# Doperball II **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 20, 2004, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687 "2004-08-20T06:31:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/21 "2004-08-20T19:33:10Z")
Making a one handed, diving, double twisting back flip in pike position catch off **Hal’s** fancy, French sligshot, Doctor Jackson of Team 2 sticks the landing. After posing for the judges, Doc rares back and fires a BB at Team 1, then throws the ball to… ---
**Author:** ![Phelan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a183cd/32.png) [@Phelan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phelan)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/22 "2004-08-20T19:52:47Z")
So **Hal** started with it, then it went to **danceswithcats** , then to **harmless** , who thought the ball came from **hal** , but it came from **danceswithcats** , then on to **Doctor Jackson** who passes it to me **Phelan** … They’re all on my team, team Glad Those Bastards Have Standup I think…Aw screw it, kicks the ball and SCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORES!!! _Starts dancing to the celebration music._ ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/23 "2004-08-20T19:58:49Z")
Hey **JimSox5** …see why I never ref’d more than one game of Doperball? 🙂 Check the order…as far as I can see, it went from me to **danceswithcats** , and then it got all screwed up. Remember folks, name the person you’re getting the ball from. We may have had a score there, but it’s up to the ref to call it. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/24 "2004-08-20T20:00:23Z")
One thing: It sure would be easier if everyone would mention what team they’re on when they post. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/25 "2004-08-20T20:26:36Z")
So I’m on \*\*Team Two \*\* and I have the ball. After posing in my authentic Olympic outfit I pass the ball to… ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/26 "2004-08-20T21:13:04Z")
Dwalin of Team 2 deftly catches the ball. Excited by the fact of actually catching something, he sprints down to Team 1’s goal. Unfortunately, he’s so excited he doesn’t notice that he dropped the ball halfway down the field. The ball is caught by… ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/27 "2004-08-20T21:18:22Z")
…Team 2 member **Hal** , who scoops up **dwalin** ’s fumble, checks the field, and sees a wide open goal. Remembering how badly Team 1 was outnumbered last time, I decide to pass it off, hoping a teammate will push it in for the two-fer. And it flies into the hands of… [hijack] Just because it’d be so damn fitting, I nominate **Zebra** for ref of the next game. [/hijack] 😃 ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/28 "2004-08-20T21:22:06Z")
Me! Me! : catches\*\* Hal’s \*\* girlish pass and runs it in for a score, or sumpthin’ : 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/29 "2004-08-20T22:15:17Z")
Wooohoooo! Three-zip (I think)! Retreiving the ball from the goal and running it back to mid-field, I send a massive, manly kick heading back to the goal. After accidentally (I assure you 😛 ) caroming it off the back of **harmless** ’ head, it’s picked up by… ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2004, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/30 "2004-08-20T22:33:03Z")
(team 2) **Johnny Bravo,** who combines the skills of Shaolin Kung Fu and Doperball to send a flaming ball of fire right at… ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2004, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/31 "2004-08-21T03:25:05Z")
Team 2 **danceswithcats** who was standing on the sidelines scratching his nether regions, but nonetheless belched loudly, caught the ball, tripped over a stray hedgehog, and tossed the ball to… ---
**Author:** ![Sir\_Dirx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b77776/32.png) [@Sir\_Dirx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_Dirx)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2004, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/32 "2004-08-21T04:35:09Z")
**Sir Dirx** of Team 1 intercepts the toss and the crowd goes wild! Taking a moment to let the Matrix-style camera effects capture the move from every angle, he lobs the ball down towards the goal to be caught by… ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2004, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/33 "2004-08-21T05:11:14Z")
…Team Two’s **Hal Briston** , who is not about to let Team One get a peek at the scoreboard! After picking off **Sir Dirx** , he stands midfield for a moment, waiting for an approaching UPS truck to pull on to the field. After the driver unloads his cargo, **Hal** rips open a few large crates marked as being from the Acme Corporation. He quickly assembles the giant slingshot he cleverly ordered at kickoff, mounts it in the field, loads it up and sends the doperball careening downfield at mach 2, where… ---
**Author:** ![flamingbananas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f4b2a3/32.png) [@flamingbananas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flamingbananas)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2004, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/34 "2004-08-21T05:22:34Z")
Where **flamingbananas** of Team 2 catches the ball mid-air. While doing a victory dance of catching a ball for once, she trips and falls flat on her face. The ball slips from her hands and goes to… ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Bravo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_bravo/32/493_2.png) [@Johnny\_Bravo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Bravo)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2004, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/35 "2004-08-21T05:27:04Z")
…Team 2’s **Johnny Bravo** , who bounces it off his butt and into the goal! Goooooal! ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2004, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/36 "2004-08-21T06:03:47Z")
Okay folks, let me try to sort this out. Maybe I should’ve waited another day or two to do this; I’m moving into college this weekend. Okay, we had the **Standup** mixup, which I then further confused the situation by confusing it myself, and now all hell has broken loose. Okay, here are the scores as I see it, if there are any complaints, just tell me, because obviously, I’m not perfect. **Team 1** : **Team 2** : Okay, you know what? I really don’t have a clue. Some ref, huh? 😃 So, here’s the beauty of playing unofficial sports. . .do over! Yes, folks, as ref, I have declared that a warm-up round! And yes, **Hal** , I see why you got out of this job pretty quickly. And also, now that I’m all done packing, I should be around more now. A few more things: Make sure you say who the ball came from! Also, I like **Johnny Bravo** ’s suggestion of the post your team thing. Just put it in the subject of your post or something like that. Here’s another chart for teams: Team 1: A C E G I K M O Q S U W Y Team 2: B D F H J L N P R T V X Z And let’s try this again! Ball’s in the middle! ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2004, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/37 "2004-08-25T20:31:08Z")
Ok…I’ll give the ball (and this thread) a bump downfield… ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2004, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/38 "2004-08-25T20:49:17Z")
Thank you, **Hal** , I was sure this thread was dead. I’m all moved in, now, so I should be here to be a good ref, and not let another **Stand-up** situation. ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2004, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/39 "2004-08-25T21:19:11Z")
Downfield from **Hal Briston** , to everyone’s great dismay, is **Standup Karmic** of Team 1, using his laptop to search [amazon.com](http://amazon.com) for books that might fall under the keywords, “sports,” “inept,” “self-help,” and “clumsy” when the ball lands gives him a quick poke in the face, breaking his glasses. Feeling he has little choice but to at least try to redeem himself, he removes the broken remnants of his spectacles, stands tall and proud, and looks upfield. Wondering, “am I shirts or skins?” he tosses the ball in hopes that it will find a teammate. Upfield from that blind throw is… ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2004, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/40 "2004-08-25T21:22:50Z")
Scoops up the pass from **Standup Karmic** and lobs it somewhere special. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687.md?page=3)