# DOOMED THREADS

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [November 25, 2000, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615 "2000-11-25T04:02:01Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/1 "2000-11-25T04:02:01Z")

</div>

For those threads you’d like to post but know they’d last about fifteen minutes before being closed by the moderator. Example:

**Where can I find kiddy porn on the Web?**

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/2 "2000-11-25T04:56:30Z")

</div>

**Help me Murder Cecil Adams**

**Fred Phelps is a Genius**

**Why Concrete Should be Made a Mod**

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Welfy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e56c9b/32.png) [@Welfy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Welfy)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/3 "2000-11-25T05:13:37Z")

</div>

MANNY PEOPLE ASK ME NOW AND I WANDER…  
Felching: It’s What’s for Dinner  
I’m a Nazi and I Don’t Care What you Think!!!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![malkavia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malkavia/32/5621_2.png) [@malkavia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/malkavia)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/4 "2000-11-25T05:28:45Z")

</div>

“Intelligent people are never animal lovers.”

“Im a militant smoker - Light up or else!”

“Anyone know where I can score some E?”

“Click here to help me asassinate the president.”

“Looking for baby recipes: They were out of Turkeys at Abco and the little guy cries too damned much.”

“How do I hide my neighbor’s childs’ bruises?”

“How do I hide my neighbors child?”

…Oohkay, Im pretty tired.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![mrblue92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@mrblue92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrblue92)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/5 "2000-11-25T05:37:32Z")

</div>

“Who wants to help me build a fertilizer bomb?”

“Ask the serial killer!”

“Call 1-900-… for a great time!”

And of course…

“What is the third word that ends with GRY?”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/6 "2000-11-25T06:20:24Z")

</div>

Live forever! Ask me how!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Instant\_Pleasure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/839c29/32.png) [@Instant\_Pleasure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Instant_Pleasure)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/7 "2000-11-25T06:26:29Z")

</div>

“I have a complaint to make about a moderator”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![tshirts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/839c29/32.png) [@tshirts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tshirts)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/8 "2000-11-25T09:05:46Z")

</div>

**What’s the difference between MPSIMS and IMHO** when asked in Comments on Cecil’s Columns

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![blastfurnace](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5e9695/32.png) [@blastfurnace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blastfurnace)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 10:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/9 "2000-11-25T10:06:36Z")

</div>

“Why Jack Dean Taylor rules my world”

“How do I get rid of the bodies afterwards?”

“I love Bush…and Gore!!”

“Canadians…God love 'Em”

“IMOHO…why mass murder is good ; )”

“My favorite prison rape stories”

and…

“Does anyone want to drink my urine?”

(I’m sorry…these were channeled through me by some evil doer!)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/10 "2000-11-25T20:39:29Z")

</div>

Why I’m Proud to be a Rapist

I was out Munging last night…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 8:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/11 "2000-11-25T20:44:46Z")

</div>

White people rule the world and rightfully so

Why can’t women accept their role and stay in the kitchen?

The SDMB cyber sex thread!

How can you kill someone and leave no trace?

Cecil Adams can suck my @#&%

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Nymysys](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f6c823/32.png) [@Nymysys](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nymysys)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/12 "2000-11-25T20:46:54Z")

</div>

\*\*All of you people think you’re so goddamned smart!

I’m just using this place to pick-up chicks. Any takers?

Fuck Cecil Adams! Twerp!

Can someone tell me why everyone hates JDT?\*\*

and my personal favorite…

**Moderator Celebrity DeathMatch!**

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/13 "2000-11-25T21:05:47Z")

</div>

Revealed - the Bible tells all.

Machine code, a question.

My favourite nostril

Recipe ideas for toenails.

Jerry Springer - intellectual milestones.

How do I bug the Ladies rest room ?

F%@#ing Emmy judges biased against Spice Girls, not fair.

They were better off as slaves.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![omni-not](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8dc957/32.png) [@omni-not](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/omni-not)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/14 "2000-11-25T21:07:18Z")

</div>

Mine.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/15 "2000-11-25T22:47:00Z")

</div>

Anyone Know How To Breed Ebola?

What’s Wrong With Gassing Jews?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![filthy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@filthy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filthy)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/16 "2000-11-25T22:58:43Z")

</div>

The tenth recipe in the ‘Viscera Victuals Cook Book’.

The third one, too, now that I think about it.

How do you find / make TNT?

Here’s how to build a swivle gun.

Frag-bomb the fundies!

Frag-bomb the atheists!

Here’s how ya build a frag-bomb.

Damn, where did I come up with all this violence?  
😃

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/17 "2000-11-25T23:03:15Z")

</div>

Jack Dean Taylor Gave Me the Best Sex of My Life  
(btw, WTF IS JDT? I see all the threads about him, but I feel like I’m missing something.)

Hitler Is My Hero

Is it WRONG to be Sexually Aroused by My Cat?

Those Kids at Columbine Deserved to Die

How to Rob a Bank-HELP!!!

Pictures of My Dog’s Bunghole

My Sexual Fantasies about Joe Don Baker

Kidney Theft Happened to My Cousin’s Stepsister’s Friend’s Half sister!

(btw, I think a Mods Celeb Death Match might be pretty kewl…)  
You know…I just realized something: I have a sick mind.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Diceman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Diceman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diceman)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/18 "2000-11-25T23:14:11Z")

</div>

“David Feldman is the original fact-finder. Cecil Adams is a copycating hack.”

"What’s the URL for _LaRon’s Haouse of MP3’s, On-line Drug Sales, and Kiddie Porn_?

“I want to get into the exciting, fast-paced world of credit card fraud. How do I start?”

“How do I hack into the the SDMB server and ban all of the moderators and aministrators?” 😃

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![filthy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@filthy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/filthy)\
**Post date:** [November 25, 2000, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/19 "2000-11-25T23:20:41Z")

</div>

Here’s another:

Have sister’s body and need to dismember it HELP!!  
Also need recipes.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Homer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df788c/32.png) [@Homer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homer)\
**Post date:** [November 26, 2000, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615/20 "2000-11-26T00:08:43Z")

</div>

IIRC, the fertilizer bomb and the perfect murder threads have been done, as have the body disposal threads. I think people cooking has been done, as well as TNT making and animal sex.

They were probably all lost in conversion, though, but they were VERY enlightening.

::rubs hands together::

–Tim

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doomed-threads/42615.md?page=2)
