# Dorky Things Your Date/SO Has Said To Try to Seduce You **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 29, 2007, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387 "2007-08-29T17:59:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Susie\_Derkins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47774/32.png) [@Susie\_Derkins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susie_Derkins)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/41 "2007-08-30T15:00:43Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] Yeah, I got it the first time. It made me wonder whether or not you are supposed to breathe through your mouth. :o :dubious: [/QUOTE] Shit, you think I let the dude suck on my schnoz long enough to have a need to draw air? šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/42 "2007-08-30T15:08:23Z")
[QUOTE=Susie Derkins] Shit, you think I let the dude suck on my schnoz long enough to have a need to draw air? šŸ˜‰ [/QUOTE] Itā€™s not what I think that matters, itā€™s what he thought. Was there supposed to be a whole night of this sort of thing? Having said that, Iā€™ve been on both the giving and receiving end of a little nose licking. But my thoughts at the time were not so much ā€œooh, baby, you do me so fine!ā€ as much as ā€œWTF?!?ā€ ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/43 "2007-08-30T15:13:42Z")
[QUOTE=lisacurl] I once jokingly leered at him, ā€œHey baby. Wanna lock the cats out of the bedroom?ā€ [/QUOTE] Thatā€™s funny, in a strange kind of way. 'im indoors cannot imagine _any_ kind of romantic goings on if he thinks either of the cats might be watching. ---
**Author:** ![Solfy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Solfy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Solfy)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/44 "2007-08-30T16:17:21Z")
Necking in the back seat of a car, I was enticed with ā€œI just want to feel closer to you - I wonā€™t move it around or anything.ā€ To which I replied, ā€œWhat the hell kind of fun is that?!ā€ He didnā€™t get any closer. And not just because the cops showed up. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/45 "2007-08-30T17:12:10Z")
> [@](#): > > Mehā€¦not impressed..I met Jethro Tull,heā€™s neat. Hah. Iā€™ve met Beatle. Seriously, at some dopefests in Houston. He was there. ---
**Author:** ![Madd\_Maxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Madd\_Maxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madd_Maxx)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/46 "2007-08-30T17:31:22Z")
ā€œHey, youā€™re naked. Want me to lock the door?ā€ Does it everytime. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/47 "2007-08-30T17:45:17Z")
> [@](#): > > Thatā€™s funny, in a strange kind of way. 'im indoors cannot imagine _any_ kind of romantic goings on if he thinks either of the cats might be watching. Yeah, we got along all right with the cat around at first. But the other day we were getting into it and the cat came up and started licking me. It was hilarious, but didnā€™t do much for the mood. Now we put him out. ---
**Author:** ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/48 "2007-08-30T18:06:14Z")
[QUOTE=ScareyFaerie] Thatā€™s funny, in a strange kind of way. 'im indoors cannot imagine _any_ kind of romantic goings on if he thinks either of the cats might be watching. [/QUOTE] They usually stay out of the way, but they have interrupted goings-on more than once. Their intently quizzical looks tend to make me laugh hysterically, so itā€™s best they be kept outside the boudoir. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/49 "2007-08-30T18:15:41Z")
[QUOTE=lisacurl] They usually stay out of the way, but they have interrupted goings-on more than once. Their intently quizzical looks tend to make me laugh hysterically, so itā€™s best they be kept outside the boudoir. [/QUOTE] I once dated a woman who had never experienced the Big O. She was sure that if she tried a vibrator, that would do it. It took a while to convince her to actually buy one, but eventually she did. So we took it home and she started getting busy with it. She was in the throes of ā€œhalfway thereā€ when she looked up. Me and both her cats were all just staring at her. And not at her face. The looks on the catsā€™ faces was pureā€¦ astonishment. The vibrator never saw use again. ---
**Author:** ![dnooman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/839c29/32.png) [@dnooman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dnooman)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/50 "2007-08-30T18:18:59Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] ā€œDonā€™t make love to my body. Make love to my brain.ā€ No, I was not about to pull out one of her eyeballs, thank you. [/QUOTE] Good thing you werenā€™t. Congress is about to pass a bill that would impose heavy penalties on skull fucking. [http://www.theonion.com](http://www.theonion.com) /content/video/live\_from\_congress\_the\_skull?utm\_source=videomrss\_65839 I broke the link because the audio is VERY NSFW. No NSFW graphics though. Just remove the space in between .com and the / to make it work. Watch it. It is fucking hilarious. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/51 "2007-08-30T19:35:26Z")
[QUOTE=lisacurl] They usually stay out of the way, but they have interrupted goings-on more than once. Their intently quizzical looks tend to make me laugh hysterically, so itā€™s best they be kept outside the boudoir. [/QUOTE] Ours just think itā€™s lovely that weā€™re both in bed, and this is a signal for cat-snuggle time. So they jump up, try to cuddle us, and purr. And get thrown off with varying degrees of force. Locking them out would involve dragging them out from under the far corner of the bed. We canā€™t win. ---
**Author:** ![dangermom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e274bd/32.png) [@dangermom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dangermom)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/52 "2007-08-30T19:38:00Z")
I once dated a guy for a short time when I was about 17, and on about the second dateā€“possible the firstā€“he told me with a straight face that if I really loved him I would sleep with him. I didnā€™t want to hurt his feelings so I didnā€™t laugh, but I probably should have. Uh, no, as a matter of fact I donā€™t love you, I barely know you! And isnā€™t that line a little tired? ---
**Author:** ![zeldarae](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/f14d63/32.png) [@zeldarae](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zeldarae)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/53 "2007-08-30T21:49:53Z")
My dad to my mom (with all intentions of being sweet) - ā€œYou look good in the dark.ā€ I guy I once dated walked up to me in the quad right after I had just met him and asked, ā€œHey beautiful, buy yaā€™ a Big Mac?ā€ He later admitted he couldnā€™t remember my name at the time. Hubby now thinks its the height of funny seduction to ask, ā€œYou wouldnā€™t be interested in giving me a blowjob, would you?ā€ and does his puppy dog eyed thing. Itā€™s actually gotten to be kind of cute over the years. ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2007, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/54 "2007-08-30T22:47:16Z")
[QUOTE=SmartAleq] Dude, that would SO work on meā€“and Iā€™m a chick! šŸ˜ƒ Well, it would if she were a petite brunetteā€¦ with a landing stripā€¦ [/QUOTE] Well then, 2 out of 3 ainā€™t badā€¦ šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Random](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/57b2e6/32.png) [@Random](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Random)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2007, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/55 "2007-08-31T06:03:12Z")
> [@dmooman](#): > > Good thing you werenā€™t. Congress is about to pass a bill that would impose heavy penalties on skull fucking. > > [http://www.theonion.com](http://www.theonion.com) /content/video/live\_from\_congress\_the\_skull?utm\_source=videomrss\_65839. > > Watch it. It is fucking hilarious. Not bad. I liked the one about the panda who wants an abortion even better, though. ---
**Author:** ![scareyfaerie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scareyfaerie/32/3135_2.png) [@scareyfaerie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scareyfaerie)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2007, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/56 "2007-08-31T08:20:42Z")
[QUOTE=Lissla Lissar] Ours just think itā€™s lovely that weā€™re both in bed, and this is a signal for cat-snuggle time. So they jump up, try to cuddle us, and purr. [/QUOTE] Hijacking slightlyā€¦our cat, [Orly](http://mups.fotki.com/orly/smallorly.html) used to make sure she slept between the two of us as often as she could. That way she would be preventing the appearance of kittens. Obviously, she must have missed a night because [Ophelia](http://mups.fotki.com/ophelia/ophelia.html) turned up about three years ago. ---
**Author:** ![dnooman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/839c29/32.png) [@dnooman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dnooman)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2007, 8:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/57 "2007-08-31T08:34:27Z")
[QUOTE=Random] Not bad. I liked the one about the panda who wants an abortion even better, though. [/QUOTE] As long as I know Iā€™m not just talking to myself, Iā€™ll be ok. Iā€™ve yet to see the panda one, but Iā€™ll look for it next time Iā€™m on. ---
**Author:** ![Time\_Like\_Tears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/df705f/32.png) [@Time\_Like\_Tears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Time_Like_Tears)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2007, 8:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/58 "2007-08-31T08:54:49Z")
ā€œI know you want toā€¦because Iā€™m Mentok, the Mind Taker!ā€ Well, even though I did want to, that killed it for the time it took me to stop laughing. ---
**Author:** ![Khampelf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Khampelf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khampelf)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2007, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/59 "2007-08-31T14:22:21Z")
This oneā€™s on me. I once threw the covers back, and commanded, in a deep, Conan the Barbarian voice: ā€œFeast upon me, Woman! For I am swollen with seed!ā€ It worked, but I havenā€™t used it since. Itā€™s good ta be da King. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2007, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387/60 "2007-09-01T14:47:29Z")
As soon as this came out of my mouth, I knew I had to post it here: ā€˜ā€˜My vagina would like to subscribe to your newsletter.ā€™ā€™ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dorky-things-your-date-so-has-said-to-try-to-seduce-you/417387.md?page=4)