# Doperball V--Man, I'm bored **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 2, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743 "2005-09-02T15:32:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 31
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/601 "2005-09-07T20:33:38Z")
> [@Snakescatlady](#): > > **Snakescatlady** who throws herself, the ball, a cat, and two ham sammiches into the goal. I hardly think that counts. …does it? ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/602 "2005-09-07T20:34:19Z")
**Snakescatlady** , your post was a little late, but you can redeem yourself by catching and scoring now! ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/603 "2005-09-07T20:34:52Z")
Team 1 (Hairy A’s): A B C F G H I M N O T U Y Team 2 (Larruping Lemurs): D E J K L P Q R S V W X Z ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/604 "2005-09-07T20:36:15Z")
> [@Scott Plaid](#): > > Me, again. Boy, you really need more sleep. 😃 **Feydeau** grabs it in his sleep and tosses to… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/605 "2005-09-07T20:40:27Z")
_TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET_\* **twicks** gives an earsplitting blast on the mod whistle (who gave her a mod whistle) and declares the game over, a new game begun – and new teams. Starting NOW, the teams are rearranged according to number of syllables in the player’s username. We thus have: **The Evens** : Feydeau, honeydewgrrl, marque elf, PriceGuy, Scott Plaid, snakescatlady, twickster, et al. vs. **The Odds** : Enterprise, danceswithcats, gardentraveler, Sternvogel, et al. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/606 "2005-09-07T20:40:34Z")
No, I got the ball from **Scott** at 3;32, and nobody’s caught my subsequent pass yet. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/607 "2005-09-07T20:42:03Z")
Too bad, so sad, it’s a whole new ballgame. And with that, **twickster** hurls the whole new ball straight up in the air. When it comes down… ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/608 "2005-09-07T20:43:24Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > Too bad, so sad, it’s a whole new ballgame. > > And with that, **twickster** hurls the whole new ball straight up in the air. When it comes down… …penis ensues. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/609 "2005-09-07T20:49:09Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > We thus have: > > **The Evens** : Feydeau, honeydewgrrl, marque elf, PriceGuy, Scott Plaid, snakescatlady, twickster, et al. This isn’t going to work. I pronounce **honeydewgrrl** as a five-syllable word. > [@](#): > > vs. > **The Odds** : Enterprise, danceswithcats, gardentraveler, Sternvogel, et al. dan-ces-with-cats. Four syllables. Even. My easier-to-remember proposal: Names That Begin With Capital Letters ( **Sternvogel** , **Scott Plaid** , **Feydeau** , etc.) vs. small-letter preferrers ( **twickster** , **honeydewgrrl** , **gardentraveler** , and their ilk). ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/610 "2005-09-07T20:54:10Z")
> [@Sternvogel](#): > > This isn’t going to work. I pronounce **honeydewgrrl** as a five-syllable word. We’ll let her tell us how she pronounces it. > [@](#): > > dan-ces-with-cats. Four syllables. Even. Welcome to the _good_ team, **dances** , honey! Good try – but I’ve already hijacked the teams. You’ll have to plot your revenge for later. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/611 "2005-09-07T21:06:42Z")
Okay, I have the ball for the odd-syllable Doperballers, since nobody’s touched it since **twickster** ’s toss. Who wants to catch this pass? ---
**Author:** ![Enterprise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/76d3ee/32.png) [@Enterprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enterprise)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/612 "2005-09-07T21:14:01Z")
> [@Sternvogel](#): > > Okay, I have the ball for the odd-syllable Doperballers, since nobody’s touched it since **twickster** ’s toss. Who wants to catch this pass? I’ll catch it. We’ll show 'em odd-syllabelled…off goes the ball to… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/613 "2005-09-07T21:18:06Z")
> [@Enterprise](#): > > I’ll catch it. We’ll show 'em odd-syllabelled…off goes the ball to… **twickster** , who has to remember not to call herself **twicks** while suited up for play. (And who designed these '20s style bathing suits as appropriate Doper Ball Uniforms?) Yoo hoo! Any evens around? ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/614 "2005-09-07T21:20:20Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > **twickster** , who has to remember not to call herself **twicks** while suited up for play. (And who designed these '20s style bathing suits as appropriate Doper Ball Uniforms?) Yoo hoo! Any evens around? Right here. I look quite comical in my full body green and black striped bathing suit. I was just waiting to see what the consensus would be. I grab an old fashion leather helmet, and barrel down the line. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/615 "2005-09-07T21:28:09Z")
> [@Scott Plaid](#): > > Right here. I look quite comical in my full body green and black striped bathing suit. I was just waiting to see what the consensus would be. I grab an old fashion leather helmet, and barrel down the line. Consensus? It’s by fiat that **twickster** rules. Anyway, I grab the ball from erstwhile teammate **Scott Plaid** and hope an “oddie” is open. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/616 "2005-09-07T21:31:37Z")
> [@Sternvogel](#): > > Consensus? It’s by fiat that **twickster** rules. Anyway, I grab the ball from erstwhile teammate **Scott Plaid** and hope an “oddie” is open. Well, it seems to be the consensus that you’re gonna let me rule by fiat. 😃 **twickster** grabs the ball, spins around, tosses it blindly … and heads for home. See y’all later! Don’t get into any mischief while I’m off doing that IRL thang! ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/617 "2005-09-07T21:37:57Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > Well, it seems to be the consensus that you’re gonna let me rule by fiat. 😃 > > **twickster** grabs the ball, spins around, tosses it blindly … and heads for home. See y’all later! Don’t get into any mischief while I’m off doing that IRL thang! Hoping this is not a ruse, **Sternvogel** reclaims the ball and lobs it to… ---
**Author:** ![Enterprise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/76d3ee/32.png) [@Enterprise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enterprise)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/618 "2005-09-07T21:39:56Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > Well, it seems to be the consensus that you’re gonna let me rule by fiat. 😃 > > **twickster** grabs the ball, spins around, tosses it blindly … and heads for home. See y’all later! Don’t get into any mischief while I’m off doing that IRL thang! **Enterprise** makes large puppy eyes to try to get **twickster** to take him home with her, but failing that, catches the ball, deposits it gently on the ground, and goes to bed, it being well nigh midnight… ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/619 "2005-09-07T21:44:30Z")
> [@Enterprise](#): > > **Enterprise** makes large puppy eyes to try to get **twickster** to take him home with her, but failing that, catches the ball, deposits it gently on the ground, and goes to bed, it being well nigh midnight… …where it is picked up by **Hal** who tosses it to the other end of the field. He then tracks back a few posts, scratches his head trying to figure out the new team convention, realizes he’s an **Odd** , and boots the ball in for the score! ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [September 7, 2005, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/620 "2005-09-07T22:07:54Z")
> [@Hal Briston](#): > > …where it is picked up by **Hal** who tosses it to the other end of the field. He then tracks back a few posts, scratches his head trying to figure out the new team convention, realizes he’s an **Odd** , and boots the ball in for the score! **Score 1-0** for the **Odds** , yeehaw!!! Slightly disoriented by the new configuration of teams, **gardentraveler** attempts to return a certain formality to the game, takes the ball to the center line and athletically kicks the ball into play (I’m odd, I’m odd, I’m odd…by syllable-count only thanks)… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743.md?page=30) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743.md?page=32)