Dr. Snoreslots, or, How I learned to stop worrying and love the noise

The BBQ Pit
21

Originally posted by Libertarian

I see silent screams,
Red faces too,
I see them blush
From the garrote I’ve used
And I think to myself
“What a wonderful word”.

I see bug eyes blue
And wires so tight,
The arms they flay
Grows weak their fight
And I think to myself
“Give it just one more twirl.”

The snores of the Daddys,
So loud in the sky,
I’ll remove from everyone’s ears
If they’’ just bring me pie.
I see scouts shaking heads,
Saying “How loud you snooze”
They’re really saying,
“You sleep like I poos.”

I hear Webelos cry
“Make the noise go”.
They’ll sleep much more
Than if I just plugged Dad’s nose.
And I think to myself,
Garrote’s a wonderful word.
Yes, I think to myself,
Garrote’s a wonderful word.

22

Lieu could you possibly be Sauron’s long lost twin?

He routinely makes up parody songs using vegetables as the central theme.

That was just brilliant. :smiley:

23

Actually, there’s probably a greater chance that I’m one of his vegetables.

24

An ex used to do that sometimes. It sounded worse than fingernails across a blackboard. I swear I could almost hear her teeth cracking.

25

I wear earplugs and still can’t sleep if my SO is snoring. He snores no matter what position he’s sleeping in. My only recourse is to nudge him (how hard depends on how many times I’ve previously nudged him) and then hope to God I manage to fall asleep before he starts up again.

Great OP though. :slight_smile: