# Drinks you've invented

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [March 7, 2004, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990 "2004-03-07T18:06:19Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/21 "2004-03-09T00:12:26Z")

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Mr Pibb (or Dr. Pepper) and citrus vodka. Tastes just like Smarties candy (the little chalky rolled things that look like tiny Necco wafers).

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**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/22 "2004-03-09T00:16:55Z")

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1/3 Baily’s Irish Creme and 2/3 vanilla ice cream.  
Into a blender. Sip through straw.

Very nice mocca shake for summer parties.

My aunt likes Miller’s Lite poured into a glass full of ice cubes. I don’t know if that is considered a mixed drink, but it is a mixture I am in no mood to taste.

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**Author:** ![panamajack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/47e85d/32.png) [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/23 "2004-03-09T00:31:18Z")

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> [@Krebnar the Magnificent](#):
>
> We actually drank these for a while afterwards, but I heartily caution against it.
> 
> **The Helgremite Shooter**
> 
> 1.5 oz Wild Turkey  
> 1.5 oz Southern Comfort  
> Float 2 oz Baileys.
> 
> It’s called a [Helgremite](http://206.110.20.140/users/thiele/web/creek/field/arthro/helgrem2.html) because it looks like the waters in which they live.

If you’ve never seen the New (1980’s version) [Twilight Zone](http://www.tvtome.com/tvtome/servlet/GuidePageServlet/showid-1702/epid-34398/), that’s a pretty amusing coincidence. I mean, I think that mix would stop anyone from drinking.

The only drinks I recall mixing are also ones I wouldn’t suggest :

Dr. Pepper & Tequila

“The Old Man & The Sea” : A shot of rum with a splash of fish sauce.

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**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/24 "2004-03-09T00:59:07Z")

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Eh, well, just a little outside the scope of this thread, but I first got seriously drunk as a sophmore in High School. Me and one of my two step-brothers ( we are the same age ) got into the family booze one night and decided to experiment a bit. I drank quite a bit more than my sibling, who eventuqally just started “feeding” me. The capper was a sizeable concoction consisting of ( I think this is close, but I might be misremembering slightly ):

Nasty-ass white wine from a box  
Gimlet’s Lime Mixer  
Brandy  
Michelob ( I think ) beer  
Gin  
Vodka  
Welch’s grape soda ( I think )

Don’t recall the proportions. He referred to it simply as “The Mixture”. I didn’t refer to it as anything at all, as I was wayyyy far gone at that point. I drank it. I then vomited profusely. For quite some time. Luckily, I imagine, as our inhibitions long since lowered, we had ceased being secretive about measuring our consumption and I had on my own emptied almost an entire fifth of gin - at the age I probably would have died of alcohol poisoning.

I don’t recall _exactly_ what it tasted like. It was slightly fizzy. Feel free to try it and let me know what you think :D.

To this day though, I can’t drink gin.

- Tamerlane

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**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/25 "2004-03-09T01:23:43Z")

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I’ve come up with a variant: moisten the rim of the glass, press into a saucer of powdered sugar, and \*et voila \* – the _Miami_ version… geddit? Particularly good way to treat a Tom Collins.

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**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/26 "2004-03-09T02:15:29Z")

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Grown Up Rasberry Lemonade:

One bottle Mike’s Hard Lemonade  
Jigger of Chambord

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**Author:** ![Dragon\_Phoenix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@Dragon\_Phoenix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragon_Phoenix)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/27 "2004-03-09T07:18:14Z")

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_The French connection_: pernod with apple juice.

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**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/28 "2004-03-09T08:20:41Z")

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_The Amygdaloidal Basalt_  
Amarula Cream, peppermint liqueur and kahlua, shaken.  
The peppermint makes such lovely translucent blobs in the dark brown matrix - any geologist/rockhound would understand the appeal.  
Invented in the desert in Namibia by yours truly.  
Also, the _U-Boat_ - black sambuca in a tot glass at the bottom of a pint of cider - I think it’s the only drink here to be invented and drunk 2 km underground!

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**Author:** ![Clear\_Air\_Turbulence](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/50afbb/32.png) [@Clear\_Air\_Turbulence](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clear_Air_Turbulence)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 8:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/29 "2004-03-09T08:27:35Z")

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I came up with a good one at a party. I named it Neon Death.

1 part Tarantula Azul tequila  
1 part Sweet and Sour mix

Was a very pretty green color, and a lot stronger than it tasted.

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**Author:** ![3Much](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/3/4af34b/32.png) [@3Much](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3Much)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/30 "2004-03-09T11:41:28Z")

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Okay, I think I had better begin by letting you all know that I do not drink. Never have, probably never will. Nothing religious about it, just never got started.

But, being a stand-up comic, I _do_ spend copious amounts of time in bars. While at a local watering hole here in Las Vegas, I observed many patrons enjoying Jello-shots out of tiny plastic cups. Being the sick individual I am, I immediately had a disgusting inspiration. Instead of using instant Jello and vodka, they could use instant Jello CHOCOLATE PUDDING and a peanut flavored liqueur called Peanut Lolita that I saw behind the bar.

Since the only way to “drink” this concoction would be to stick your tongue in and lick it all out, I named them **RIM JOBS**.

The bar owner, who was always in attendance on comedy night, ran out to buy the pudding mix right then and there. They turned out to be quite popular, but I still haven’t tried one.

The only real bad part to this all? Four months later, the place changed from a nice little hole-in-the-wall dive into a transgender/transvestite bar. My guess is that they still serve the drinks in there, but I ain’t going in to find out.

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**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/31 "2004-03-09T14:57:53Z")

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Some friends at college made (and drank) a Spam Daquiri. To this day, no one knows why. It didn’t catch on.

They also created a Peanutbutter Colata, with similar results.

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**Author:** ![brainfizz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/da6949/32.png) [@brainfizz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brainfizz)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/32 "2004-03-09T16:57:04Z")

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Tastiest cocktail I’ve ever invented was:

Tropical cow juice:  
2 shots Malibu in a tall glass of milk.

Tastes absolutely gorgeous.  
Most evil cocktail was:

Liquid Fire:  
2 shots vodka.  
1 shot tequila.  
Several (7-8) splashes Tabasco Sauce.  
Cayenne Pepper on the rim of the glass.  
3 shots boiling water.  
Squirt of lemon juice.  
2 ice cubes (watch them explode!)

VERY hard to drink! Tastes lovely if you can cope with the burning.

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**Author:** ![Gumbercules](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a183cd/32.png) [@Gumbercules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gumbercules)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/33 "2004-03-09T17:53:44Z")

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Mix even amounts of orange juice and cheap white wine. Serve over lots of ice. It’s actually pretty good!

My nephew named it the UE-32. kind of like the B-52, except I’m Uncle Eric and I was 32 when I invented it.

The UE-34 is the same thing except with tomato juice. It’s not very good…

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**Author:** ![chorizo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@chorizo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chorizo)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/34 "2004-03-09T18:00:31Z")

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The Dirty Rollie Fingers:

1 shot vodka  
1 shot of pickled egg brine (although I suppose any pickling brine would suffice).  
1 dash Tabasco  
1 slice jalapeno

Some people like 'em, some don’t.  
A friend and I wanted to come up with the worst drink ever, and invented this:

The Really Bad Yeast Infection:

1 shot Midori (melon flavored liquer)  
1 shot Root Beer Schnapps  
1 dash whipped cream

Mix the whipped cream into the booze with your finger so it’s kind of clumpy before drinking.

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**Author:** ![Matchka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/77aa72/32.png) [@Matchka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Matchka)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/35 "2004-03-09T20:06:21Z")

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College drinks…of course.  
**Dundee:** Gatorade & 151 Rum  
**Dundov:** Gatorade & 100 Vodka  
**Pedephile** Cranberry Juice and 151 (we didn’t know it was caled something else at the time)  
**Unnameable** Jolt & 151  
Several others involving unscientific blends of all or some of the following: Beer, Carlo Rossi (pink), Vodka, Rum, OJ, Gatorade, Coca Cola, Jolt

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**Author:** ![YellowTail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/b5ac83/32.png) [@YellowTail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YellowTail)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/36 "2004-03-09T22:09:31Z")

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> [@Sharopolis](#):
>
> I don’t know if Irn Bru is widely available outside of the UK, but it’s basicly iron flavoured pop, made in Scotland from girders.

WTF?!?!

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**Author:** ![Aceospades](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Aceospades](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aceospades)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/37 "2004-03-09T22:59:16Z")

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\*\*The CranAppletini: \*\* 1 ½ oz High-grade vodka, 1 ½ oz sour apple schnapps, and a small ice cube made from frozen cranberry juice. This is a great drink because as the cranberry cube melts it changes the ratio of the ingredients of the drink so that every sip tastes different (also the cranberry cube keeps the drink colder longer). If you drink it fast enough you get a cranberry slushy at the bottom of your martini glass. Yum. You can also make a Cosmopolitan this way and use the cube instead of the splash of juice. This gives a very popular drink a look that sets it apart from the normal Cosmos.

\*\*The Green Pineapple: \*\* 1 ½ oz high grade Vanilla vodka, 1 ½ oz pineapple juice, one or two drops of blue curacao. This has a very tropical taste to it and is not very strong because half of it is juice. The yellow pineapple juice and the blue curacao mix together to make the drink look green. I’ve been thinking about substituting Hpnotiq for the blue curacao for more of a sweeter taste. They actually put this drink on the Sunday brunch menu here at the Hotel Dupont.

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**Author:** ![Hunter\_Hawk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/50afbb/32.png) [@Hunter\_Hawk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hunter_Hawk)\
**Post date:** [March 9, 2004, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/38 "2004-03-09T23:45:02Z")

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> [@lissener](#):
>
> Commie Margarita:  
> Vodka, lime, triple sec

This is better known as the “kamikaze”. Try it using Hangar One mandarin vodka, Cointreau, and fresh lime juice.

In my college days, I came up with the “Oxymoron”: Equal parts Everclear and Jolt cola. Lord, it was awful.

I also found that if you mix Chambord with blackberry Clearly Canadian soda in the right proportions, it comes out very yummy–kind of like a sweet, fruity, slightly alcoholic Italian soda. Unfortunately, I could only make it well in one particular bar because judging the proportions depended on the ambient lighting.

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**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\
**Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/39 "2004-03-10T00:21:54Z")

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While in college, a couple of buddies and I tried on several occasions to make an earth-bound Pan Galactic Gargleblaster. All versions uniformly sucked… ☹

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**Author:** ![Tentacle\_Monster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ba9def/32.png) [@Tentacle\_Monster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tentacle_Monster)\
**Post date:** [March 10, 2004, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/drinks-youve-invented/232990/40 "2004-03-10T03:22:00Z")

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It’s too simple to be worth naming, but Barenjager (German honey liqueur) is wonderful with orange juice. A bottle was among the boatload mentioned in the OP. The boatload also included a big $50 bottle of Bombay Sapphire, Tanqueray, Captain Morgan’s Private Stock, and Margaritaville tequila. The Barenjager was the only bottle I came back and took home. I’m probably getting another coupla bottles this weekend, one for me and one for him.

Barenjager and OJ is lovely, as I said, but I need to make a drink worthy of it. Hmm… with Chai, maybe?

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