# Dress codes at upscale restaurants **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 21, 2010, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807 "2010-04-21T00:38:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/21 "2010-04-21T15:08:25Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > It drives me nuts, personally. Can’t we have _anything_ special anymore? I know people are going to say it’s none of my business what they wear when we’re in the same restaurant, but if my party is all dressed up for a birthday or anniversary and you’re wearing your jorts at the next table it makes it less nice for us. Ruins the atmosphere. Take issue with the restaurant, not the other diners. They’re wearing what the restaurant says is OK. ---
**Author:** ![Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/848f3c/32.png) [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuzzy_Dunlop)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/22 "2010-04-21T15:21:01Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Take issue with the restaurant, not the other diners. They’re wearing what the restaurant says is OK. Why do we have to take issue with the restaurant? Why can’t we take issue with the people who chose to dress casually? ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/23 "2010-04-21T15:21:44Z")
I was asking a concierge about the dress code for Thomas Keller’s Bouchon in Las Vegas, and she seemed delightedly surprised that I would even ask. We lamented a bit over how few people dress well for dinner. Admittedly I rarely wear a dress or skirt, but I’ll wear very nice dress slacks, heels, and a good blouse for a dinner out at an even halfway-decent restaurant. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/24 "2010-04-21T15:22:59Z")
> [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](#): > > Why do we have to take issue with the restaurant? Why can’t we take issue with the people who chose to dress casually? There are restaurants with dress codes. You went to one that tells people it’s hokey dorey to dress casually. You’re the one with the unrealistic expectations. ---
**Author:** ![JuliaSqueezer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/82dd89/32.png) [@JuliaSqueezer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JuliaSqueezer)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/25 "2010-04-21T15:25:16Z")
While I would hope that the slob in the cutoffs, wife-beater and baseball cap would feel some tiny bit of embarrassment to be surrounded by nicely dressed restaurant patrons, I know this isn’t the case, just based on experience. People that unaware or uncaring of how they present themselves to the world would not ever stop and consider whether or not they may be offending anyone. Take it or leave it. They don’t care, and it shows. We all “get” that they don’t care. We may not congratulate them for it, but we do get it. It’s a pretty honest message. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/26 "2010-04-21T15:32:01Z")
> [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](#): > > Why do we have to take issue with the restaurant? Why can’t we take issue with the people who chose to dress casually? Because the restaurant sets the dress code, and they are the ones that feel that it is more profitable to cater to people who dress casually than to people who are offended by other people dressing casually. The people who dress casually obviously don’t care what you think. So taking issue with them is pointless. ---
**Author:** ![Ronald\_C.Semone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/cc9497/32.png) [@Ronald\_C.Semone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ronald_C.Semone)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/27 "2010-04-21T15:32:17Z")
Last year I took my wife to a nice French restaurant in Washington, D.C. on Valentine’s day,a day I thought was special, and when we were leaving the restaurant one of the staff told us that she and other staff members had noted that I was the only person who ate there that night who was wearing a suit and tie. There is no doubt that the dining dress code has changed. Alas! ---
**Author:** ![Bijou\_Drains](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bijou_drains/32/2814_2.png) [@Bijou\_Drains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bijou_Drains)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/28 "2010-04-21T15:42:00Z")
I guess they feel if they really enforced the dress code their sales would go down. Maybe that is not true but they don’t want to risk it. We have a local alumni center that opened with a dress code and it did not last very long due to the lack of customers. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/29 "2010-04-21T15:42:05Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > There are restaurants with dress codes. You went to one that tells people it’s hokey dorey to dress casually. You’re the one with the unrealistic expectations. People shouldn’t have to be told! If I plan a funeral should I have to tell everybody to leave the Daisy Dukes at home? ---
**Author:** ![Bijou\_Drains](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bijou_drains/32/2814_2.png) [@Bijou\_Drains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bijou_Drains)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/30 "2010-04-21T15:46:18Z")
I have noticed recently that some people don’t dress up with a full suit even for a wedding or a funeral. That doesn’t bother me but I still wear suits for those events. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/31 "2010-04-21T15:48:20Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > People shouldn’t have to be told! If I plan a funeral should I have to tell everybody to leave the Daisy Dukes at home? Funeral implies formal. Restaurants can and do enforce dress codes. The ones being mentioned have taken the position that they’re OK with people dressing casually. ---
**Author:** ![Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/848f3c/32.png) [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuzzy_Dunlop)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/32 "2010-04-21T15:49:21Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Because the restaurant sets the dress code, and they are the ones that feel that it is more profitable to cater to people who dress casually than to people who are offended by other people dressing casually. The people who dress casually obviously don’t care what you think. So taking issue with them is pointless. Are you saying that in theory something could be done about the situation by taking issue with the restaurant? Like, by simply patronizing only restaurants that do enforce a dress code or more actively complaining to the management about the lack of formality? That makes sense, but it doesn’t seem like an issue you actually do something about. It’s an issue you complain about to people who feel the same way as you with no intention of improving the attire of anyone. If all you want to do is grumble I’d say the blame goes squarely on people who don’t want to dress as nice as me when eating and not the restaurant that made the prudent business decision. For what it’s worth, I don’t really care. I like to dress up for a nice dinner but I can understand why others don’t. I know people who find it outrageous that people don’t dress up for air travel any more and I think they’re absolutely crazy. Flying is tiring, uncomfortable and you’re often exposed to overly warm and overly cold environments all in one trip. In my opinion people ought to dress as comfortably as possible. For me, that means loafers I can slip off and a shirt that looks nice untucked plus a sweater I can take off easily, but honestly if i were most comfortable in sweats and a tank top I’d wear that because I just hate flying. Yet there are people who are offended by people underdressed for flying. So I can accept that there are people who just don’t understand why they should dress up to eat dinner. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/33 "2010-04-21T15:53:32Z")
> [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](#): > > Are you saying that in theory something could be done about the situation by taking issue with the restaurant? Like, by simply patronizing only restaurants that do enforce a dress code or more actively complaining to the management about the lack of formality? It’s like going to a McDonald’s and complaining about the playland. The restaurants have a dress code. Casual dress falls into that. It really is black and white. > [@The Big Fuzz](#): > > That makes sense, but it doesn’t seem like an issue you actually do something about. It’s an issue you complain about to people who feel the same way as you with no intention of improving the attire of anyone. If all you want to do is grumble I’d say the blame goes squarely on people who don’t want to dress as nice as me when eating and not the restaurant that made the prudent business decision. No, you should be grumbling about the fall in restaurant standards. ---
**Author:** ![Bijou\_Drains](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bijou_drains/32/2814_2.png) [@Bijou\_Drains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bijou_Drains)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/34 "2010-04-21T15:54:15Z")
People still think we should dress up to fly? In 2010? That is nuts. Are these people 80 years old and up? Here in the South we still have people who dress up for a college FB game which I think is totally nutty. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/35 "2010-04-21T15:55:18Z")
When I think of dress-only restaurants, I’m thinking more of the Whitney. I would absolutely expect to be turned away from there in jeans. Steak Houses are almost always more relaxed. In Virginia (at least, Northern VA) you will generally find a section of the restaurant to which more casually dressed diners are relegated. Even [the Amphora](http://www.amphoragroup.com/Restaurant/tabid/792/Default.aspx) in Vienna (essentially a high-level diner) will peel you off toward the deli booths if you’re in jeans. I’d never have the nerve to show up at LAuberge in blue jeans, but I’ve seen it in the past, and the lady in question was seated in the rear corner of the restaurant. It appeared to be quite an occasion for both her and her escort, and they had clearly worn the best they had. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/36 "2010-04-21T15:58:41Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > Funeral implies formal. Restaurants can and do enforce dress codes. The ones being mentioned have taken the position that they’re OK with people dressing casually. Two hundred bucks for dinner also implies formal. ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/37 "2010-04-21T15:59:41Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > Two hundred bucks for dinner also implies formal. The restaurant owners, the ones who set the dress code, obviously disagree. ---
**Author:** ![Bijou\_Drains](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bijou_drains/32/2814_2.png) [@Bijou\_Drains](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bijou_Drains)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/38 "2010-04-21T16:01:32Z")
Maybe in the past the only people willing to pay $200 were people who dressed up. Now more people will pay that and wear jeans. This reminds me of the express line at a grocery store - do they ever tell someone with more than 10 items to move to another line? Not that I can tell. ---
**Author:** ![Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/848f3c/32.png) [@Fuzzy\_Dunlop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fuzzy_Dunlop)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/39 "2010-04-21T16:01:38Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > No, you should be grumbling about the fall in restaurant standards. Why did you change my name like that? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2010, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807/40 "2010-04-21T16:05:45Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > People shouldn’t have to be told! If I plan a funeral should I have to tell everybody to leave the Daisy Dukes at home? I’ve only been to three funerals. To one I wore a suit. The other two were for close friends, and we all knew dress would be casual. One in particular was for a biker guy. Hundreds of people paid their respects, mostly wearing leather. And yes, Daisy Dukes/bikini tops, because that is what the deceased would have liked. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dress-codes-at-upscale-restaurants/536807.md?page=3)