# Dumb, obvious jokes some people can't help but reflexively make **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 21, 2023, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928 "2023-12-21T12:09:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/61 "2023-12-22T03:03:58Z")
“Rectum? Damn near killed ‘em!” Also, when somebody asks if so-and-so are coming? “Coming? They aren’t even breathing heavy yet.” ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/62 "2023-12-22T03:13:24Z")
Can we retire “lighten up Francis?” Stripes came out 42 years ago. ---
**Author:** ![Richard\_Pearse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/richard_pearse/32/13144_2.png) [@Richard\_Pearse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Richard_Pearse)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/63 "2023-12-22T03:23:01Z")
I know a guy called Pete Mitchell, he’s a pilot. Now I know people refer to him as “Maverick” behind his back, but I don’t know him well enough to know if he gets called “Maverick” to his face. So far I’ve been able to not mention it. My girlfriend is about to spend a day working with someone called Charles Wood. Surely he goes by “Chuck”? But if he doesn’t I wouldn’t want to even think about calling him that. I recently worked with someone whose last name is “Rogers”. An ex Air Force pilot, he goes by “Buck”. Sometimes you just have to own it. ---
**Author:** ![K364](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k364/32/5_2.png) [@K364](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/K364)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/64 "2023-12-22T04:26:20Z")
“Don’t tell me what kind of day to have!” ---
**Author:** ![gnoitall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bb73d2/32.png) [@gnoitall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gnoitall)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/65 "2023-12-22T05:02:09Z")
> [@madmonk28](#): > > Can we retire “lighten up Francis?” Lighten up, Francis. ---
**Author:** ![pirviii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pirviii/32/3233_2.png) [@pirviii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pirviii)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/66 "2023-12-22T05:38:29Z")
> [@Richard\_Pearse](#): > > I recently worked with someone whose last name is “Rogers”. An ex Air Force pilot, he goes by “Buck”. Sometimes you just have to own it. In the military, nicknames are a big thing. I worked with a Capt Nutz, pronounced like nootz. The list of nicknames he generated was huge. ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/67 "2023-12-22T05:56:08Z")
We had a new head of security at work. His name was Don King. I am ashamed to say that the first thing I said upon meeting him I was: “I was expecting big hair.” He rolled his eyes. ---
**Author:** ![superwombat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superwombat/32/16616_2.png) [@superwombat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/superwombat)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/68 "2023-12-22T06:05:55Z")
Living the dream… waking up screaming, cold sweats and all. Nightmares are dreams, too. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/69 "2023-12-22T06:40:57Z")
> [@Moriarty](#): > > > [@xizor](#): > > > > “Working hard? Or hardly working?” > > “Just living the dream” Teamwork makes the … Me: _don’t say it, don’t say it, please for the love of everything holy don’t fucking say it …_ ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 6:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/70 "2023-12-22T06:42:40Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Teamwork makes the … Team work. ---
**Author:** ![WildaBeast](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wildabeast/32/6_2.png) [@WildaBeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WildaBeast)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 6:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/71 "2023-12-22T06:47:12Z")
I just happened to notice there are currently 69 replies in this thread. Nice. Wait, now there are 70. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/72 "2023-12-22T07:26:33Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Teamwork My version of the corollary statement: “There is no I in team … but there is ‘meat.’” ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/73 "2023-12-22T07:26:46Z")
> [@Ike\_Witt](#): > > How do you feel about stud finder gags? Or petcock jokes? ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/74 "2023-12-22T11:51:42Z")
Guess not, it’s a shame because it was original once four decades ago. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/75 "2023-12-22T13:17:11Z")
Most springs at some point I’ll look at a calendar and mention that easter falls on a Sunday this year. I’ll bet 90% of the time the person I’m talking to calmly explains that it is always on a Sunday. ---
**Author:** ![snowthx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowthx/32/10660_2.png) [@snowthx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snowthx)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/76 "2023-12-22T13:19:51Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > Surely you can’t be serious. When a reporter says “Those are the facts…” I have to add “…Jack”. Different movies, but same era. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/77 "2023-12-22T14:16:32Z")
Anyone mentions Badcock Furniture, I’m obligated to say, “Better than no cock at all!” And it’s not even true. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/78 "2023-12-22T14:52:50Z")
Got this from The Simpsons: Jesus is pissed his birthday falls on Christmas. ---
**Author:** ![GESancMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gesancman/32/2923_2.png) [@GESancMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GESancMan)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/79 "2023-12-22T15:12:25Z")
Five or six years ago, on the first day of the quarter, I was taking roll. Most of the students were young, probably born in the late '90s. When I called “Tenille” (first name), though, the woman who said “here” was a bit older. I quipped “hmmm, I’m guessing you were born in the mid-70s?” She replied “1975!” I nodded knowingly, and moved on with the roll-call, while the youngsters all looked confused. I certainly wasn’t making fun of her, I hope she didn’t take it that way. She didn’t seem to. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2023, 3:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928/80 "2023-12-22T15:23:29Z")
> [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Teamwork makes the … > > Me: _don’t say it, don’t say it, please for the love of everything holy don’t fucking say it …_ Related, in that it’s not really a joke but a tired, overused saying often used in a business context: “When you ‘assume’ something, you make an ‘ass’ out of ‘u’ and ‘me’.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumb-obvious-jokes-some-people-cant-help-but-reflexively-make/994928.md?page=5)