# Don't steal the peas if you can't do the time **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 2, 2007, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298 "2007-10-02T19:42:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2007, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/21 "2007-10-02T22:20:18Z")
The local cops have the perp surrounded on his [del]stoop[/del] veranda. He reaches toward his back pocket and gets sprayed with 67 bullets. He was pulling out his wallet but “We saw a flash! We thought it was a pea shooter!” ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2007, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/22 "2007-10-02T23:18:04Z")
[QUOTE=Sauron] Your wish is my command: [/QUOTE] Mrs. PLant has just returned from New Yawk. I shall annoy her with this most excellent recipe. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Tapiotar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3be4f8/32.png) [@Tapiotar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapiotar)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 12:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/23 "2007-10-03T00:41:58Z")
With this story, you have become one of the gods of the Straight Dope. (I guess you have been one for a while, but as I’m a (non-incest) relative newcomer, I’m seeing it for the first time. ) Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/24 "2007-10-03T00:47:05Z")
[QUOTE=Sauron] And NASCAR is entirely too popular. [/QUOTE] As a huge NASCAR fan living in the NASCARless Northwest, I could never imagine such a thing. ---
**Author:** ![Tully\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7ab992/32.png) [@Tully\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tully_Mars)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/25 "2007-10-03T02:21:32Z")
Elvis sang, “There will be peas in the valley for meeee someday …” Do they have valleys in Alabama? Damn, this thread made me hungry. ---
**Author:** ![Q.E.D](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/51bf81/32.png) [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/26 "2007-10-03T02:55:12Z")
[QUOTE=NinjaChick] Peas are gross. [/QUOTE] Hey, give peas a chance. ---
**Author:** ![Randy\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee7513/32.png) [@Randy\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Randy_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/27 "2007-10-03T03:04:44Z")
[QUOTE=Sauron] […] He probably enjoys a good meal of fresh-picked peas, corn bread, mashed potatoes, green beans and a slab of Vidalia onion whenever he can. So pea theft resonates with him. [snip] … as they search them for other contraband, like okra or (depending on how hard-core the thieves were) maybe even yams. [snip] Might have even cooked them up first and served them with some fried squash and zucchini.[…] [/QUOTE] Is everyone in the South a vegetarian? ---
**Author:** ![Brynda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Brynda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brynda)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/28 "2007-10-03T03:13:01Z")
Well, most of those vegetables will have some sorta fatback or bacon in them. ---
**Author:** ![Auntbeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Auntbeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Auntbeast)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/29 "2007-10-03T05:32:17Z")
Mmmm…yellow squash sauteed in bacon and onions…food of the gods. I can’t wait to move to the country and make friends (people that bring me food) No joke, my Grandmother has a Food Fairy. She comes home to food in her fridge all the time. Veggies on the counter, casserole in the fridge…you name it. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/30 "2007-10-03T06:04:12Z")
[QUOTE=Q.E.D.] Hey, give peas a chance. [/QUOTE] No way. If a pea got the chance it would eat you and everyone you care about. Down with peas. Napalm those suckers back to the Stone Age. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/31 "2007-10-03T06:15:52Z")
[QUOTE=racer72] As a huge NASCAR fan living in the NASCARless Northwest, I could never imagine such a thing. [/QUOTE] Care to trade lives? I’ll even spring for the disguises, if you’d like to try a surreptitious “switcheroo”… ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/32 "2007-10-03T12:53:46Z")
[QUOTE=Tapiotar] With this story, you have become one of the gods of the Straight Dope. [/QUOTE] Today the SDMB, tomorrow the WORLD! **Randy Seltzer** : The South was poor for a long, long, long time, until sometime around last Tuesday. Because of that, people grew up eating fairly cheap food, and the cheapest food was what you could grow yourself. Thus, a lot of vegetables. But no, vegetarianism isn’t a thriving lifestyle choice down here. I seriously doubt there’s a pig, cow or chicken that sleeps well at night in this area. **Tully Mars** : Alabama is eat up with hills, valleys and ridges, at least until you get down close to the coastline/Wiregrass area. Then it’s mostly flat. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/33 "2007-10-03T13:49:49Z")
[QUOTE=Q.E.D.] Hey, give peas a chance. [/QUOTE] Visualize whirled peas. ETA: I look forward to the match-up between **Sauron** and **Master Wang-Ka**. Writing such as theirs is one of the things that makes this board THE place to be. ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/34 "2007-10-03T13:55:24Z")
[QUOTE=Scuba\_Ben] I look forward to the match-up between **Sauron** and **Master Wang-Ka**. Writing such as theirs is one of the things that makes this board THE place to be. [/QUOTE] Somebody ( **ivylass** , maybe?) suggested once that **Master Wang-Ka** , **Scylla** , **Sampiro** and myself have some sort of storytelling contest. I responded that I’d cheerfully take fourth-place in that competition and be happy. Those guys have a gift … I have pea stories. Thank you for the compliment. I like to write, and this place gives me an outlet I don’t have elsewhere. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/35 "2007-10-03T14:11:46Z")
[QUOTE=Sauron] Somebody ( **ivylass** , maybe?) suggested once that **Master Wang-Ka** , **Scylla** , **Sampiro** and myself have some sort of storytelling contest. I responded that I’d cheerfully take fourth-place in that competition and be happy. Those guys have a gift … I have pea stories. [/QUOTE] Don’t forget your reports of encounters with planetary royalty. Would we need to get mod/admin approval before starting an on-board storytelling competition? If it makes any difference, I visualize the entry thread as being appropriate for CS – creative arts and all that – with an announcement & discussion thread here in MPSIMS. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/36 "2007-10-03T14:27:03Z")
[QUOTE=Randy Seltzer] Is everyone in the South a vegetarian? [/QUOTE] If you actually read the recipes for that stuff, you’d realize it’s at least half pork. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/37 "2007-10-03T14:51:12Z")
[QUOTE=Q.E.D.] Hey, give peas a chance. [/QUOTE] That’s all we are saying. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/38 "2007-10-03T14:55:16Z")
And when caught, didn’t the perp exclaim “Peas release me! Let me go!” I _luuuuuurrrrrrveee_ me some fresh peas. They is good enough to eat right out of the pod. Sweeeeeeet!! And for some reason, I never see them in the supermarkets here. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/39 "2007-10-03T16:53:08Z")
Important note: Are we talking Blackeyed or green? ---
**Author:** ![Sauron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@Sauron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sauron)\ **Post date:** [October 3, 2007, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298/40 "2007-10-03T16:56:33Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant] Important note: Are we talking Blackeyed or green? [/QUOTE] Blackeyed or field. Green peas are an abomination. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-steal-the-peas-if-you-cant-do-the-time/421298.md?page=3)