# Doperball V--Man, I'm bored **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 2, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743 "2005-09-02T15:32:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 41
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/801 "2005-09-10T16:38:21Z")
> [@danceswithcats](#): > > DAMMIT! No, DAMMIT didn’t pick it up, I was trumped out of a score by the dial-up trolls. So I’ll whack the glitterball down the street to… **twickster** , who’s just taking a break from cleaning the kitchen, really… ---
**Author:** ![EarthStone777](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@EarthStone777](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EarthStone777)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/802 "2005-09-10T17:27:42Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > **twickster** , who’s just taking a break from cleaning the kitchen, really… Well EarthStone777 is headed to the kitchen to make himself some lunch, so he carefully sets the ball on the counter while he opens the fridge to see what’s there. Unnoticed the ball rolls off the counter and bounces down the hall to… ---
**Author:** ![EarthStone777](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ab992/32.png) [@EarthStone777](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EarthStone777)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/803 "2005-09-10T17:30:23Z")
(Yes, I was the third even to touch it. No I did not score with it, I’m hungry damnit! Food first, score later.) ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/804 "2005-09-10T17:32:35Z")
> [@EarthStone777](#): > > (Yes, I was the third even to touch it. No I did not score with it, I’m hungry damnit! Food first, score later.) The delay costs the Evens a score because it gives **gardentraveler** just enough time to swoop by and get possession of the ball for the Odds… ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/805 "2005-09-10T17:35:05Z")
**TEAM CONFIGURATION REMINDER** It’s Odds vs. Evens based on the number of syllables in your screen name. If you’re just joining in, please say which team you’re on… And our current score is: **Evens: 9 Odds: 3** ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/806 "2005-09-10T18:56:31Z")
> [@gardentraveler](#): > > The delay costs the Evens a score because it gives **gardentraveler** just enough time to swoop by and get possession of the ball for the Odds… …but it’s stolen back by **twickster** , who’s taking another break because it’s really important to pace yourself while housecleaning. She sticks it over by the sweatshirt, the spool of ribbon, and the stack of books at the foot of the stairs awaiting her next trip up, and … ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/807 "2005-09-10T21:39:51Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > …but it’s stolen back by **twickster** , who’s taking another break because it’s really important to pace yourself while housecleaning. She sticks it over by the sweatshirt, the spool of ribbon, and the stack of books at the foot of the stairs awaiting her next trip up, and … **gardentraveler** stops by and removes it on her way to pick up in her own living room, when… ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/808 "2005-09-10T21:51:27Z")
> [@gardentraveler](#): > > **gardentraveler** stops by and removes it on her way to pick up in her own living room, when… **danceswithcats** decides to pick up something much less weighty than a living room, instead loading the doperball into an environmentally friendly hydrogen powered ball-shooter, and having pulled the trigger cord, a pleasant **BOOM** verifies the doper ball to be somewhere near Venus where it is found by… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/809 "2005-09-10T23:25:28Z")
> [@danceswithcats](#): > > **danceswithcats** decides to pick up something much less weighty than a living room, instead loading the doperball into an environmentally friendly hydrogen powered ball-shooter, and having pulled the trigger cord, a pleasant **BOOM** verifies the doper ball to be somewhere near Venus where it is found by… **twickster** , who’s actually looking for the cup hooks she bought a few days ago, so she tosses the ball away to keep looking… ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/810 "2005-09-10T23:39:18Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > **twickster** , who’s actually looking for the cup hooks she bought a few days ago, so she tosses the ball away to keep looking… apparently pretty extensively, since Venus seems like a kind of long way to go for cup hooks… 😃 Having hitched a ride on a local spacebus, **gardentraveler** stops by, hands **twicks** her lost cup hooks and takes the ball back onto the bus. They scoot on to… ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2005, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/811 "2005-09-10T23:51:53Z")
> [@gardentraveler](#): > > apparently pretty extensively, since Venus seems like a kind of long way to go for cup hooks… 😃 Having hitched a ride on a local spacebus, **gardentraveler** stops by, hands **twicks** her lost cup hooks and takes the ball back onto the bus. They scoot on to… **Feydeau** , who, in a muffled voice, yells “GET OFFA ME!!” They jump off, startled, and **Feydeau** grabs the ball and jumps onto the roof of the spacebus, headed for Jupiter, where… ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/812 "2005-09-11T00:05:35Z")
> [@Feydeau](#): > > **Feydeau** , who, in a muffled voice, yells “GET OFFA ME!!” > > They jump off, startled, and **Feydeau** grabs the ball and jumps onto the roof of the spacebus, headed for Jupiter, where… **twickster** , having safely stowed the cup hooks in her purse (thanks, **gardentraveler** – where the hell did I put them?), grabs the ball and hops back on the probe… ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/813 "2005-09-11T00:22:57Z")
> [@twickster](#): > > **twickster** , having safely stowed the cup hooks in her purse (thanks, **gardentraveler** – where the hell did I put them?), grabs the ball and hops back on the probe… And, looping around the curve, comes Lum’s spaceship. If I have read the names right, this sends the ball into the goal. If not, well… ---
**Author:** ![gardentraveler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gardentraveler/32/3576_2.png) [@gardentraveler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gardentraveler)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/814 "2005-09-11T00:26:11Z")
> [@Scott Plaid](#): > > And, looping around the curve, comes Lum’s spaceship. If I have read the names right, this sends the ball into the goal. > > If not, well… **gardentraveler** gives it the ol’ college try and hopes that the Odds can come up with at least one more goal before game end as the score is now 10-3, Evens. She lobs the ball to… ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/815 "2005-09-11T01:00:36Z")
> [@gardentraveler](#): > > **gardentraveler** gives it the ol’ college try and hopes that the Odds can come up with at least one more goal before game end as the score is now 10-3, Evens. She lobs the ball to… **danceswithcats** who hasn’t decided on a comic segue just yet, and so will merely staple the doperball to the mane of a passing yak, with a warning to stay upwind of what the yak is passing… ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/816 "2005-09-11T01:04:26Z")
> [@danceswithcats](#): > > **danceswithcats** who hasn’t decided on a comic segue just yet, and so will merely staple the doperball to the mane of a passing yak, with a warning to stay upwind of what the yak is passing… **Priceguy** catches the yak, shaves it, and grabs the ball as the yak is hiding its shame from the eyes of the Lord. ---
**Author:** ![Feydeau](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/df788c/32.png) [@Feydeau](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feydeau)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/817 "2005-09-11T01:08:59Z")
> [@Priceguy](#): > > **Priceguy** catches the yak, shaves it, and grabs the ball as the yak is hiding its shame from the eyes of the Lord. **Feydeau** grabs the ball, mounts the yak and rides off into the goal and the sunset! I think we won. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/818 "2005-09-11T01:10:12Z")
**joins in dance of joy (and yak BBQ)** ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/819 "2005-09-11T01:12:38Z")
> [@Feydeau](#): > > **Feydeau** grabs the ball, mounts the yak and rides off into the goal and the sunset! > > I think we won. **danceswithcats** urges the children to look at some watercolors, lest they see yak mounting. Let them wait until they’re at least 14 for such doings. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2005, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743/820 "2005-09-11T01:15:07Z")
**Sternvogel** was threatening to try to change the premise of the teams for the next game – but hell, he’s not here, and that odds/evens thing seems to be working really well … 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743.md?page=40) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-v-man-im-bored/319743.md?page=42)