# Double dactyls **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 13, 1999, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048 "1999-11-13T13:09:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 1999, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/1 "1999-11-13T13:09:00Z")
Higgledy piggledy, Haikus are simply the Poems that require the least Effort to write. So I propose a test: Witness my grand behest! A Double-dactylic Poetry fight! Higgledy Piggledy, Frankly it seems to me Most folks know in what form These poems come. If you don’t know this, then Quite simply check this scan: Dum-da-da-Dum-da-da Dum-da-da-Dum. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 1999, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/2 "1999-11-13T13:20:00Z")
Here’s a few samples to get the ball rolling. (I didn’t write these.) Higgeldy piggeldy, President Jefferson Gave up the ghost on the Fourth of July. So did John Adams, which Shows that such patriots Propagandistically Know how to die. * * * Higgamus Hoggamus “Anton Von Leewenhoek Has a small problem,” con- Fided his wife. “Microbiology Doesn’t disturb me; his Microanatomy’s Blighting my life!” * * * Higgelvich Piggelvich Anna Karenina Russian romanticist cracked under strain: impetuosity caused her to tragically, melodramatically catch the next train. * * * And one of mine: this will only make sense to those who follow Canadian political scandals. Peppergate Peppergate, APEC notes demonstrate Parliament Hill is the Party at fault; Still, the PM and Sol- Icitor General Claim they’re not guilty of Pepper assault. (Of course I wrote this in 1997 or 1998, when Andy Scott was still the Solicitor General.) ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 1999, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/3 "1999-11-14T05:09:00Z")
I’m buoying this thread in the hopes that someone sees it. ---
**Author:** ![Catrandom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@Catrandom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catrandom)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 1999, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/4 "1999-11-14T07:10:00Z")
Poems anatomical, Dopers poetical, Are in the gender- specifical threads So, keeping it cleanish (instead of obscenish) Because matt is lonely, I’ll post here instead Catrandom ---
**Author:** ![Gaudere](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e495f1/32.png) [@Gaudere](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gaudere)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 1999, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/5 "1999-11-14T08:26:00Z")
Surely there’s people who Know what there is to do Far better than I since I’m drunk off my ass Certainly poetry Has some appeal for me Though I am a poster Who’s lacking in class These double-ish dactyls Remind me of fractals Quite pretty to look at But a pain in the ass I like ‘em, goddammit But I fear I would sham it Since I can’t contribute I fear I must pass ---
**Author:** ![Gaudere](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e495f1/32.png) [@Gaudere](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gaudere)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 1999, 8:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/6 "1999-11-14T08:39:00Z")
My meter’s capricious Though I’m quite delicious I tried all my hardest As best as I could I know that I failed, hell, At least I sure meant well And Matt will sure laugh hard And well that he should ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 1999, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/7 "1999-11-14T17:33:00Z")
Higgledy Piggledy, Random and Gaudere Wrote lots of poems a- Musing and quaint, Sparkling and witty and They made me laugh, although True double dactyls they Certainly ain’t. let’s get topical! Higgledy Piggledy, Breaking up Microsoft Is what poor Billy Gates Now has to fear. Looks like he’ll only make Hundreds of millions, not Ten to the power of Twelve every year. Higgledy Piggledy, Adrienne Clarkson’s our Governor General In Rideau Hall. If you don’t think she’s in- Sightful politically, Hey, she _is_ married to John Ralston Saul. ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 1999, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/8 "1999-11-14T19:47:00Z")
These aren’t original; just old ones from my bag o’ tricks: Tiddely Quiddely Edward M. Kennedy Quite unaccountably Drove in a stream. Pleas of amnesia Incomprehensible Possibly shattered Political dream. Chivalry, Schmivalry! Roger the thief has a method he uses for sneaky attacks: Folks who are reading are Characteristically Always forgetting to Guard their own bac … ---
**Author:** ![BurnMeUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@BurnMeUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BurnMeUp)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 1999, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/9 "1999-11-14T20:04:00Z")
Okily Dokily Would say Ned Flanders as Simpson (that’s Homer) Would tell him to leave I that this isn’t too Sad or contemptable Pop culture is something That leaks from my brain * * * Magnificent to behold - Greatly to be praised. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Angel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d26b3c/32.png) [@Johnny\_Angel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Angel)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 1999, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/10 "1999-11-16T05:41:00Z")
Jimminy Crimminy! How could a dactyl be So entertaining when Nobody’s posting them? Maybe the problem is Nobody’s meter is Quite up to speed or that Doubling dactyls is Unsatisfactual, Awkward, uncomical, Headache inducible, God-let-it-end-ical, Numbing to brain tissue, Oh, let it die, will you? ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 1999, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/11 "1999-11-16T05:56:00Z")
Higgledy pigglede- piggledepiggledy, Johnny, you need to take Some other tack: For the last line you need Use but one anapest, Then a spondee, and then **stop** , _tabernac!_ ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 1999, 6:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/12 "1999-11-16T06:00:00Z")
_Morès o tempora_! Here a bewailment of Current poetical Manners and times; Anapests swarm throughout These double dactyls, but Utterly innocent Of any rhymes. ---
**Author:** ![Catrandom](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7bcc69/32.png) [@Catrandom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catrandom)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 1999, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/13 "1999-11-16T06:02:00Z")
Higgledy-pigglement Why do I experiment When matthew my inexpert Meter steps on? 'Cause no one will see this, It beats watching Regis, And football is over – There’s nothing else on! Catrandom ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 1999, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/14 "1999-11-16T06:06:00Z")
Higgledè piggledè, I feel stùpid todày, It would sèem I got mý Feet mixed ùp in my hèad; In the vèrses I wròte Only jùst now abòve, Please read dàctyl for àn- Apest. Ì’m goin’ to bèd. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 1999, 6:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/double-dactyls/11048/15 "1999-11-16T06:10:00Z")
Higgledy piggledy, Plainly for all to see, Opened my mouth I, and Inserted my shoe; Late 'tis, fatigue set in; I’m in a state of sin. Please, o Catrandom, please Pardon me, do.