# Douchebag songs **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 16, 2010, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241 "2010-01-16T22:03:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/41 "2010-01-18T19:52:14Z")
Oops! Apologies to \*\*JXJohns \*\*and his link. Rollin wins simply by having Stephen Dorff in it. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/42 "2010-01-18T19:52:37Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Guys, common. How many posts before someone has to mention [Limp Bizkit](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpUYjpKg9KY)?! 1. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/43 "2010-01-18T20:29:37Z")
> [@jjimm](#): > > 1. Yeah..I caught that. I still think it’s too many. ---
**Author:** ![Lethal\_Babydoll](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@Lethal\_Babydoll](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lethal_Babydoll)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2010, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/44 "2010-01-18T22:23:54Z")
\*\*“Baby, Don’t Get Hooked On Me” \*\*by Mac Davis He’s a sweet guy letting her know that “I’ll just use you and I’ll set you free.” And, “Don’t start clinging to me, girl, cause I can’t breathe.” ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/45 "2010-01-19T01:31:58Z")
I’d nominate Lou Christie’s _Lightning Strikes_. It’s basic message is this: “I really dig you baby. When I’m ready to settle down to just one girl, I swear you’ll be the one. But until then, you just be faithful to me, and I’ll screw whoever I want to, and then I’ll marry you and it’ll all be fine. . .” Oh. And everything by Gary Puckett and the Union Gap. ---
**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/46 "2010-01-19T05:35:34Z")
> [@Sidney Evgeni Jordan](#): > > Ouch. [Here is my nomination](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fl6BiileOrg) It was bad… then he poked the “camera” and I thought “wow, this dude’s a real douche.” Then his tattoos flew off in a shower of light. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/47 "2010-01-19T17:32:25Z")
Nickelback cannot possibly be surpassed in terms of douchebaggery. I had a lengthy discussion about this just the other day. It’s not that their music is any worse than the other faux rock bands out there. It’s that every single song sounds like it was written by a fourteen year old. But since we’re all in agreement about them, let me dredge up [this little number](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DdCoNbbRvQ) by **Robin Thicke**. In case you were struck dumb by the smarminess, [here](http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/r/robin_thicke/lost_without_you.html) are the douchiforous lyrics. There should also be some kind of award for [this turd](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UJ6pLKlU-8Q) by Buckcherry (careful if you’re at work - there is much screaming about a “crazy bitch”). ---
**Author:** ![LiveOnAPlane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3d9bf3/32.png) [@LiveOnAPlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LiveOnAPlane)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/48 "2010-01-19T17:43:43Z")
> [@TreacherousCretin](#): > > What about that 60’s song “Take A Letter, Maria; Address it to my wife.” > . Not a bad ante to the OP, but I’ll see that and raise you “Billy Don’t Be A Hero” for sheer douchiness. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/49 "2010-01-19T23:28:22Z")
> [@JXJohns](#): > > I’ll raise you [this](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYnFIRc0k6E) this for the win: [Full house…](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OrNS2zbTZg) ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/50 "2010-01-19T23:34:11Z")
And just in case you haven’t had enough… [BOOM!!!](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYHA_7vxrgc) ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2010, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/51 "2010-01-19T23:57:44Z")
> [@Skylark](#): > > Apparently all of us who survived the late nineties were douchebags\*. Yikes. 1996-2000 was a troubled time for rock music. I think apparently it was just Nu-Metal is the culprit. Bummer. Anyways, here is my nomination, trump it if you can. [Popozao](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=laynXVsBulg) A song so douchy that it killed a career simply by being leaked online before a music video was ever really made for it. With just some of the lyrics below: \*In Portugese it means “bring your ass”, on the floor, and move it real fast. I want to see your kitty and a little bit of titty– want to know where I go when I’m your city? \* Honestly. Just think about that LYRICAL bit right there (my personal fav. line): "_In Portuguese it means “bring your ass”_ :smack: The man’s a misunderstood poet! Why couldn’t anyone see his message?! ---
**Author:** ![JXJohns](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jxjohns/32/469_2.png) [@JXJohns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JXJohns)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2010, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/52 "2010-01-20T02:09:00Z")
> [@Sidney Evgeni Jordan](#): > > Ouch. [Here is my nomination](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fl6BiileOrg) > [@TreacherousCretin](#): > > What about that 60’s song “Take A Letter, Maria; Address it to my wife.” > . I also agree that the guy in the song handled the situation quite well. ---
**Author:** ![C.Montgomery\_Burns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecd19e/32.png) [@C.Montgomery\_Burns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C.Montgomery_Burns)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2010, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/53 "2010-01-20T02:46:45Z")
Chicago - “Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?” Will you please just tell me what time it is when I ask you, instead of telling me “We’ve all got time enough to cry”? ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2010, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/54 "2010-01-20T16:47:39Z")
[Jump around](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwQbPgouUYo) by House of Pain has always struck me as a kind of douchey/frat boy kind of song. There’s also [this example](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=koVHN6eO4Xg) of extreme douche-dom too. ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2010, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/55 "2010-01-20T17:35:59Z")
I’m at work so I can’t see if my nomination has already been posted as a YouTube link, but - \*\*Every Morning \*\*by Sugar Ray. For these lines: _Every morning there’s a halo hanging from the corner of my girlfriend’s four post bed, I know it’s not mine but I’ll see if I can use it for the weekend or a one night stand_ So, he’s going to steal his girlfriend’s “halo”(whatever that is) for a one night stand? Douchebag. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2010, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/56 "2010-01-20T19:12:34Z")
> [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > [Jump around](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DwQbPgouUYo) by House of Pain has always struck me as a kind of douchey/frat boy kind of song. “I’ll serve your ass like John McEnroe…if your girl steps up I’m smackin’ the ho” is douchey? ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2010, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/57 "2010-01-20T21:07:55Z")
You’re telling me it’s not? ---
**Author:** ![Eman\_Resu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bc8723/32.png) [@Eman\_Resu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eman_Resu)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2010, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/58 "2010-01-20T22:42:36Z")
I would wager that the majority of douchebags who have made an effort to appear more sophistercated have at some point downloaded and subsequently fallen asleep to Pachelbel’s Canon and either Miles Davis’ _Kind of Blue_ or Dave Brubeck’s _Time Out_. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2010, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/59 "2010-01-21T01:26:50Z")
> [@Illuminatiprimus](#): > > You’re telling me it’s not? I’m being sarcastic. Of course it is. ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2010, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241/60 "2010-01-21T10:59:40Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > I’m being sarcastic. Of course it is. Phew! 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/douchebag-songs/525241.md?page=4)