# Doperball V--Man, I'm bored **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 2, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743 "2005-09-02T15:32:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/1 "2005-09-02T15:32:46Z")
I have nothing to do. In an effort to keep myself from falling asleep, I hereby begin the next game of Doperball! The rules, as previously posted by our illustrious **Hal Briston** … First, figure out what team you’re on. This is determined by the first letter in your username – Team 1: A B C G H I M N O S T U Y Team 2: D E F J K L P Q R V W X Z Once the game begins, the first person to post has the ball. You can do whatever you like with it, but you must end your post by passing the ball. The next poster is the person who caught the ball. If it’s a teammate, great. If not, oh well, the other team has control. IMPORTANT: When posting, you must either post the name of the person from whom you are getting the ball, or quote their post. This game creates a lot of cross-posting, so we need that quoting to follow who has legal possession of the ball. In order to score, three consecutive teammates must touch the ball. When the third person has the ball, they can either toss it into the goal for a point, or pass it off to (hopefully) another teammate. If you choose to pass, and a teammate gets it, they can either toss it in for two points or they can pass as well. If a teammate catches this pass, they must put it in the goal for three points. Be careful with all this extra-point passing however, because once you touch the ball you cannot touch it again until there is a score, or the opposing team gains control. Once you score, the ball is tossed back into the middle and we begin again. One other quick thing…if you’re one of the first people to post on a new page, please copy and paste the “Usernames beginning with…” team listings (it’s helpful to have it on each page, so you know who your teammates are). Game is to 11, must win by two. Let’s go, people. Keep me entertained. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/2 "2005-09-02T15:40:51Z")
\*\*snags ball from opposing team and runs a zig-zag path down the field, collapsing in a heap, but not before passing it … \*\* ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/3 "2005-09-02T15:42:59Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > \*\*snags ball from opposing team and runs a zig-zag path down the field, collapsing in a heap, but not before passing it … \*\* … to Candid, who pauses only to playfully pants the referee, before giving the ball a good spiral… ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/4 "2005-09-02T15:43:54Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > … to Candid, who pauses only to playfully pants the referee, before giving the ball a good spiral… I’m not wearing pants. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/5 "2005-09-02T15:46:26Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > I’m not wearing pants. 😉 Not anymore, anyway! _examines the confiscated cloth_ Skirt? Shorts? ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/6 "2005-09-02T15:55:53Z")
Can I disqualify you for molesting the ref? Probably not. It’s a part of Doperball tradition, after all. _le sigh_ Gimme my skirt back, and _game on!_ ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/7 "2005-09-02T16:01:16Z")
Perhaps there can be some sort of … trade. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/8 "2005-09-02T16:17:39Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > … to Candid, who pauses only to playfully pants the referee, before giving the ball a good spiral… …straight to **Hal**. He jukes left around a defender, shakes off three opposing team members looking for a gang tackle, and then trips over his own feet when he notices the pantsless **Draelin** back upfield. The impact of the fall causes him to lose the Doperball, but fortunately, it dribbles straight into the goal! Woohoo! First score! As is Doperball tradition, I hereby christen Team 1 _The Flying Apteryxs_! ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/9 "2005-09-02T16:20:17Z")
**bouv** snags the ball on the tip off and send it flying through the air to… ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/10 "2005-09-02T16:23:43Z")
Thanks to _Hal_, the score stands as following … The Flying Apteryxs: 1 Team 2: 0 Now the referee is going to look up the meaning of _apteryx_. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/11 "2005-09-02T16:29:53Z")
> [@bouv](#): > > **bouv** snags the ball on the tip off and send it flying through the air to… Teammate twicks, who’s so surprised to catch it she stops cold – thereby confusing the hell out of the opposing team. In a giddy Mary-Tyler-Moore-esque moment, she tosses the ball straight up, and when it comes down… ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/12 "2005-09-02T16:32:02Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > Teammate twicks, who’s so surprised to catch it she stops cold – thereby confusing the hell out of the opposing team. In a giddy Mary-Tyler-Moore-esque moment, she tosses the ball straight up, and when it comes down… …Candid, still haggling over the skirt, catches the ball, and steps over the line into the goal. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/13 "2005-09-02T16:33:49Z")
Wow, Team 2 apparently _sucks_. Score is 2-0! ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/14 "2005-09-02T16:36:49Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > …Candid, still haggling over the skirt, catches the ball, and steps over the line into the goal. …and **WhyNot** , the only team 2 member to bother to show up today, make a valiant grab at the ball, before tripping over her own feet as the ball sails to… ---
**Author:** ![bouv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bc8723/32.png) [@bouv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bouv)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/15 "2005-09-02T16:39:03Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > …and **WhyNot** , the only team 2 member to bother to show up today, make a valiant grab at the ball, before tripping over her own feet as the ball sails to… **bouv’s** more than capable hands. He runs towards the goal, but trips on a dead wombat, and is forced to toss the ball wildly in the air and hope for the best as he sees it fall into the hands of… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/16 "2005-09-02T16:40:12Z")
…twicks, who spins around and immediately tosses the ball in the general direction of … ---
**Author:** ![raz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@raz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raz)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/17 "2005-09-02T16:41:40Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > …and **WhyNot** , the only team 2 member to bother to show up today, make a valiant grab at the ball, before tripping over her own feet as the ball sails to… **Raz** , who shows up just in time to help out team 2! She heads towards the goal, but **WhyNot** , being the only other member on the team, isn’t much help. **Raz** is suddenly tackled from behind but manages to hurl the ball to… ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/18 "2005-09-02T16:44:31Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > …twicks, who spins around and immediately tosses the ball in the general direction of … (sorry **Raz** , not quick enough) Nabs the ball and tosses it towards **Raz** … ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/19 "2005-09-02T17:15:09Z")
The ref is going to lunch–anybody want something from Wendy’s? ---
**Author:** ![CandidGamera](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/candidgamera/32/2878_2.png) [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)\ **Post date:** [September 2, 2005, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/20 "2005-09-02T17:21:57Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > (sorry **Raz** , not quick enough) > > Nabs the ball and tosses it towards **Raz** … … and Candid gets in the way, casually tossing the ball away as he eyes WHyNot’s lower covering lecherously… And thanks for the offer, Ref - already had my Wendy’s combo for today! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743.md?page=2)