# Doperville Mafia - New Players Welcome! **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [May 9, 2008, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670 "2008-05-09T07:23:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Koldanar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@Koldanar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koldanar)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/41 "2008-05-10T04:36:33Z")
[QUOTE=peekercpa] **Vote Collender**. OMGUS. Let’s get the newbs up to speed. [/QUOTE] **Peebuttcpa** , thats an awful move right there…motivation? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![peekercpa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8baadc/32.png) [@peekercpa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peekercpa)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/42 "2008-05-10T04:53:29Z")
Let’s play this flipper. Toss the dice and send the PM’s. ---
**Author:** ![bufftabby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/77aa72/32.png) [@bufftabby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bufftabby)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/43 "2008-05-10T05:45:21Z")
[QUOTE=peekercpa] But if we break your name down into something more recognizable it becomes **bat buffy B**. Scum tell out the wazoo. [/QUOTE] Heh, I like Koldanar’s **peebuttcpa** , but I’m gonna play _your_ letter game, **peepacker**! 😃 **Koldanar** , what kind of sick bastard would allow “pee” and “butt” to be used so close together in a sentence?! If you don’t watch out, the two might form some sort of union, and that would be AWFUL and DISGUSTING, just like anyone who would mention such a thing. Sheesh. Some people… ---
**Author:** ![Amblydoper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@Amblydoper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amblydoper)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/44 "2008-05-10T06:49:13Z")
The Player List **anyrose Zsofia peekercpa Thing Fish Oredigger77 bufftabby cckerberos twickster RyJae The Unkempt One Hoopy Frood fluiddruid Koldanar Blaster Master** The Substitute List (still room for more) **dotchan** Rules 1. The game will begin in the Day Phase. All players will discuss and decide upon a suspect to lynch, by voting. A player will be lynched if they have a plurality when the deadline is reached. In the event of a tie, the moderator will decide on a victim at random. 2. After the deadline, no additional vote changes will count. I will post the official outcome of the day, and the Night Phase will begin immediately. No game related chat is allowed in the thread during the Night Phase. 3. During the Night Phase, players that have a Night Role, including the mafia, will send the name of their target to the moderator. If the Night Phase deadline is reached before a name is submitted, the moderator will assume that the choice is “No Target.” In the case of the mafia, this means that no kill will be made that night. 4. The Day Phase will begin after a post from the moderator to announce any deaths that occurred during the night. The Day Phase will continue as before, until the deadline. 5. **Players are not allowed to discuss the game outside of the thread.** Only members of the mafia are allowed to discuss the game during the Night Phase. A secret Mafia only forum will be provided for that. Posting from non-playing people is discouraged. Dead players may post a farewell, but nothing else. 6. Active participation is required. Inactive players may be prodded by email or PM at the request of any other player. Failure to respond to this prod will result in replacement. Players may request a replacement if they can’t commit to the game. Deadlines may be extended while the replacement reads the thread and catches up. 7. Do not quote your role assignments in the thread. You may paraphrase, though. Please vote like this, in **bold** and blue color, on a line all by itself. **Vote PlayerName** Please unvote the same way, but in red. **Unvote PlayerName** **Messages to the moderator should be in green, or sent by PM.**. The Game will begin as soon as all players have confirmed their role assignments Good Luck, and Happy Killing! ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/45 "2008-05-10T07:01:36Z")
[QUOTE=peekercpa] And to expand on what **Koldenar** said. There are also **smudges** and **snuggles** (patent pending). **BlasterMaster** : Is that gonna be a per use fee or just some sort of lifetime payment? [/QUOTE] I’ll only ask for a 1 time payment of your eternal soul. BTW, I believe **capybara** as the copyright on smudge so, you’ll need to talk to her about that one. ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/46 "2008-05-10T07:05:15Z")
Oh boy, I’m on when the game starts… I’m going to begin with a random vote: Vote **Koldanar** ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/47 "2008-05-10T07:23:37Z")
Let us also start with some theorizing. There’s 14 people in the game. So I’d estimate about 4 scum would be balanced, 3 is possible but unlikely, and 5 is just too many. I would also consider it likely that there is a Doctor, Detective, and group of Masons, but as it’s closed, I wouldn’t consider any of those as a given, only likely. So, my guess… 4 Scum (no Godfather), 1 Detective, 1 Doctor, 2 Masons, 6 Vanilla Townies or 4 Scum (with Godfather), 1 Detective, 1 Doctor, 3 Masons, 5 Vanilla Townies Both are intuitively well balanced and perfectly balanced according to **JSexton** ’s Formula (18:18 for the first and 20.5:20.5 for the second). ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/48 "2008-05-10T07:25:00Z")
Oops… I realized I started a LITTLE too fast, I saw the post and just wanted to get cranking… sorry guys. ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/49 "2008-05-10T07:26:29Z")
Erm, that said, just to reduce any confusion, I’ll unvote just to make sure it’s clear when it does start so no one gets confused. :smack: Unvote **Koldanar** ---
**Author:** ![Amblydoper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@Amblydoper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amblydoper)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/50 "2008-05-10T07:38:50Z")
Role assignments have been sent. Just so you all know here is the Townie Role PM. PlayerName Townie You are a Townie. You were pissed when you found that someone broke in to the bakery and stole all the pies. You were enraged when they killed Cecil Adams. Now, you must bring justice to the killers, by voting to lynch suspicious town members. Be careful with this power. Once the deadline is reached, the player with the most votes will be killed. You may not discuss the game outside of the Game Thread. You will win when you and the other townies have killed every member of the Mafia. You win as a team, even if you are dead. ---
**Author:** ![Amblydoper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/fbc32d/32.png) [@Amblydoper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amblydoper)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/51 "2008-05-10T07:45:43Z")
Welcome to Doperville, a small village of 14 people on the east bank of the Squid River. The town is normally quite peaceful, but lately, disturbing events and rumors of evil have been defiling this innocent place. The most horrible event of late is the mysterious death of one \*\* Cecil Adams \*\*, the town know-it-all. Yesterday at a town meeting, called to discuss the recent break-in at the town bakery, Cecil boasted with haughty confidence that he suspected a few devious Dopers. The furious mob demanded proof. “Cite, Cite!” they chanted, urging Cecil to reveal his source of information. Cecil requested one night of investigation before he revealed the names of the suspects, fearing that this angry mob would take matters into their own hands, and lynch anyone he mentioned. “Cecil is never wrong,” announced an anonymous doper from the crowd, “He will provide us with names in the morning!” “And they will hang!” cried another Doper, “And we will throw their corpses to the man-eating squids in the river!” The crowd howled with morbid delight, as bloodlust filled the hall. Satisfied with their macabre plan of justice, the meeting moved to the tavern, across the street. The bartender poured pints of ale and shots of bourbon, and the people slowly forgot all their troubles. Stealthily, Cecil slipped out and prepared for his night of surveillance. As the morning light came, the hung-over Dopers staggered out of their homes and gathered in the town square. Cecil’s disfigured body leaned against the trunk of an oak tree, surrounded by a puddle of dry, sticky blood. The Dopers held a moment of silence for their beloved master, and then sat town to decide who was responsible. * * * You, as the surviving town members, must decide whom to hold accountable for this hideous crime. There are killers amongst you, and they will likely try to shift blame onto the innocents, to save themselves. The town must decide democratically who to lynch, before the end of the day. One Doper will be lynched each day, and after their death, their alignment will be revealed. As darkness sets over the town, each doper will retire to their own home, and will not discuss the matter further, until morning. The killers will likely take another victim during the night. You will then decide on the next suspect to lynch. This will continue until all the killers have been dealt with, or the deaths of innocents leave the killers in the majority, and eradicate everyone. * * * The game officially starts when everyone has confirmed. ---
**Author:** ![peekercpa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8baadc/32.png) [@peekercpa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peekercpa)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/52 "2008-05-10T10:58:08Z")
C’mon guys, it’s been like three hours already. Let’s get on with the neck stretching portion of the game. ---
**Author:** ![peekercpa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8baadc/32.png) [@peekercpa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peekercpa)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/53 "2008-05-10T11:29:06Z")
[QUOTE=Koldanar] **Peebuttcpa** , thats an awful move right there…motivation? 🙂 [/QUOTE] Follow **my** logic and all will be clear my friend. A collender is typically used to drain noodles Italians eat a lot of noodles Mafia (scum) are traditionally Italian **Koldanar** versus **Collender**. Cripes they sound almost exactly the same. 'Nuff said methinks **capybara** gets credit for smudge - **BlasterMaster** gets credit for snuggle and **I** will go down in history with the Noodle Gambit. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/54 "2008-05-10T13:17:53Z")
Confirm! Confirm! I am so freaking excited to play, so would the rest of you just _get on it_? ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/55 "2008-05-10T13:38:02Z")
[QUOTE=Koldanar] Arrrg! Why is my name so hard to get ☹ It’s a simple, easy to remember dwarf name people, come on! (lots on the off board game were misspelling during play…thats where the vehemence comes from) [/QUOTE] You do realize, of course, that pointing this fact out means that we all are going to start intentionally slaughtering your name now, don’t you Cold Dinner? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Unkempt\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b782af/32.png) [@The\_Unkempt\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Unkempt_One)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 2:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/56 "2008-05-10T14:15:40Z")
I’m here! Let’s get this thing started! ---
**Author:** ![peekercpa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8baadc/32.png) [@peekercpa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peekercpa)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/57 "2008-05-10T14:19:55Z")
[QUOTE=Hoopy Frood] You do realize, of course, that pointing this fact out means that we all are going to start intentionally slaughtering your name now, don’t you Cold Dinner? [/QUOTE] I think the official reply should have been more along the lines of **Colddinner**. Just so it jumps off the page a little more, you know. Made me chuckle none the less just not to the extent of **BlasterMaster** ’s Al Gore comment. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/58 "2008-05-10T15:10:26Z")
Okay – I’m here. I’ll stand over here with all the other newbies while the veterans trade in jokes. God, it’s like the first day of junior high, only worse, because there’s a killer among us. Wait – adolescent girls vs. mafia scum … let me think about this for a while. ---
**Author:** ![RyJae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9d8465/32.png) [@RyJae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RyJae)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/59 "2008-05-10T15:10:55Z")
Does this mean Cecil won’t be answering the plane on treadmill question I sent him? ☹ On with the game, or game on! I am sick of losing. (2 games in, 2 losses, I suck) I’ll get this ball rolling by throwing a totally random thought out, cold pizza rules! \*game didn’t actually start yet or did it? ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2008, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670/60 "2008-05-10T15:17:53Z")
::rubbing my eyes as I stumble around in search of caffeine:: I can’t think yet. I need coffee. You know, **Zsofia** ’s name _sounds_ italian. But if you want to play logic games then **RyJae** has “rye” at the beginning. Rye is a type of bread that the bakery sold Therefore **RyJae** stole the pies and killed Cecil or not I have to visit my sister in Shelbyville today. I may be back later, I may not be back until tomorrow. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/doperville-mafia-new-players-welcome/448670.md?page=4)