# Dougie\_monty is an immoral cultist **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 20, 2014, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993 "2014-08-20T13:31:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/141 "2014-08-22T00:33:23Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > When a man, his hand and his dick love each other very, very much… Funny as a crutch. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/142 "2014-08-22T00:39:21Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > Funny as a crutch. That’s as funny as a battleship with a screen door. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/143 "2014-08-22T00:43:49Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > OK dougie, focus with me here… > > You said “I have read matter from _The Invisible Man_ by Ralph Ellison” > > not “I have read _The Invisible Man_ by Ralph Ellison” > > The way you phrased it led me to think you read sections of _The Invisible Man_, not the whole book. Then you said you did a book report on it. I remember when I did book reports, I usually didn’t read the whole book. I read just enough to sound like I knew what I was talking about when I wrote it up. I got As too. > > Now, how long ago was this book report? Were you in high school? That would be over 45 years ago. Not exactly up to current events with that, chief. > > Kudos for reading Asimov. The man truly was one of the 20th century’s great visionaries. But again, the bulk of his work was decades ago. Still not up to current events. > > Have you read anything contemporary, say within the past 20 years? You didn’t know about facials and selfies. You see the point we’re trying to make here? You are seriously out of touch, chief. I think you tried to read the post wrong. Maybe I should have phrased it, for example, “I have read matter \* ranging \* from Ralph Ellison to Asimov to Brunvand.” I did indeed read Ellison ’ s entire book–in a college course, as I already said. As a junior in high school, in spring 1966, I read \* Grapes of Wrath \* by John Steinbeck–in one evening. The more current authors whose books I have are Brunvand and David Feldman. I have countless tomes bought in places such as Barnes & Noble. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/144 "2014-08-22T00:45:57Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > That’s as funny as a battleship with a screen door. Why don’t you make like a tree, and get out of here? ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/145 "2014-08-22T00:46:27Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > [Moderating] > Actually, that’s pretty good advice from **Smeghead**. We get really twitchy about any mention of lawyers and the SDMB, and threatening one with the other is pretty much an instant ban. I’m not doing it in this case, because you didn’t appear to be threatening the SDMB directly, and also because the odds of you finding a lawyer for this issue who wouldn’t laugh you out of his office are vanishingly small. But given your general inabilities to both react proportionately to other people’s posts, and to state your own intentions and viewpoints clearly, it would probably be a good rule of thumb for you to avoid using the words “lawyer” or, in particular, “lawsuit” on the boards. > [/Moderating] Point well taken. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/146 "2014-08-22T00:47:18Z")
I don’t know if CliffsNotes count as _tomes_, nor do I know if reading the Grapes of Wrath CliffsNotes counts as having read the book itself. ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/147 "2014-08-22T00:48:52Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > For WHAT??? Are you fucking retarded? Oh, sure. Only someone who is retarded would so much as think of being indignant over a blatant contradiction. Right.:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/148 "2014-08-22T00:50:13Z")
> [@Kamino\_Neko](#): > > Ia ia Jehovah fthagn! Say that five times real fast. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/149 "2014-08-22T00:51:20Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > That’s as funny as a battleship with a screen door. I think “submarine” is a better word here. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![dougie\_monty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@dougie\_monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dougie_monty)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/150 "2014-08-22T00:53:17Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > I don’t know if CliffsNotes count as _tomes_, nor do I know if reading the Grapes of Wrath CliffsNotes counts as having read the book itself. I’ve practically never even seen Cliff Notes. ---
**Author:** ![jimbuff314](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c57346/32.png) [@jimbuff314](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jimbuff314)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/151 "2014-08-22T01:21:16Z")
So. **Dougie\_Monty** lambasted, introduced to some brand-new 20th century words, phrases and concepts (even one or two 21st century ones) - still a JW (right?). **BPC** vented, “j’accused”, spewed, wound down. Are we done here? 'Cause just want to say there’s this little, elderly JW lady who is so sweet and comes around to my house occasionally. I always enjoy her visits and just nod along in agreement and have a good time together. Such a shame that so joyous (truly!) an appearance can mask such evil as has been pointed out in this thread. ETA : Whoops! Just noticed I capitalized **dougie\_monty** ’s name when he himself does not. Apologies. ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/152 "2014-08-22T01:53:25Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > Considering that one of you has brazenly contradicted me on a matter about which he/she knows absolutely nothing (a book I have read), I believe I have some latitude here. But just a little. I shall be prompt. I love the logic in this post. How can I work this into my daily life? “Hey boss, I know I said I’d have those TPS reports faxed to HQ by noon, but Johnson in Marketing called me a sillynanny at 11:50am. So I believe I have some latitude here.” ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 2:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/153 "2014-08-22T02:54:56Z")
I can bash religion all day, but you have to ask yourself what you’re trying to achieve. **dougie\_monty** obviously thinks he’s perfectly moral, and putting him on the defensive isn’t going to make him rethink the morality of shunning, is it? Personally, I’d suggest re-examining some of that stuff Jesus said. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 3:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/154 "2014-08-22T03:10:07Z")
> [@Budget\_Player\_Cadet](#): > > _sigh_ +1 That shit is so old and boring and annoying. > [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > Should we tell him what a selfie-facial is? Something tells me he already knows about those. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/155 "2014-08-22T03:18:42Z")
> [@dougie\_monty](#): > > I think “submarine” is a better word here. 🙂 Oh, that’s right. We forgot you walked out of “Back to the Future.” Silly of us to think you’d get that reference. ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/156 "2014-08-22T03:56:04Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > Oh, that’s right. We forgot you walked out of “Back to the Future.” Silly of us to think you’d get that reference. It was his density… ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/157 "2014-08-22T03:56:13Z")
> [@Debaser](#): > > …says the guy who like to fuck mentally disabled minors. > > You’d be uniquely qualified to counsel girls who are victims of sex crimes given that you’ve admitted on this board to being a sex offender yourself. Man, you’re an obsessive stalker. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/158 "2014-08-22T04:30:35Z")
> [@simster](#): > > It was his density… That’s heavy. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/159 "2014-08-22T12:36:23Z")
> [@Ambivalid](#): > > That shit is so old and boring and annoying. As are many of us, I’m afraid. ---
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2014, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993/160 "2014-08-22T12:56:45Z")
My wife told me she developed a fool proof method to getting rid of an annoyingly persistent guy flirting with her, she would tell them she was a Jehovah’s Witness. Said it worked like a charm lol. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dougie_monty-is-an-immoral-cultist/695993.md?page=9)