# Dopers I'd like to meet (but probably won't) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 2, 2003, 10:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099 "2003-06-02T10:52:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Wintermute](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e19b73/32.png) [@Wintermute](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wintermute)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/121 "2003-06-06T13:53:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dantheman \* > \*\ ***slortar** , you gotta send lawyers, guns, and ninjas! \*\* **Dan** , _guns_?!? And after I clued you into the hydrocortisone. ::shakes head ruefully:: I’m just going to assume that you are cranky from your rash, and try to ignore the fact that you would conspire with my Mortal Enemy ™. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/122 "2003-06-06T13:59:50Z")
It’s okay, I’m paying **dantheman** scale to help me out. ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/123 "2003-06-06T14:03:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by garius \* > \*\*oh you talk BIG American. Lets see you step up to the table and prove it \*\* Listen up Brit boy, I’ll smack you down like the Redcoats in the Revoloutionary War. Then I’ll take your British Biscuits and feed them to the dogs. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/124 "2003-06-06T14:58:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Wintermute \* > \*\ ***Dan** , _guns_?!? And after I clued you into the hydrocortisone. ::shakes head ruefully:: I’m just going to assume that you are cranky from your rash, and try to ignore the fact that you would conspire with my Mortal Enemy ™. 😉 \*\* Nah, I was bastardizing a song by Warren Zevon: “Lawyers, guns, and money”. ---
**Author:** ![Wintermute](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e19b73/32.png) [@Wintermute](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wintermute)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/125 "2003-06-06T15:07:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dantheman \* > \*\*Nah, I was bastardizing a song by Warren Zevon: “Lawyers, guns, and money”. \*\* Oh, well in that case, all is forgiven\*! 🙂 (Sorry I didn’t catch the reference; I’m afraid I’m not very familiar with Warren Zevon) (\*Unless this is an evil scheme to get in my good graces so you can act as a mole for **Slortar** , who apparently has taken my suggestion and is looking for better help) ---
**Author:** ![Wintermute](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e19b73/32.png) [@Wintermute](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wintermute)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/126 "2003-06-06T15:09:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by slortar \* > \*\*It’s okay, I’m paying **dantheman** scale to help me out. \*\* Lucky for you the job market is so bad; you’ll actually be able to get competent henchmen, even though you’re only paying scale. ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/127 "2003-06-06T15:27:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by welby \* > \*\*Listen up Brit boy, I’ll smack you down like the Redcoats in the Revoloutionary War. Then I’ll take your British Biscuits and feed them to the dogs. 😃 \*\* Why you damned upstart colonial! I’ve got bloody _furniture_ older than that miserable thing you call a Republic! I’ve going to give you a bloody good thrashing and expose you for the cur that you are! I hereby challenge you to a duel sir! Tomorrow, dawn, Hounslow Heath. Bring a Ping-pong racket. **Bibliovore** , old chap, will you be my second? ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/128 "2003-06-06T15:27:49Z")
The Neglected Dopers club forms to the left. And don’t be giving us love because we mentioned we don’t get no love. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/129 "2003-06-06T15:31:45Z")
I’ve got underwear older than your furniture, suh! ---
**Author:** ![garius](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e19b73/32.png) [@garius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garius)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/130 "2003-06-06T15:38:53Z")
well that certainly explains your somewhat colourful odour, dear boy. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/131 "2003-06-06T15:47:16Z")
Silly empire! I don’t **wear** it! It’s part of my private classic underwear collection, soon to be seen on ebay. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/132 "2003-06-06T16:08:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mouthbreather \* > \*\*Well, since you seen to miss every AL and GA dopefest that I’ve been to, I didn’t want to meet you either, you jerkfaced jerk. \*\* Whoa. I missed another AL Dopefest? When was that? I thought the one planned for a couple months ago fell through. And GA Dopefests? I didn’t even know such things had been in the offing. So take that, you big poopyhead. ---
**Author:** ![g8rguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7cd45c/32.png) [@g8rguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/g8rguy)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/133 "2003-06-06T17:06:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by bittersweet \* > \*\*Also - any dopers from FL? > What about a FL doper-meeting type thing? \*\* By a curious coincidence, we are having a [DopeFest](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=177806) in Orlando next Sunday and another one further north the weekend after that… ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/134 "2003-06-06T18:17:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Ogre \* > \*\*Whoa. I missed another AL Dopefest? When was that? I thought the one planned for a couple months ago fell through. > > And GA Dopefests? I didn’t even know such things had been in the offing. > > So take that, you big poopyhead. \*\* Don’t know if there’s been a recent one. I was referring to the AL one that we went to 12 or 18 months ago. Also, I’ve met up with dopers in ATL on 4 or occasions, and nearly all (if not all) of them had corresponding MPSIMS threads. Dookie-breath. ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/135 "2003-06-06T18:46:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by garius \* > \*\*Why you damned upstart colonial! > > I’ve got bloody _furniture_ older than that miserable thing you call a Republic! > > I’ve going to give you a bloody good thrashing and expose you for the cur that you are! > > I hereby challenge you to a duel sir! Tomorrow, dawn, Hounslow Heath. > > Bring a Ping-pong racket. > **Bibliovore** , old chap, will you be my second? \*\* Colonial? COLONIAL! Look, just because your “soldiers” weren’t man enough to take us tough Americans is no reason to hold a 200 year grudge. Me whipping you in Ping-Pong is, though. I won’t need a second. It’s not like there’s a challenge awaiting me or anything. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Kilt-wearin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/82dd89/32.png) [@Kilt-wearin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilt-wearin_man)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2003, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/136 "2003-06-06T19:01:12Z")
See? I knew it. Nobody wants to meet me. You fear me. That must be it. ---
**Author:** ![Davebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Davebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Davebear)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2003, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/137 "2003-06-07T01:11:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Kilt-wearin’ man \* > \*\*You fear me. > \*\* Only when the wind is blowing. Some of really _don’t_ wanna know what you wear under than kilt. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2003, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/138 "2003-06-07T07:31:15Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by vivalostwages \* > \*\*Kn_ckers, NoClueBoy, tarragon918, Aesiron, Linus Van Pelt–and our gang in the ENT threads\*\* _ignoring the fact that he was named next to last_ An Enterprise Dope Fest would be the coolest thing ever. The people in those threads ( **Archernar** , **carnivorousplant** , **Cervaise** , **Kn\*ckers** , **Linus Van Pelt** , \*\*NoClueBoy \*\*, \*\*Tars Tarkas \*\*, \*\*tracer \*\*, **vivalostwages** , **Wearia** etc.) are the only Dopers I really, _ **really** _ want to meet. ---
**Author:** ![celestina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/258eb7/32.png) [@celestina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/celestina)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2003, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/139 "2003-06-07T07:51:37Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by vivalostwages \* > \*\*celestina, Manatee, pseudotriton ruber ruber (we’re all teachers); and Kn_ckers, NoClueBoy, tarragon918, Aesiron, Linus Van Pelt–and our gang in the ENT threads \*\* Hey, **vivalostwages** , I’d like to meet you and the rest of the Doper teachers too. We could sit and trade war stories over a few beers, or something stronger if y’all prefer. 😃 Gosh, there’s so many Dopers I’d like to meet that I can’t name them all here. I will say one that sticks out the most is **Unca Cecil**. [giggle] ---
**Author:** ![scotandrsn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a4c791/32.png) [@scotandrsn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scotandrsn)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2003, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099/140 "2003-06-07T07:56:02Z")
I want to meet the ones with my favorite screen names, the A-number-one being: **Satisfying Andy Licious** I also wouldn’t mind meeting **John Mace** because he’s the one conservative I seem to be able to carry on a semi-intelligent conversation with [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dopers-id-like-to-meet-but-probably-wont/179099.md?page=8)