# Don't miss this important national day of observance! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 17, 2000, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102 "2000-04-17T02:20:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![pluto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f08c70/32.png) [@pluto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pluto)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/1 "2000-04-17T02:20:00Z")
I went with my son to the University of Washington student union building and found a poster for [this important day](http://www.mum.org/news.htm#anchor1813727) on a bulletin board by the drinking fountain. Let us know how **you** plan to celebrate! * * * “I’ll tell him but I don’t think he’ll be very keen. He’s already got one, you see!” ---
**Author:** ![Squee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@Squee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squee)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/2 "2000-04-17T02:23:00Z")
Does _Hallmark_ make a card for this occasion? 🙂 * * * “Penises don’t belong in the mouth, girls and boys. You’ve got the wrong hole there. Just like you wouldn’t shove pizza up your nose.” -From the **Brother Jed** flyer- ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/3 "2000-04-17T02:33:00Z")
I know that probably looks a little funny at first, but in fact, it’s not a bad idea. It seems to me to be more of an informational thing, rather than an actual celebration. That is a very good thing. I, for one, have never really talked to my mom about what it was like for her. There may be things I experience while I’m on my period that she went through as well. And there are an awful lot of reproductive health issues that women (myself included) just don’t know about. The Hallmark card idea is a good one, though! But my money is on Blue Mountain Arts. Talk about having a card for _everything…_ * * * Cristi, Slayer of Peeps I made my husband join a bridge club. He jumps next Tuesday. (title & sig courtesy of UncleBeer and WallyM7!) ---
**Author:** ![Ringo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/779978/32.png) [@Ringo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ringo)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/4 "2000-04-17T02:34:00Z")
A little red food dye in said water fountain, perhaps? ---
**Author:** ![aseymayo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e57/32.png) [@aseymayo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aseymayo)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/5 "2000-04-17T03:14:00Z")
I think I’ll try to celebrate with all the important menses in my life. Yeah, let’s get together and celebrate getting really f\*cked over in the reproduction department! Yippee! What the hell - why not celebrate? It’s better than being sent out of the village once a month. But I ain’t making any art. Period. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/6 "2000-04-17T03:46:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Squee: > > **Does _Hallmark_ make a card for this occasion?** I searched for one, but could not find it. However, for those of us who wish to not let this day go unheralded without the gift of a greeting card, feel free to add the following prose to a blank card or something you make up on your computer: > [@](#): > > Like Pearl Jam said, it’s “Even Flow” > A feeling that only women know. > But take solace, proud woman, it’s natural you see! > And a valid defence if you kill your hubby! > We feel for your sheets, they used to be white; > When you say that you’re bloated we run out of sight… > So please take a bow as I give you applause, > We’ll celebrate Menstrual Monday until you get menopause! Or maybe a Haiku: > [@](#): > > I am so bloated > Get me some tampons RIGHT NOW! > Unfertilized egg Okay. It’s obviously WAY too late… * * * Yer pal, Satan [http://www.raleighmusic.com/board/Images/devil.gif](http://www.raleighmusic.com/board/Images/devil.gif) _TIME ELAPSED SINCE I QUIT SMOKING: One week, one day, 1 hour, 35 minutes and 34 seconds. 322 cigarettes not smoked, saving $40.33. Life saved: 1 day, 2 hours, 50 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![MysterEcks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f475e1/32.png) [@MysterEcks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysterEcks)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/7 "2000-04-17T04:08:00Z")
I have a relative who manages a Hallmark store–I’m sending it to her and urging she bring it to the attention of her superiors. Unfortunately, Hallmark isn’t very good about catching these things–they missed National Pig Day (March 1) completely. I don’t know how I’ll celebrate yet, but I’ll definitely regard May 8 as a red-letter day. ---
**Author:** ![pluto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f08c70/32.png) [@pluto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pluto)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/8 "2000-04-17T04:39:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by aseymayo: > **But I ain’t making any art. Period.** Whooooosh! ---
**Author:** ![Fretful\_Porpentine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fretful_porpentine/32/2873_2.png) [@Fretful\_Porpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fretful_Porpentine)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/9 "2000-04-17T15:50:00Z")
Whoo hoo! Bloody Marys all around! ---
**Author:** ![the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f1d935/32.png) [@the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Scarlet_Pimpernel)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/10 "2000-04-17T15:53:00Z")
Whaddya know, Im hipper than I thought - today’s already _my_ Menstrual Monday. But I aint in no mood to celebrate. * * * Hey, sweetie! You want a Danish with that coffee? – _another custom design by the mind of Wally_ Whan that Aprillè with hise shourès soote The droghte of March had percèd to the roote, I druv a motor thro’ Aprillè’s bliz Somme forty mile, and dam neere lyke to friz. – Bert Leston Taylor ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/11 "2000-04-17T21:14:00Z")
I think I know the theme song! “It’s just another Menstrual Monday, Woooooooah, ooOOOHHHhhh, ooooohhhhhh Not my having fun day, Woooooooah, ooOOOHHHhhh, ooooohhhhhh Wish it were Sunday, Woooooooah, ooOOOHHHhhh, ooooohhhhhh…” * * * After all, what is your hosts’ purpose in having a party? Surely not for you to enjoy yourself; if that were their sole purpose, they’d have simply sent champagne and women over to your place by taxi. – P. J. O’Rourke ---
**Author:** ![cher3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cher3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cher3)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/12 "2000-04-17T21:18:00Z")
“My ‘I don’t have to run day.’” Ewww. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/13 "2000-04-17T21:20:00Z")
Then I guess they’re also planning a big splurge the Monday before Father’s Day. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/14 "2000-04-18T03:44:00Z")
You know, I just can’t wait 15-20 years for these young adults whom obviously have too much _time_and _energy_ on their hands, to grow up, get a mortgage, start a family, get a real job and gain thirty pounds. Then attend a reunion and reminisce about how they started the annual _Celebration of Menstrual Monday_. Their kids will piss their pants and their parents will demand a refund of collegiate tuition. I don’t know about you, but my favorite line of the flyer is: **Why: To create a sense of happiness and fun around menstruation…** Celebrate it? Hell, I couldn’t give away my period if I promised a brand new cadillac. Celebrate Menstrual Monday. If that ain’t an oxymoron, I don’t know what is. I bet it was a good idea before the weed and beer wore off. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/15 "2000-04-18T03:53:00Z")
Did anyone else notice the sense of irony, if you will, that this girl who wrote this also rambles on about \*cats \* in the first paragraph. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/16 "2000-04-18T03:58:00Z")
Kidding aside, I plan to celebrate by painting the town red. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/17 "2000-04-18T04:20:00Z")
Since I was sending in a payment for my daughter’s birth, I thought I would send a copy of this holiday to my doctors, along with this letter: Dear Docs, I just know that two hip and with it professionals like yourselves already know about this special, dare I say, red letter (pun intended) day. May 8th has been designated as _The First Annual Menstrual Monday._ I kid you not. It was brought to my attention by one of my imaginary friends from the internet. His daughter goes to school out in Washington State and saw a flyer about this and, well, he just had to share. It is positively too priceless. Now I know what they mean when they say \*higher _education. I bet it was a good idea until the weed and beer wore off. What’s next, March for the Lemmings Parade? I personally am holding out on these this silly holidays for something we all want to see, like, \* “When Winged Monkey’s Fly Out My Butt” day._ I printed out the entire page so you don’t think I suddenly have a fondness for crack and made this whole thing up. My plans for celebrating this landmark day? Glad you asked, I plan to paint the town red, of course. Anyways, enough tomfoolery, get back to work. Sincerely, Joan PS: Here’s the last of our mula owed. We now own child number two free and clear.:::blink:::: Hmmm, somehow, I get this sinking feeling that were not out of the woods yet. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 4:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/18 "2000-04-18T04:38:00Z")
I changed a line: I personally am holding out on these this silly holidays for something we all want to see, like, “When Winged Monkey’s Fly Out My Butt” day. Not my butt, per se, but our collective backsides…oh never mind. It’s motto: One Small Step For A Long Weekend, One Giant Leap For Proctology. ---
**Author:** ![pluto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f08c70/32.png) [@pluto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pluto)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/19 "2000-04-19T05:01:00Z")
Geez, **Shirl** for a person who got all bent out of shape because the newspaper got the facts wrong (particularly about your child’s gender!) – 1. It wasn’t my daughter it was my son. 2. We were just visiting, he doesn’t go to UW. 3. I am **not** imaginary. (Best Elephant Man voice --) I am a human being! However, since you have gone the extra mile in getting the word out about this potential new national holiday I will overlook the inaccuracies. You were probably just bitchy because you were on the rag. ---
**Author:** ![GolfWidow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a698b9/32.png) [@GolfWidow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GolfWidow)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102/20 "2000-04-18T18:07:00Z")
Wouldn’t “Sunday, Bloody Sunday” be a more appropriate day? * * * “Words fascinate me. They always have. For me, browsing in a dictionary is like being turned loose in a bank.” - Eddie Cantor [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-miss-this-important-national-day-of-observance/16102.md?page=2)