# Don't name your child after a JOKE in a TOM HANKS MOVIE! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 4, 2002, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896 "2002-09-04T01:08:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/241 "2004-04-26T14:30:13Z")
> [@GingerOfTheNorth](#): > > Damien. _Damien_. It could have been worse, I suppose. Ahem. That’s _my_ name. Why do you think I chose law as a profession? ---
**Author:** ![AwSnappity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a3d4f5/32.png) [@AwSnappity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AwSnappity)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/242 "2004-04-26T14:30:29Z")
> [@lee](#): > > Is the name Treat a family name perhaps? It is certainly a last name, sometimes used as a middle name. Nope, not a family name. They were thinking of spelling it Treit for a while, but I’m pretty sure they went with Treat. ---
**Author:** ![Marsie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@Marsie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marsie)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/243 "2004-04-26T21:15:38Z")
Our waitress over the weekend greeted us with: “I’ll be your server this evening. My name is Meagan.” All I could think was: “Of _course_ it is.” ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2004, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/244 "2004-04-26T22:18:30Z")
> [@Dewey Cheatem Undhow](#): > > Ahem. That’s _my_ name. Why do you think I chose law as a profession? Damn. I shoulda named him something even more waspy, to ensure he turned out a rich doctor. My brother’s girls are named Shayla and Cheyanna. F’real. ---
**Author:** ![Coulbean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Coulbean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coulbean)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/245 "2004-04-27T00:06:56Z")
My mom almost named me Erin. I’m so glad she went with Megan Maureen instead. My brother is Morgan Mason, and I don’t have a problem with the alliteration (Our last name is an “M” as well). Except for being refered to as M and M’s all throughout our childhood, I like it. My most recent little brother’s name is Logan Stanley, and though my parents didn’t realize it, and the Stanley part came from my grandpa’s first name, I get a kick out of the comic book reference. (say it: Logan Stan-ley) What bugs me is all the different spellings for my name now. I’m glad my mom kept it to 5 simple letters. M-E-G-A-N… There’s Meghan and Meagan and Meaghan and worst of all Maegan… ugh. ---
**Author:** ![badbadrubberpiggy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/57b2e6/32.png) [@badbadrubberpiggy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badbadrubberpiggy)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/246 "2004-04-27T00:10:47Z")
I used to hate my first name (Holly), when I was younger because it rhymes with so many words. I was subjected to the nickname “Holly Bolly” (yes, those kind of “balls”) for many years. However, now I’m thankful that my parents decide to keep the spelling the way it is supposed to look. No “Hollie” or “Holli” for me, at least. Now I like my name, I think it’s pretty and it’s not all that common. It does sound slightly porn-starrish with my middle name (Holly Kristin), but it could be worse. I could have been Hawli Keristen. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/247 "2004-04-27T00:49:31Z")
Huh. No idea why I didn’t post here the first time around. It would have been to mention that **kaylasmom** and I had never heard the name Michaela before we named our daughter. I swear, we hadn’t. **kaylasmom** wanted her named after me and she didn’t care for the name Michelle, so we made Michaela up. Then we’re out showing her off, and everybody thinks she’s named after _Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman_. HUH?? ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/248 "2004-04-27T00:57:51Z")
Well, my daughters name is Sophia Caroline, and regardless of what y’all might think ( 😛 ), I believe its a lovely name. Sophia: greek, “Wisdom” Caroline: english, “Joyful Song” Wisdom… Joy… Song… a good foundation for our little lady. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Flamsterette\_X](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/41988e/32.png) [@Flamsterette\_X](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flamsterette_X)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/249 "2004-04-27T01:07:59Z")
My friend CJ mentioned that his mom went to school with a **Penny Cashdollar**. Another one of my friends says her parents’ dentist was named **Dr. Toothman**. The same friend had a boss once whose name was **Dick Knob**. My friend Steve’s Gr. 2 teacher was named **Mrs. Fireball** … that would be a cool last name to have, but probably only for a while. But getting back to kids’ names and others: Precious Angel Chicago Safari Curry Downy February Weyekin-Ilp-Ilp Cash Money etc. **Some Unusual Names I’ve Encountered In Real Life** Sylver / Golden (a sister-brother combo I know at church) Jack Wang (a high school classmate of Jon and Eric’s) Autumn Leaf Wood (a girl who used to go to my high school) Mimosa / Tilia / Ficus (two sisters and a brother who used to go to my church; their dad was a botanist, which explained things) Citrus (the botanist named him at birth) Poppy Booth (a guy who used to go to my high school) Diamond / Majestic (a sibling combo) These names are from _The Odd Index_ by Stephen J. Spignesi: **87 People Named for Body Parts, Diseases, Medications, Cosmetics, or Something Having to Do with Sex** A. Pimple Abolena Sweat Ammonia Angina Keys Appendicitis Aspirin Autopsy Bernard Nicewanger Blanch Kidney Bobby Joe Gothard Castor Oil Charlie Hymen Chlorine Chloroform Citroniella Constance Hiccup Constipation Cornelia Tonsil Depression Diaphragm Dichloramentine Dick Wacker Digesta Diptheria Distemper Doloris Puke Douche Duncas Hymen Edward Vagina Esophagus Exczema Fallopian Flu Fred Dilldoe Fuk Eyw Gladys Pantzeroff Glycine Granuloma Halitosis Hang Nails Hernia Hyman Pleasure I.P. Blood Iodine Iona Outhouse Kotex Larry Ovary Latrina Lee Lung Lemaza Hotballs Listerine Maria Piles Meconium Meninges Menses Morphine Mr. Balls Mr. Fuck Nancy Nipples Nausaeous Nausea Ophelia Rottincrotch Penis Placenta Placenta Previa Poopie Positive Wasserman Pregmancy Pyelitis Rectum Sal Hepatica Saline Saliva Brown Smallpox Dingle Steve Spleen Syphilis Thomas Headache Thomas Measles Thyroid Toilet Preparations Twila Anus Urine Uvula Vagina Valve Vaseline Vomita Willis **37 People with Names for Which, I’m Sure, There Are Good Explanations** Artificial Flowers Auditorium Beautiful Swindler Bigamy Charity Ward Devotee War Emancipation Proclamation Freedom Fertilizer Gasoline Immaculate Conception Kidnap Larceny Large Smash League of Nations Let’s Stay Here Leverage Libel Limousine Machine Magazine Miscellaneous No Parking Petty Larceny Pictorial Review Refund Sparkplug Sylvania Thermal Tomb Try-em-and-See Victrola Weatherstrip What X.Y.Z. Y.Z. Z. **97 People Whose Names Were Probably a Source of Merciless Torment on the Playground** Amazon Average Boozer Bright Charles Smellybelly Constance Stench Critic Crook Cute Darling Delerious Delight Dimples Dream-Child Equal Etta Roach Evil Extra Fairest Famous Fatty Favorite Felony Fertilizer Filthy McNasty Flake Flunkey Fool Head Foreward March Free Love Gift of God Hallowed Handsome Haphazard Hasty Hazard Heathen Himself Honest Hot Hot Shot Ima Goose Ima Rose Bush Ima Valentine John Smellie Jolly Knowledge Largie Lassie Lawless Lawyer Lonely Looney Looney Head Lord Love Love Bird Low Lucifer Lucky Blunder Luscious Margaret Black Butts Midget Modest Normal Old Peculier Perfect Person Pleasant Poor Boy Right Rimmer Roach Rodent Rudolph Goldshitter Silent Soggie Special Strange Odor Andrews Suck Sylvester Smells Tiny Small Too Late Toy Trouble Truly White Tweetie Unexpected Useless Vice Wealthy Weary Willibald Thumbfart Wimpy Wonderful Zero **35 People Whose Names Nicely Fit Their Occupations** Albert Palm: Masseur Arthur Blessit: Baptist evangelist Brenda Love: author of _The Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Positions_ Deloris Hearsum: Deaf typist for a deaf social agency Denver Driver: Truck driver Don Tree: Gardener Donald Moos: Washington state official in charge of dairy reports Dorothy Reading: Librarian Filmore Graves: Mortician Frank Deadman: Mortician Gordon Marsh: Biologist Hazel Wolf: Works for the Audubon Society Jack Putz: Golf pro James Bond: Detective James Bugg: Exterminator John Barber: Barber Judge Judge: Judge Ken Priest: Protestant minister Lee Coffin: Mortician Max Money: Tax collector Michael Angelo: Artist Michael Fox: Veterinarian Milo B. High: Elvis’ pilot Mr. Brain: Teacher Mr. Bury: Mortician Mr. Sexsmith: Marriage counsellor Mrs. Bowman: Archery instructor Mrs. Cook: Baking teacher Muffin Fry: Baker Ronald Drown: Lifeguard Sam Wood: Lumber dealer Storm Field: Weatherman Sweep Hand: Watch repairman Virgil Buryman: Mortician Wake Doom: Mortician **21 Doctors Who Probably Have to Talk About Their Names a Lot** Dr. Bees: Veterinary assistant (to Dr. Lyons) Dr. Blood: Hematologist Dr. Brain: Neurologist Dr. Cartledge: Podiatrist Dr. Childs: Pediatrician Dr. Cure: Doctor Dr. Docter: Doctor Dr. Dolphin: Veterinarian Dr. Eather: Anesthesiologist Dr. Head: Neurologist Dr. Heard: Eye, Ear, Nose, and Throat Specialist Dr. Hertz: Chiropractor Dr. Jack Fealy: Gynecologist Dr. Leak: Urologist Dr. Lyons: Veterinarian Dr. Organ: Doctor Dr. Saw: Orthopedist Dr. Sawbones: Doctor Dr. Shrink: Psychiatrist Dr. Will Diddle: Obstetrician / Gynecologist Dr. Willian Rash: Dermatologist **3 Nurses Who Picked the Right Specialty** A. Nurse: Nurse Ida Toomer: Oncology nurse Prue Cramp: OB / GYN nurse **48 People Having Food Names or Names Having Something to Do with Food** Apple Cider Baby Ruth Bannana Barbara Beans Champagne Cold Turkey Dill Pickle Gardenia Salad Garlic Hearty Meal Herb Rice Hershey Bar Hominy Ice Cream Jelly Bean Lemon Custer Lemon Freeze Lettuce Fields Liza Cucumber Loin Lunch Margarine Mazola Meat Grease Meat Loaf Oatmeal Oleomargarine Olive Green Orange Jello Orangeade Piece O. Cake Pork Chop Sam Broccoli Sam Omelette Sasparilla Sausage Soda Spicy Fudge Strawberry Commode Summer Butter Turnip Utensil Vanilla Watermellon Patch Weldon Rumproast Wheat Bread Whisky Wine F\_X ---
**Author:** ![AwSnappity](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a3d4f5/32.png) [@AwSnappity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AwSnappity)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/250 "2004-04-27T01:15:00Z")
In the same vein as **Flammi** ’s list, my gynecologist at school is named Dr. Grabher. :eek: I’m not kidding, unfortunately. ---
**Author:** ![Reepicheep](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ed655f/32.png) [@Reepicheep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reepicheep)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/251 "2004-04-27T01:26:50Z")
\*\*Flamsterette\_X \*\* Brava!! Just a note that I know a Sylvania. She married a man who’s surname was Woods. So now she is really Sylvania Woods. ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/252 "2004-04-27T01:31:13Z")
The only other person I’ve met [in over 50 years] with my name, **Wyn** is my mother’s sister, who I was named for. I really hated it at school, and envied all the kids with ‘normal’ names, but I’ve sort of got used to it now. Since I came online I’ve had a real problem with people assuming that I’m male - maybe there are some guys out there with my name, but I’ve never met any of them. ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Serpentine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3be4f8/32.png) [@Silver\_Serpentine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Serpentine)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/253 "2004-04-27T02:52:52Z")
**Zombies** - I have a friend (D’Arcy) whose sister is named Wynne. So, there’s another person out there. I suppose it doesn’t help much that it’s a girl. – **JohnT** - I think it’s a lovely name. Spelled just fine. And Sophia’s a pretty name. * * * When I first moved to Texas, I was confronted by a name I’d never heard anywhere else in the country: Cricket. My mom ent to school with one, worked with another, and one was a news lady. Is this just an area fluke, or are there more people out there named after an annoying bug? ---
**Author:** ![Never\_to\_be\_Queen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Never\_to\_be\_Queen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Never_to_be_Queen)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/254 "2004-04-27T03:17:11Z")
I would rather have one of these modern names than an older family name in many cases. Not a day goes by that I am thankful I did not end up as Pocahontas, Murleen, Iowa or Thelma. Men in the family were named things like Buford, Gilbert, Cannon, Randolph and Carper. It’s no wonder these people take nicknames like Tootie-Bug. ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/255 "2004-04-27T11:02:19Z")
> [@Silver Serpentine](#): > > **Zombies** - I have a friend (D’Arcy) whose sister is named Wynne. So, there’s another person out there. I suppose it doesn’t help much that it’s a girl. On the contrary, I’m glad to hear that I’m not the only female out there stuck with what I was sure was a guy’s name. As for **Cricket** , are you sure that they were called after the bug and not the game [though IMHO watching cricket on TV is like watching paint dry] Here in the UK stories occasionally crop up in the papers about strange sports fans who name their children after ALL the members of their favourite football team - these poor kids must dread official forms which require you to write your full name…OUCH!!! ---
**Author:** ![lee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lee/32/7455_2.png) [@lee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lee)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 11:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/256 "2004-04-27T11:24:33Z")
> [@Silver Serpentine](#): > > **Zombies** - I have a friend (D’Arcy) whose sister is named Wynne. So, there’s another person out there. I suppose it doesn’t help much that it’s a girl. > > – > > **JohnT** - I think it’s a lovely name. Spelled just fine. And Sophia’s a pretty name. > > * * * > > When I first moved to Texas, I was confronted by a name I’d never heard anywhere else in the country: Cricket. My mom ent to school with one, worked with another, and one was a news lady. > > Is this just an area fluke, or are there more people out there named after an annoying bug? Crickets are lucky! Cricket Lui is the foremost expert on BIND. ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/257 "2004-04-27T11:25:01Z")
**Zombies** , my childhood neighbour and honourary grandparent was named Wynn. I think it may have been short for Winifred. Recently, I participated in a group effort to talk a young Mrs. Cox out of naming her next son Roman. Despite the obvious problems with the name, she wasn’t sure if it was something she should be concerned about, and someone else assured her that kids would find something to tease him about no matter what she named him. This is the strangest logic I’ve ever encountered. Thankfully, she came to agree with the group opinion, and Roman is no longer in contention. ---
**Author:** ![belladonna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/9fc29f/32.png) [@belladonna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/belladonna)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/258 "2004-04-27T11:25:38Z")
Both Crickets I’ve known were nicknames for Christine, for what it’s worth. And you can add me to the list of the odd name brigade, mine is the same as **Silver** ’s friend, strangely enough, but spelled differently. It’s another name that is technically male, but is used for both. I know I’ve posted this to these name threads before (maybe even this one–as old as it is) but the craziest names I’ve personally known were Mecca Lee (I always heard the PeeWee chant in my head when she walked by) Stormy Wonder and her brother Chance Avatar Golden Brown (a beautiful biracial girl–fitting at least) But then again, I named one of my kids Atticus so I probably shouldn’t poke too much fun! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/259 "2004-04-27T11:47:05Z")
Here in India it is surprisingly common for women to be nicknamed—or even formally named—Dimple, Pinkie, or Twinkle. I believe at least a couple of those were names of Bollywood movie stars of an earlier generation, but I’m not sure I consider that a good enough excuse. Good heavens, there are so many beautiful Indian names and you chose to call your daughter Dimple?? I used to think it was amusingly bizarre that my first cousin named his three sons Dylan, Dakota, and Duke (which might go over okay for three Colorado lads with a last name like Wayne or Carson, but IMHO just doesn’t fly for Jewish New Yorkers with our odd-sounding Eastern European surname). But compared to some of the examples on this thread, it sounds positively conventional! ---
**Author:** ![ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/b4bc9f/32.png) [@ZombiesAteMyBrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZombiesAteMyBrain)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2004, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896/260 "2004-04-27T13:04:11Z")
An internet acquaintance has recently been telling everyone about her new grand-daughter who has been called **Ireland**. I’ve never heard of anyone called after a country before. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-name-your-child-after-a-joke-in-a-tom-hanks-movie/126896.md?page=14)