# Doperball II **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 20, 2004, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687 "2004-08-20T06:31:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/161 "2004-08-29T00:21:33Z")
: grabs the salad tongs and goes for the ball in **Standup Karmic** ’s pants : :eek: OOOOoooo…dude, that’s gotta hurt! : grabs the doperball and flings it, tongs and all : ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/162 "2004-08-29T00:28:24Z")
I’m like a dog…any attention is good attention. **Standup** thinks about chasing after the ball, but is hit with the realization that this is the _third_ time this week he’s had salad tongs in his pants. Of course, this time wasn’t at the Ponderosa salad bar nor with that weird girl from the mall. :heads off the field to go look for that weird girl from the mall ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/163 "2004-08-29T00:31:31Z")
Puts on the BIG mittens, and looks for **Harmless** Caught the ball, but what just hit me in the head? :dubious: Salad tongs? Salad tongs! Do I have **Karmic** cooties in my hair now? Shakes head vigorously. Throws the ball between the legs, while shaking out the cooties. ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/164 "2004-08-29T00:38:33Z")
Team 1 There ain’t nothing wrong with a canadian cootie. **Greenback** picks up the ball and boots it downfield. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/165 "2004-08-29T00:40:31Z")
Thanks a-mighty, **Greenback**! : turns and punts it too… : ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/166 "2004-08-29T00:45:37Z")
Freshly returned from hunting for the weird mall girl (and, after having remembered that 1) that mall girl’s name was Steve; 2) that he still owes her $50; and, 3) there’s a point deficit to be made up), **Standup** retrieves the ball punted by **harmless** , does some cool Harlem Globetrotters-like spins and such, and tosses is closer to the Team 2 net… ---
**Author:** ![Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/9dc877/32.png) [@Nightwatch\_Trailer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nightwatch_Trailer)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/167 "2004-08-29T00:49:19Z")
…only to be denied by **The Trailer**. After **Standup** ’s show of goofery (:D) I put on a true display of talent…until I drop the ball after bumping into… ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/168 "2004-08-29T00:50:56Z")
Oof! Watch yo’self, **Nightwatch Trailer**! : grabs the balls from butterfingers and spirals it down the field to… : ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/169 "2004-08-29T00:55:20Z")
team 1 **Greenback** takes the pass from team 2’s **harmless** and out of habit, runs the ball back to **harmless** and hands it over. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/170 "2004-08-29T00:57:41Z")
Merci, **Greenback** Who want it? ---
**Author:** ![picunurse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7bcc69/32.png) [@picunurse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picunurse)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/171 "2004-08-29T01:03:11Z")
Baby baby baby Let’s show that flat team who’s boss… Oh no!~ I forgot I’m wearing the girly shoes! Heels are stuck in the ground. Awck! here they come! DDD’s! heads up! [Pass] ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/172 "2004-08-29T01:05:32Z")
Oh, I most certainly would like that. **S/K** snags the ball right out of the air and spikes it at **Greenback** ’s head. Habit or no, they don’t need your help, **Greenback**. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/173 "2004-08-29T01:09:55Z")
: catches the hell out of that bounce! : Neener, neener, **Standup Karmic**. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/174 "2004-08-29T03:29:09Z")
[Groucho voice]I haven’t been in the habit since I met that young woman ready to enter the convent.[/voice] With an appreciative glance at **picunurse** ’s stilettos, **danceswithcats** snags a lateral from **harmless** , and leaping astride his atomic racing badger, carries the ball, along with the teal and lace **Team DDD Flag** towards the Team 1 end of the field. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/175 "2004-08-29T17:14:46Z")
**Team 2 D[sup]3[/sup]** Oooo…what a perfect time for me to wander back onto the field. I’ll just lay out some atomic racing badger chow, have **danceswithcats** ’s stallion scamper over my way, take the handoff and toss that sucker in for the score! \*\*\*Woohooo!!Gooooooooal!!! \*\*\* ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/176 "2004-08-29T21:09:30Z")
Team 1 Score (I think): Team 1: 3 Team 2: 5 **Greenback** takes the ball at midfield and, still holding the ball, starts protesting about how the team 2 DDD are wearing distracting, revealing uniforms. If they won’t cover themselves up, team 1 will also weal revealing uniforms and I know nobody wants that. Finished with his speech, **Greenback** takes the ball and passes it back rugby style to… ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/177 "2004-08-29T21:10:22Z")
Sorry, I went home for the weekend, and my e-mail wasn’t working. The score as I see it is **Team 1** : 2 **Team DDD** : 7 Ball is in the center! ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/178 "2004-08-29T21:11:36Z")
Sorry, I ment to type **Team 1** with 3. I thought **Team DDD** scored three times, but I’ll go back over it and make sure. ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/179 "2004-08-29T21:18:07Z")
Ah! I was right the first time! 2-7, **Team DDD**. Play on. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 29, 2004, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687/180 "2004-08-29T21:37:54Z")
Team 2 Picking off **Greenback** ’s toss, **Hal** realizes he has far to much to do today to be playing Doperball, so he gives the ball a chuck downfield and gets back to work. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-ii/260687.md?page=10)