# Don't underestimate the power of the pepperoni!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [October 6, 2004, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783 "2004-10-06T02:12:37Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![DrMemory](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@DrMemory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrMemory)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/41 "2004-10-08T12:37:54Z")

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We should get inside. The Anchovies are easily startled, but they will be back in greater numbers.

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**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/42 "2004-10-08T13:05:09Z")

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> [@Bear\_Nenno](#):
>
> “Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your pizza.”  
> “He told me you ate it!”

FUNN-EEEE!! I can just picture Mark Hamill delivering that line…

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**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/43 "2004-10-08T13:16:29Z")

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I am familiar with over six million toppings…

But I was going over to Tachi Station to pick up a thin crust…

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**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/44 "2004-10-08T13:42:55Z")

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“The Mos Eisley Pizzeria: You’ve never seen such a hive of scum and outright health code violations. We must be careful.”

* * *

\<Going somewhere Solo?\>

Yes, Greedo. As a matter of fact, I was just going to see your boss. Tell Pizza hut I’ve got their money.

\<It’s too late. You should have paid when you had the chance.\>

Yeah, but this time I’ve got the money.

\<If you tip me with it, I might forget I found you.\>

I don’t have it with me. Tell Pizza Hut-

\<Pizza hut has no time for delivery boys who dump their pizzas at the first sign of a big tip.\>

* * *

Of course this begs the question, would Han Solo, Corrillian pizza delivery boy, drive a souped-up pinto, which he won in a bet?

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**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/45 "2004-10-08T18:28:13Z")

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> [@Odinoneeye](#):
>
> the odds are 17 to 6

I think you overestimate their chances.

Enjoy,  
Steven

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**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/46 "2004-10-08T19:10:27Z")

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> [@sturmhauke](#):
>
> Join me, and together we will corner the pizza market as father and son.

:eek: Papa John???

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**Author:** ![Jenny\_Haniver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Jenny\_Haniver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenny_Haniver)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/47 "2004-10-08T19:15:47Z")

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“Sir, it’s quite possible this pizza crust is not entirely stable.”

“Not entirely stable? I’m glad you’re here to tell us these things. Chewie, take the professor in the back and plug him into the hyper-oven.”

* * *

“This ground sure feels strange. It doesn’t feel like rock.”

::blaster fire::

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. Pizza Hut Corporate Executive. Chewie, check the rest of the ship, make sure there aren’t any more attached. Putting cheese in the power cables.”

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**Author:** ![DogMom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9c0ed/32.png) [@DogMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DogMom)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/48 "2004-10-08T19:39:59Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> “Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your pizza.”  
> “He told me you ate it!”

And of course the following line would be…  
“I am your father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate’s pizza.”

😃

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**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/49 "2004-10-08T19:51:44Z")

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I see your pepperoni is as big as mine.

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**Author:** ![Redwing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/dfb087/32.png) [@Redwing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redwing)\
**Post date:** [October 8, 2004, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/50 "2004-10-08T20:24:41Z")

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Luke, _ **I** _ am your manager.

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**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\
**Post date:** [October 15, 2004, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/51 "2004-10-15T20:32:57Z")

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“I’m not in this for your precious slumber party, Princess. I expect to be well-tipped.”

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**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Zamboni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@The\_Great\_Zamboni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Zamboni)\
**Post date:** [October 16, 2004, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/52 "2004-10-16T05:14:03Z")

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Why did Lord Vader try to rob the guy forcefully? All he needed to do was use the force for telekinesis and pull the money away.

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**Author:** ![muffinismydog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/958977/32.png) [@muffinismydog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muffinismydog)\
**Post date:** [October 16, 2004, 11:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/53 "2004-10-16T11:19:23Z")

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pizza, pizza everywhere  
and not a slice to spare!!!

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**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\
**Post date:** [October 16, 2004, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/54 "2004-10-16T13:20:08Z")

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> [@betenoir](#):
>
> There is no pie…there is only do.

Ooh, ooh! An alternative:

There is no pie . . . there is only dough.

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**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\
**Post date:** [October 17, 2004, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/55 "2004-10-17T21:02:05Z")

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> [@DogMom](#):
>
> And of course the following line would be…  
> “I am your father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate’s pizza.”
> 
> 😃

“So, what does that make us?”

“Absolutely nothing.”

Although, for the record, my favorite line is “Now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.”

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**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\
**Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/56 "2004-10-18T06:20:34Z")

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LANDO: “I’ve made a deal that will keep Domino’s out of our hair for good.”

\<The door slides open to reveal: \>

VADER [wearing a Domino’s cap]: “I would be honored if you would join me for dinner.”

\<Panicked, HAN draws his blaster and shoots at him, but VADER deflects the blaster bolts with an Individual Size extra-cheese-and-sausage pizza in his hand.\>

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**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\
**Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 8:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/57 "2004-10-18T08:50:44Z")

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Luke : I don’t understand how we got by those farts. I thought we were dead.  
Obi-Wan : The Sauce can have a strong influence on a weak stomach.

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**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\
**Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/58 "2004-10-18T13:57:06Z")

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- I’m not in this for your precious Rebellion, Princess. I expect to be well fed.

- Don’t worry. If pizza is all you love, then that’s what you’ll receive.

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**Author:** ![Zog\_10](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c57346/32.png) [@Zog\_10](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zog_10)\
**Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/59 "2004-10-18T14:13:21Z")

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_A Papa John’s delivery van drives down a lonely road. It pulls up to a house at the end of the road. The delivery man steps out of the truck, and walks towards the door. Suddenly, many Domino’s employees jump out of the woods and rush the delivery man…_

[Admiral Ackbar] It’s a trap! [/Admiral Ackbar]

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**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\
**Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dont-underestimate-the-power-of-the-pepperoni/267783/60 "2004-10-18T21:31:21Z")

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Pizza? But I was going to Toshi Station to pick up some potstickers!

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