those signs that way. I’ve always seen them as addressed to rescue workers in case there’s an accident. I always thought they were just supposed to be cute, until someone pointed this out to me. (Kind of like “Tot Finder” window stickers?) **Der Trihs** , no, that’s obviously not what I meant. :rolleyes: But since I don’t drive, it’s moot anyways. (I really would just buy BOTH symbols if I did, the only probably would be finding a little heart) Mostly my point was, I HATE the idea that Christianity – hell, ANY religion and believing in evolution seem to be mutually exclusive to these yahoos. So it would probably raise a few eyebrows. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/33 "2009-06-22T20:54:08Z")
They’re not addressed to rescue workers. Otherwise they wouldn’t be in the back window. They’re to get other drivers to try extra hard not to hit you while you simultaneously drive and breastfeed. ---
**Author:** ![Chessic\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7c8e57/32.png) [@Chessic\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chessic_Sense)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/34 "2009-06-22T21:12:58Z")
> [@SweetLucy](#): > > It seems like the worst drivers around here have similar decorations on their vehicles. > [@Runestar](#): > > but it always seems to me that the worst drivers (i.e., the ones doing the stupid sh\*t) have those plates on their car. > [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Those “Jesus is my co-pilot” stickers are invariably stuck to the bumpers of people who can’t drive for shit. > [@Shirley\_Ujest](#): > > It has been my notice that people with the jesus stickers on their cars usually have crap tacular cars. > [@Clothahump](#): > > Well, it was obviously your fault for getting between them and their cookies and wine. It’s strange to me that some guy mentions Mexicans not controlling their kids at a restaurant and every single poster calls him racist, yet someone says Christians are bad drivers and everyone goes “Yup. They totally are”. It’s like if someone mentions race, it’s confirmation bias, but if it’s driving…well, it’s their religion, obviously. Please tell me that the clear bias isn’t being mentioned because it’s obvious, not because everyone is actually on board with this idea. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 9:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/35 "2009-06-22T21:21:56Z")
> [@Chessic\_Sense](#): > > It’s strange to me that some guy mentions Mexicans not controlling their kids at a restaurant and every single poster calls him racist, yet someone says Christians are bad drivers and everyone goes “Yup. They totally are”. It’s like if someone mentions race, it’s confirmation bias, but if it’s driving…well, it’s their religion, obviously. Please tell me that the clear bias isn’t being mentioned because it’s obvious, not because everyone is actually on board with this idea. Since you quoted me, I’ll address this. I didn’t say Christians are bad drivers. I said the subset of Christians who have “Jesus is my co-pilot” stickers are bad drivers. For the record, most Americans are Christian, and most Americans are bad drivers, so there are a lot of Christians in America who are bad drivers. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/36 "2009-06-22T21:35:01Z")
> [@Runestar](#): > > Here in Indiana, you can get a specialty license plate (as a no-cost option, instead of the standard license plate) with “In God We Trust” on it. > > I’m sure its anecdotal, but it always seems to me that the worst drivers (i.e., the ones doing the stupid sh\*t) have those plates on their car. I live in Indiana too, and that plate adorns both my cars. We did not ask for them, they were the ones we were given two years ago when we renewed our registration. We had the green and white ones before that, and they made us convert to the new ones. At least they are a cooler color than the old ones, I guess. ---
**Author:** ![C3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/c3/32/3108_2.png) [@C3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C3)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/37 "2009-06-22T22:29:52Z")
A friend of mine tells the story of the time he saw a car upside-down, in a ditch, on fire, with a bumper sticker reading, “God is my co-pilot”.\* - I can’t swear that this is a _true_ story. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/38 "2009-06-22T22:59:49Z")
> [@C3](#): > > A friend of mine tells the story of the time he saw a car upside-down, in a ditch, on fire, with a bumper sticker reading, “God is my co-pilot”.\* > > - I can’t swear that this is a _true_ story. If it isn’t, it ought to be. ---
**Author:** ![furlibusea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@furlibusea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furlibusea)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/39 "2009-06-22T23:06:55Z")
I have come to believe if they need to tell you that they are a Christian that badly its because they aren’t showing you. Those Christians that I know that walk the walk have no need to spout it from their bumpers. ---
**Author:** ![FoieGrasIsEvil](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foiegrasisevil/32/16638_2.png) [@FoieGrasIsEvil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FoieGrasIsEvil)\ **Post date:** [June 22, 2009, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513/40 "2009-06-22T23:34:27Z")
> [@furlibusea](#): > > I have come to believe if they need to tell you that they are a Christian that badly its because they aren’t showing you. Those Christians that I know that walk the walk have no need to spout it from their bumpers. I do believe that there’s reference in the Bible to that effect. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-drive-like-satan-if-you-have-christian-bumper-stickers/500513.md?page=3)