# Doperball VI **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 5, 2007, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873 "2007-02-05T02:30:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/101 "2007-02-06T02:25:56Z")
But as **Hal** forgot to remove the RoboGoat, once the ball hits the ground, it resumed its march on the Quetzals’ goal… ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/102 "2007-02-06T02:26:59Z")
danceswithcats, who is just finishing a leftover Mudslide from Saturday’s soiree. Placing his glass on the sidelines, he raises a 1920’s Style jai-alai cesta-punta, snagging said ball from Hal Briston, and hurling it back upfield towards… ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/103 "2007-02-06T02:27:01Z")
Teams: > [@](#): > > Team 1: A B C G H I M N O S T U Y > Team 2: D E F J K L P Q R V W X Z ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/104 "2007-02-06T02:29:01Z")
Apparently late in postitude, danceswithcats accepts the RoboGoat pass from Rysto and trots downfield with the little cyber-fella towards… ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/105 "2007-02-06T03:22:34Z")
[QUOTE=danceswithcats] Apparently late in postitude, danceswithcats accepts the RoboGoat pass from Rysto and trots downfield with the little cyber-fella towards… [/QUOTE] … **Hal** , who maintains possession of the remote for the (what model are we up to now…must be eight or nine, I think) RoboGoat Mark VIII. Taking control of the metal beast, the RGMVIII snags the DoperBall in his toothy maw, and with a firey roar, sends it sailing over to… ---
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/106 "2007-02-06T03:40:24Z")
danceswithcats, who has worked with programming geeks in the far east to crack the language of RGMVIII and now has a pirated remote! Sending the beast turning on heel, he pushes “Mincemeat” on the remote, and watches as RoboGoat chases Hal Briston down field… ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/107 "2007-02-06T06:41:48Z")
[QUOTE=danceswithcats] danceswithcats, who has worked with programming geeks in the far east to crack the language of RGMVIII and now has a pirated remote! Sending the beast turning on heel, he pushes “Mincemeat” on the remote, and watches as RoboGoat chases Hal Briston down field… [/QUOTE] But then dark wizard **Priceguy** , disgusted with the use of modern technology, causes the RoboGoat to dissolve into faerie dust with a diabolical incantation. This leaves the ball and a frightened **Hal Briston** , whom **Priceguy** heartlessly slays with the Cursed Dagger of Kael. He then proceeds to surgically insert the ball into **Hal** ’s chest cavity and perform forbidden rituals to animate the deceased sheep-fancier. Now a mindless zombie, **Hal** starts lurching downfield with the ball in his body. While admiring his handiwork, **Priceguy** settles down with a Doperball rulebook to confirm that this counts as his own possession and not **Hal** ’s. ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/108 "2007-02-06T06:56:21Z")
**Rysto** reminds **Priceguy** that **Hal** was the only authoritative source of the rules of Doperball. While **Priceguy** ponders the dilemma, **Rysto** spins the zombie- **Hal** around, disorienting him and pointing him towards the Quetzals’ goal. ---
**Author:** ![Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silence_of_the_clams)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/109 "2007-02-06T10:55:29Z")
[QUOTE=Rysto] **Rysto** reminds **Priceguy** that **Hal** was the only authoritative source of the rules of Doperball. While **Priceguy** ponders the dilemma, **Rysto** spins the zombie- **Hal** around, disorienting him and pointing him towards the Quetzals’ goal. [/QUOTE] Seeing the zombie of **Hal** lurching past, **Kotick** wips out his butterfly-net and ushers the zombie into the goalzone. Since the ball is lodged in the chestcavity of the zombie, **Kotick** has to push the zombie over and repeatedly jump on the zombie in hope of a clean score for team 2. Exhausted from jumping he awaits the umpires judgement… ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 12:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/110 "2007-02-06T12:34:05Z")
I need to ask - **Rysto** , had you changed teams? you seem to be playing for the **JQ** s. and if that’s you’re intention, then **Kotick** ’s goal shouldn’t count ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/111 "2007-02-06T13:00:40Z")
[QUOTE=Hal Briston] …only to have it deftly blocked! **Hal** ties a couple of bungee cords betwixt some nearby trees, strrrrrrrrretches them back, drops the DoperBall in, and lets that sucker _fly_! It sails all the way downfield to… [/QUOTE] Rubystreak, who is stretching, wiping sleep from her eyes, only to find balls hurtling towards her face. Not that it’s an unusual occurrence 😃 But before they hit the bridge of her nose, she deftly deflects it into the hands of… ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/112 "2007-02-06T13:06:54Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] Rubystreak, who is stretching, wiping sleep from her eyes, only to find balls hurtling towards her face. Not that it’s an unusual occurrence 😃 But before they hit the bridge of her nose, she deftly deflects it into the hands of… [/QUOTE] EEEEEEEEEW!!! The icky ball touched me again! **swampbear** pops open another beer while kicking the icky ball and letting it roll… ---
**Author:** ![Strinka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/strinka/32/512_2.png) [@Strinka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strinka)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/113 "2007-02-06T14:35:35Z")
**Rubystreak** , others got that pass long before you, and **swampbear** , since **Rubystreak** never got the ball, neither did you. I’m ruling that **Kotick** _did_ get a goal, and worth two points since it went through four people on team 2. **Rysto** , you don’t get to switch teams without changing your name. **Kotik** , name your team. Score is 3 - 2 No one has the ball. ---
**Author:** ![Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Silence\_of\_the\_clams](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silence_of_the_clams)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/114 "2007-02-06T14:42:38Z")
[QUOTE=Strinka] **Rubystreak** , others got that pass long before you, and **swampbear** , since **Rubystreak** never got the ball, neither did you. I’m ruling that **Kotick** _did_ get a goal, and worth two points since it went through four people on team 2. **Rysto** , you don’t get to switch teams without changing your name. **Kotik** , name your team. Score is 3 - 2 No one has the ball. [/QUOTE] I will call team 2 “Team Lazy Explosion”. Game on! ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/115 "2007-02-06T14:45:24Z")
[QUOTE=Kotick] I will call team 2 “Team Lazy Explosion”. Game on! [/QUOTE] Quit throwing that icky ball at me! Nudges ball out of the way where… ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/116 "2007-02-06T20:41:53Z")
[QUOTE=swampbear] Quit throwing that icky ball at me! Nudges ball out of the way where… [/QUOTE] **Priceguy** , finally fed up with **swampbear** ’s cutesy overuse of the word “icky”, kicks it downfield and challenges the aforementioned bear to fisticuffs. Meanwhile, the ball spirals towards… ---
**Author:** ![Rubystreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Rubystreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rubystreak)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/117 "2007-02-06T21:15:24Z")
[QUOTE=Priceguy] **Priceguy** , finally fed up with **swampbear** ’s cutesy overuse of the word “icky”, kicks it downfield and challenges the aforementioned bear to fisticuffs. Meanwhile, the ball spirals towards… [/QUOTE] **Rubystreak** , who has no idea what the hell else has happened or how she screwed up, probably continues to screw up by passing the ball to… ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/118 "2007-02-06T21:20:50Z")
[QUOTE=Rubystreak] **Rubystreak** , who has no idea what the hell else has happened or how she screwed up, probably continues to screw up by passing the ball to… [/QUOTE] Captain Carrot, who proceeds to shove it into the chest of… ---
**Author:** ![Rysto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@Rysto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysto)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/119 "2007-02-06T21:41:01Z")
[QUOTE=Captain Carrot] Captain Carrot, who proceeds to shove it into the chest of… [/QUOTE] **Rysto** , who belatedly realizes that **Priceguy** is on his team :smack:. As he smacks himself on the forehead, he drops the ball, and it’s picked up by… ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f0a364/32.png) [@Captain\_Carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Carrot)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873/120 "2007-02-06T21:43:18Z")
[QUOTE=Rysto] **Rysto** , who belatedly realizes that **Priceguy** is on his team :smack:. As he smacks himself on the forehead, he drops the ball, and it’s picked up by… [/QUOTE] Captain Carrot again, who is constantly refreshing this thread, and drop-kicks the ball into the waiting embrace of… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperball-vi/390873.md?page=7)