# Dumb-Ass on another thread. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 24, 2015, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241 "2015-12-24T05:35:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Psychopants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/eb8c5e/32.png) [@Psychopants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Psychopants)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2015, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/101 "2015-12-28T06:26:40Z")
thank you, Siam Sam for making me feel not crazy. This guy is just makingshitup. ---
**Author:** ![HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58956e/32.png) [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HawaiianBeachBoy_1959)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/102 "2016-01-19T01:15:03Z")
Hello, everybody. This is the REAL HawaiianBeachBoy 1959, and I found out that my idiot brother-in-law got his filthy paws on my laptop, and used it to start this thread. (Great. Just what I fucking needed.) How do I know this? Well, the biggest giveaway is his writing style. His writing style on here was nonsensical, haphazard, all over the place and rife with errors. Perfect match for him. I know for a fact Joyce had money problems, was possibly outright crazy, and was a notorious drinker and spent like a rapper. I also know that Picasso had his issues as well. His Wikipedia article implied that he avoided military service in World War I due to his not being a French citizen and therefore not getting caught in the draft as opposed to buying his way out of the military. (Although, I will admit, I did make quite an ass of myself in the Cafe Society thread that provoked my brother-in-law to this thread…) [Quick question: How would any of you guys define what is a “struggling” artist as opposed to “starving?” (i.e. Van Gogh the “Starving Artist” as opposed to \_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_ the “Struggling Artist?”)] My brother in law thought he was defending me by doing this. Needless to say, I just discovered this thread a week ago. Prior to that, I ignored it, assuming it to be one of his pranks. When I read through this, I knew it had to be him. Just wish I had taken a photo of the utterly priceless expression that was his face when my wife and I busted him. The kicker to this bulletin: my idiot of a brother-in-law has already been punished for this transgression. He’s now stuck doing ALL the housework until December 27, 2016. ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Parker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/35a633/32.png) [@Richard\_Parker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Parker)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/103 "2016-01-19T01:23:48Z")
Well, the font is different, so I’m sold. ---
**Author:** ![steatopygia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/steatopygia/32/3132_2.png) [@steatopygia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/steatopygia)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/104 "2016-01-19T01:33:52Z")
WTF? ---
**Author:** ![HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58956e/32.png) [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HawaiianBeachBoy_1959)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/105 "2016-01-19T01:56:22Z")
> [@steatopygia](#): > > WTF? Yeah. My reaction exactly when I discovered this thread. Long story short, my brother-in-law started this thread without my knowledge, under my username (how he did THAT, I don’t know) and I only caught him last week. He’s not completely stupid, just kind of. He thought (VERY incorrectly) that he was defending me because of that other guy on that Cafe Society thread and then he got on this bend about “honor” and “that idiot needed his ass roasted here.” I was in disbelief that he did something THIS dumb. I apologize to anyone who thought that he was me. I’m the REAL HawaiianBeachBoy. I would not do something THIS ridiculously stupid over what was, at worst, a trivial slight (and even then, just barely qualifies only because of that “culturally biased” comment) based on an incorrect assumption, which, under normal circumstances, I would have just ignored or politely explained to that fellow that the statement in question was an unfair generalization. Now I have to do damage control for the results of his stupidity. (Well, at least it’s pretty funny seeing him wear my missus’ aprons while he does the housework as punishment. :D) ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/106 "2016-01-19T02:01:12Z")
Has your car been mysteriously parked on the other side of town? ---
**Author:** ![HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58956e/32.png) [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HawaiianBeachBoy_1959)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/107 "2016-01-19T02:04:02Z")
> [@madsircool](#): > > Has your car been mysteriously parked on the other side of town? No. I don’t even own a car. Hawaii’s gas prices are high for obvious reasons. ---
**Author:** ![oft\_wears\_hats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/7993a0/32.png) [@oft\_wears\_hats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/oft_wears_hats)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/108 "2016-01-19T02:14:31Z")
> [@madsircool](#): > > Has your car been mysteriously parked on the other side of town? I post like you wanna post, I pit like you wanna pit. I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I’m a sock in all the ways you are not. ---
**Author:** ![HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58956e/32.png) [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HawaiianBeachBoy_1959)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/109 "2016-01-19T02:21:28Z")
> [@oft\_wears\_hats](#): > > I post like you wanna post, I pit like you wanna pit. I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I’m a sock in all the ways you are not. A sock? I don’t understand. Since I’m obviously NOT backing up or even so much as bothering to reward my brother-in-law’s ignominious behavior and since this is my ONLY account, the definition of “sock” on Urban Dictionary being “a false personality used by someone banned from an online forum to circumvent the ban,” I fail to understand how I could be a “sock” in this context. Again, why on Earth would an online “sock” CONDEMN the aforementioned behavior if, ostensibly, the purpose of a “sock” is supposed to DEFEND the original troll? I’m obviously not doing that. I am wholeheartedly ashamed and quite angry that my brother in law did this and I absolutely REFUSE to endorse his behavior. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/110 "2016-01-19T02:51:20Z")
Ban this faptard before others start using a different font. ---
**Author:** ![BlankSlate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blankslate/32/80_2.png) [@BlankSlate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlankSlate)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/111 "2016-01-19T02:52:01Z")
> [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](#): > > What angered me was the last line of his first post. He called me “a culturally-biased Westerner” and “Westerners are constrained by our biases.” While that may apply to some people, I take SERIOUS EXCEPTION to what basically amounted to a personal insult. I am proud to reside in Honolulu, a city that is the definition of cultural diversity. I am a regular at the Polynesian Cultural Center in Laie, on the same island. (It’s a sort of living museum-theme park combination. Good times.) I MOST CERTAINLY DO NOT bias myself against other cultures, and I don’t handle personal insults like that well. The way I reacted, though, was wholly unacceptable, and I have to be a man and own up to acting like an ass on my FIRST THREAD, no less. > [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](#): > > Again, why on Earth would an online “sock” CONDEMN the aforementioned behavior if, ostensibly, the purpose of a “sock” is supposed to DEFEND the original troll? I’m obviously not doing that. I am wholeheartedly ashamed and quite angry that my brother in law did this and I absolutely REFUSE to endorse his behavior. Some things GIVE us away and can’t be hidden by CHANGING the typeface. ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/112 "2016-01-19T02:53:04Z")
Ah, the old “It wasn’t me! I swear! It was someone else acting like a dumbass on my account!” excuse. ---
**Author:** ![Morgenstern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Morgenstern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgenstern)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/113 "2016-01-19T02:56:33Z")
> [@Idle\_Thoughts](#): > > Ah, the old “It wasn’t me! I swear! It was someone else acting like a dumbass on my account!” excuse. But Hal really doesn’t like sheep. ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/114 "2016-01-19T02:58:27Z")
I give **Hal** the benefit of the doubt having been a fairly reasonable and good member years before that topic. I’m less inclined to give posters who just registered and who has one of their very first topics be something trollish or dumbass-like a pass on it. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/115 "2016-01-19T16:14:20Z")
HawaiianBeachBoy could have left his laptop lying around with the SDMB still open, and BiL could have posted in his place. Maybe early 20th-century artists really is a bone of contention between them. Thing is, I’ve never known of any married man who leaves his computer on for his wife to snoop through and check his browsing history. Especially when BiL is known for “pranks.” ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/116 "2016-01-19T16:22:11Z")
> [@Morgenstern](#): > > Ban this faptard before others start using a different font. This post has been fonted by the Faptard! ---
**Author:** ![HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58956e/32.png) [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HawaiianBeachBoy_1959)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/117 "2016-01-19T17:01:29Z")
> [@Knowed\_Out](#): > > HawaiianBeachBoy could have left his laptop lying around with the SDMB still open, and BiL could have posted in his place. Maybe early 20th-century artists really is a bone of contention between them. Thing is, I’ve never known of any married man who leaves his computer on for his wife to snoop through and check his browsing history. Especially when BiL is known for “pranks.” My wife got me this laptop as a wedding present. So, it’s both hers and mine, really. We share it the same way we share the TV together, and therefore, there’s nothing in my browsing history my wife doesn’t know about. My BiL’s pranks are completely harmless and mundane stuff. As dumb as he may be, even he knows there are boundaries. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/118 "2016-01-19T17:21:31Z")
Does anyone here actually care about what happened? ---
**Author:** ![HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58956e/32.png) [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HawaiianBeachBoy_1959)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/119 "2016-01-19T17:44:14Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > Does anyone here actually care about what happened? No. Just wanted to clarify that I had absolutely nothing at all to do with this thread and I didn’t want my brother in law making me look like an ass. I can do a fine job of that myself. 😃 😃 ---
**Author:** ![HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/58956e/32.png) [@HawaiianBeachBoy\_1959](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HawaiianBeachBoy_1959)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2016, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241/120 "2016-01-19T18:37:14Z")
All right, as the real HawaiianBeachBoy, I mean this. You will not see any more posts on this thread under my user name. I refuse to enable my brother in law any further by continuing what he started. I fully intend to finish it with this post. On that note, I would like to thank everyone who replied to this after he started this thread back in December. You taught my brother in law a valuable lesson about not being an ass on the Internet and one he won’t be forgetting as he’s wearing my wife’s collection of frilly, pink, feminine aprons while he does the housework. :D:D:D Aloha. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-ass-on-another-thread/741241.md?page=7)