# Dr. Laura, Fuck the Fuck Off, m'kay? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 25, 2001, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771 "2001-09-25T19:51:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![TheeGrumpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@TheeGrumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheeGrumpy)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/41 "2001-09-26T17:04:51Z")
According to a Rush Limbaugh [fan page](http://rosecity.net/rush/rushtour.html), the Formerly Rotund One did indeed attend Southeast Missouri State University. Didn’t graduate, though. Since then, he’s earned some honorary degrees (Pepperdine, anyone?). Full disclosure: I didn’t finish college either. But then again, I don’t talk like a goddamn windbag. ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/42 "2001-09-26T19:32:27Z")
Bad news for you, Stoid. As the purpose of marriage is obviously, in Dr L’s eyes, to have children, someone who is unable to so do naturally obviously has no business getting married. One of the more asinine ideas on the planet, that. But it’s been tried before. I seem to recall a number of years ago, a Catholic priest got a little flamed because he refused to perform a marriage ceremony for someone who was unable to consummate the union. ---
**Author:** ![anya\_marie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ebca7d/32.png) [@anya\_marie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anya_marie)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2001, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/43 "2001-09-26T20:30:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cartooniverse \* > \*\*All I can add is, " I am not my son’s father". > \*\* About a year ago, our dear Doc Shitslinger was selling teeshirts of her webpage, that read “I am my child’s mother.” The doc is scarily interested, in, that as many women as possible should be stay-at-home-moms. And she proclains it as the best thing a woman can do, over as many forums and as loudly as she can. I have no problem with couples deciding this for themselves. My problem is that Laura the Festering bedsore of Ignorance has decrreed that if she says it, it must be so and you are a godless, soullless, whore, if you should happen to think outside the box. I used to think she had something worthwhile to say, but she makes a one-trick-pony loook like a 3-ring circus in talent. Praise Cecil that some people can see her for the harpy that she is. Praise Cecil that i saw what she was trying to do. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2001, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/44 "2001-09-27T23:45:42Z")
**Cartooniverse** , thanks for he elucidation. I feel like such a dope. I had completely blanked on the old “I’m my kid’s mom.” self-congratultory sound bite of hers. Good comeback. ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2001, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/45 "2001-09-28T00:08:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SPOOFE \* > \*\* > Of course, because when I was 17 years and 364 days old, I was four-foot tall, had nice, strawberry blonde hair, and a light, young’un voice… complemented with a nice bit of baby fat. The very next day, however, I was two feet taller, my balls dropped, a big ol tuft of facial hair, chest hair, and pubic hair appeared (in the appropriate bodily regions, of course), I suddenly had a very bassy voice, and dammit, I had this huge fucking hardon that didn’t go away for a week. \*\* Somehow I missed this. Allow me to respond. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!! :\* 😉 > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Monty \* \*\* > Bad news for you, Stoid. As the purpose of marriage is obviously, in Dr L’s eyes, to have children, someone who is unable to so do naturally obviously has no business getting married. > \*\* Oh dear. So I guess her advice would be “Get thee to a nunnery!” Bitch. stoid ---
**Author:** ![MFS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/da6949/32.png) [@MFS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MFS)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2001, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/46 "2001-09-28T00:09:11Z")
I’m sure its in the Bible somewhere… ---
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2001, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/47 "2001-09-28T00:13:58Z")
Well, her death would certainly get her out of our faces, but as far as punishment, it would be deeply unsatisfying. Far better to tie her up and make her watch unmarried people happily having sex, single mothers raising healthy, wonderful kids, and all kinds of people having happy, healthy, successful lives without the assistance of any religious activity. Then we’d top it off by making her go cruising with \*\* Esprix.\*\* 😉 stoid ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2001, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/48 "2001-09-28T01:23:01Z")
I caught most of the episodes of her TV show. What was the most offensive/stupid/bigotted/ thing she said? That would be everything. ``` That woman is one of the greatest reservoirs of pure hate on the planet. If we could build a car that ran on hate, Laura could fuel all our nation's automobiles for at least the next 300 years. Cartooniverse, she doesn't make me ``` ahamed that I’M a Jew. She makes me ashamed that SHE’S a Jew. I’m curious when she goes to services, do thunder and lightning erupt regardless of the wheather? Can she actually set foot on holy ground? ``` I say we all need to go to her book signings. Just print out those nude photos and slip them into the book, first. ``` ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2001, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/49 "2001-09-28T11:57:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kaylasdad99 \* > \*\ ***Cartooniverse** , thanks for he elucidation. I feel like such a dope. I had completely blanked on the old “I’m my kid’s mom.” self-congratultory sound bite of hers. > > Good comeback. \*\* You’re **NOT** a Dope, you’re a **Doper**. 😃 Be proud, man. I appreciate the apology, but coming from a guy who apparently competes with 98 OTHER men to claim the honor of being **kayla** ’s father, I wouldn’t worry about being a dope. I’d just worry about passing the paternity exam. 😉 KIDDING !!! kidding. As for Dr. Carbunkle, that quote of hers that she uses ad nauseum escaped your memory? Really? I’m agog with jealousy ! **Doc Cathode**??? Upon reflection, I have to admit that your take on this is more refined, and more in line with how I do feel. I guess I’m ashamed that she is a Jew. Nicely said. Cheers, Cartooniverse p.s. I bet kayla is just the apple of your eye, as is my daughter. I hope you weren’t offended by my smarmy remark up there. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2001, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/50 "2001-09-29T00:24:32Z")
Not a bit. Cheers. ---
**Author:** ![Mudshark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f04885/32.png) [@Mudshark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mudshark)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2001, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/51 "2001-09-29T06:39:02Z")
Dr. Laura should rot in Hell. She is an over-educated shithead with no common sense. ---
**Author:** ![jk1245](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/49beb7/32.png) [@jk1245](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jk1245)\ **Post date:** [September 29, 2001, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771/52 "2001-09-29T07:12:53Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by Stoid \* \*\* “He’s not a child, he’s a MAN. Enough with mothers telling \*\* men \*\* to [obnoxious taunting voice] feel better [/obnoxious taunting voice]. Don’t call me whining that this is an inconvenience and a threat. Enough with reassuring men as though they were small children” \*\* :rolleyes: Yeah, as all parents know, as soon as your child turns 18 you stop caring about them at all. In fact, whether they live or die becomes an insignificant point from the parent’s POV. I can’t believe people actually wait on hold to be berated by that desicated, horse-teethed waste of skin and her mail order PhD. Think I’m gonna get me some welder’s googles and oven mitts and print off some o’ her naked photos then take them to her next book signing and she if she’ll autograph them. “Hi. LOVE your show. Could you sign these please? Right across the crotch if you don’t mind. I’m hoping the marker ink will cover up the 12 day old pickled herring stench that’s shimmering off the page. Thanks” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dr-laura-fuck-the-fuck-off-mkay/83771.md?page=2)