# drewtwo99, the next time you have a question about zombies... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 17, 2012, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461 "2012-07-17T00:36:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/41 "2012-07-17T13:17:32Z")
I just want to make sure we’re all on the same page here. When attacked by Zombies, please follow the three recommended steps. Too many people forget the third step, and it makes the problem appear much less serious than it really is. EVADE DEFEND REPORT ---
**Author:** ![D\_Odds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/d_odds/32/2882_2.png) [@D\_Odds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/D_Odds)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/42 "2012-07-17T13:46:45Z")
All I ever make are bad jokes and I never get pitted. What am I doing wrong? ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/43 "2012-07-17T13:53:38Z")
For starters you aren’t drewtwo99. That first step is crucial. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/44 "2012-07-17T14:11:19Z")
> [@D\_Odds](#): > > All I ever make are bad jokes and I never get pitted. What am I doing wrong? People are probably missing them. Switch to a funny font with colored text. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/45 "2012-07-17T14:12:38Z")
> [@Morgenstern](#): > > I just want to make sure we’re all on the same page here. When attacked by Zombies, please follow the three recommended steps. Too many people forget the third step, and it makes the problem appear much less serious than it really is. > > EVADE > DEFEND > REPORT Unfortunately, most people rarely follow through to the REPORT stage. By the time they ask the football coach what to do and then think about it and then forget to check up on it and pretend you forgot it happened, and of course play with some paper towel tubes… Zombaggeddon! ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/46 "2012-07-17T17:26:59Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > Since I don’t want this Pitting to be all one sided I’ll join in with the OP. **drewtwo99** you are a poopyhead. > > I hate it when I get so worked up about an issue. Hey now! That’s uncalled for. I’m sure all the poopyheads in the world take offense to you including me in their group. I’m \*WAY \*worse than those guys 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/47 "2012-07-17T17:44:13Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > Dude! You got pitted!!! You are one of the cool kids now. I’m so jealous 🙂 Wait; getting pitted makes one _cool_? No shit. In that case, ya’ll need to bow down…🆒 ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/48 "2012-07-17T18:13:36Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > Hey now! That’s uncalled for. I’m sure all the poopyheads in the world take offense to you including me in their group. I’m \*WAY \*worse than those guys 😃 Stop enjoying your pitting you wanker. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/49 "2012-07-17T18:38:06Z")
> [@Electric\_Warrior](#): > > A new member (been just a few weeks IIRC) who changed usernames, **Even seven**. Because it resembled the username of an active poster, **even sven**. And so they were asked to change it, which they did. To something that resembles the username of another active poster, **Scarlett67**. Which was grumbled about [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=658120), to my amusement. > > But then this thread came along and as God is my witness, I actually, really, truly did think it was posted by **Scarlett67**. :smack: I need a blushing smiley. Is this the same poster who used Z3nster a few years ago when Zenster was still a member? ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/50 "2012-07-17T19:05:28Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > ETA: I got my cat declawed when she was a kitten, and has never had a normal cat life because of that. There, now you have something decent to pit me over! > [@elucidator](#): > > Yeah, ok, but kinda weak. Now, if you bought her a scratching post, that would add a bit of flair. I got my latest cat from the shelter. He was already declawed. I already had a scratching post and he uses it all the time. It’s so cute. ---
**Author:** ![Bilbo1967](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@Bilbo1967](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bilbo1967)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/51 "2012-07-17T19:27:36Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > A newb is getting butthurt about a zombie joke? That wasn’t even directed at them? > > Suck it up and quit being such a cry-baby. > [@drewtwo99](#): > > Man, you have a lot of people who you need to pit then, considering I only do it because I want to fit in with the \*\*\*cool \*\*\*posters who also post zombie jokes. > > Also, the jokes I do are of the most derivative, ironic fashion I can possibly imagine. So I have no problem with you pitting them for being lame. > > And yes, ScarletNumber is Even Seven, who is a new poster not an old one. > > ETA: I got my cat declawed when she was a kitten, and has never had a normal cat life because of that. There, now you have something decent to pit me over! > [@Morgenstern](#): > > So many noobs here are in no danger of being eaten by zombies. > [@Max\_the\_Immortal](#): > > Do yourself a favor and refrain from starting Pit threads for a while, newbie. You’re really bad at it. I agree that this was a pretty weak pitting about a pretty inoffensive zombie joke, but why the “newbie” shit? It’s a poor look out if calling people “newb” is an accepted form of insult - there are plenty of long-time posters here who speak nothing but crap, and yet they seem to be tolerated - because they’re ‘our’ crap talkers? ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/52 "2012-07-17T19:54:14Z")
please note that I used the inoffensive term “new poster” and not newb, or newfag. I wouldn’t want to upset the delicate sensibilities here in The Pit. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/53 "2012-07-17T20:06:34Z")
I counted maybe 16 instances since **drewtwo99** came on board in the past year or so in which he made a pithy zombie wisecrack after an old thread had been bumped. It just reminds me of the people on some forums (not here, though), who, when something new is posted, someone just posts “First!” At one time, zombie threads were greatly frowned upon for reasons outlined in Dex’s notes, but, since the board is easily searchable with Google, in a number of cases, people have signed up who had relevant info to a dormant thread. Personally I’d prefer leaving the wisecracks to those clueless _laowai_ who sign up and post something irrelevant in an old thread. ETA: Full disclosure: I wouldn’t have even known that someone else had noticed this had he not responded to an old thread I bumped recently. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/54 "2012-07-17T20:15:21Z")
It’s not necessarily an insult to call someone a Newbie, newb, or noob. It is slang for someone who is a newcomer. It’s not an insult in that respect. Calling a longtime poster a noob is an insult, albeit a weak one, as it implies he’s a beginner or he has acted like one. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/55 "2012-07-17T20:30:35Z")
Only 16??? I better get to work spotting these zombie threads!! That’s like… only a couple per month ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Belowjob2.0](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Belowjob2.0](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Belowjob2.0)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2012, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/56 "2012-07-18T03:34:38Z")
> [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Is that in the Caribbean? It’s wherever ScarletNumber happens to be. Not so much a place as a state of mind. Not so much a state of mind as a lack of mind. Not so much a singing bird as a steaming turd. To borrow a quote, “Fast, cheap and out of control” ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2012, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/57 "2012-07-18T03:53:07Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > … Are you an anti-zombite?.. Nitpick: that’s anti-zombian. ---
**Author:** ![Satchmo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/satchmo/32/4223_2.png) [@Satchmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satchmo)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2012, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/58 "2012-07-18T12:59:23Z")
Quote: Originally Posted by Belowjob2.0 …Whore Island… > [@MeanOldLady](#): > > Is that in the Caribbean? Well, it used to be one of the Virgin Islands. ETA With a better joke, too. ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2012, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/59 "2012-07-19T02:01:35Z")
> [@zweisamkeit](#): > > It’s a weakass pitting, but the zombie jokes are really old and played out. So both suck! Both true. > [@Bilbo1967](#): > > I agree that this was a pretty weak pitting about a pretty inoffensive zombie joke, but why the “newbie” shit? It’s a poor look out if calling people “newb” is an accepted form of insult - there are plenty of long-time posters here who speak nothing but crap, and yet they seem to be tolerated - because they’re ‘our’ crap talkers? > [@Morgenstern](#): > > It’s not necessarily an insult to call someone a Newbie, newb, or noob. It pretty much is intended as an insult. Just as lame as the OP and zombie jokes. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2012, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461/60 "2012-07-19T02:28:31Z")
Can we let this thread drop for a year or two and then revisit it? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drewtwo99-the-next-time-you-have-a-question-about-zombies/628461.md?page=4)