# Dumber than a ... **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 3, 2009, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278 "2009-02-03T17:36:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![sherrylynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3be4f8/32.png) [@sherrylynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sherrylynn)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/61 "2009-02-04T18:49:32Z")
My favorite - ‘Not the crispiest chip in the bag’; ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/62 "2009-02-04T19:17:27Z")
Bag of hammers (as opposed to sack of hammers) ---
**Author:** ![BlinkingDuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eada6e/32.png) [@BlinkingDuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlinkingDuck)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/63 "2009-02-04T20:32:18Z")
That boy has 2 and a half brain cells… …and that half cell is dead! {I think from Foghorn Leghorn} ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/64 "2009-02-04T20:40:26Z")
> [@kurilla](#): > > My dad used to say, “Dumber than whale s\*\*t in the bottom of the ocean.” > No idea where he got that one. I think it’s a corruption of “Lower than whale shit” as in “I was feelin’ lower’n whale shit as I watched her walk off arm-in-arm with my best friend.” ---
**Author:** ![Misery\_Loves\_Co](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7cd45c/32.png) [@Misery\_Loves\_Co](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misery_Loves_Co)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/65 "2009-02-04T20:40:31Z")
> [@Uncle\_Brother\_Walker](#): > > \ > I’ve always liked to introduce myself to the rest of the dart teams as the Goalie for my team. \ Thanks to this, I submit: "Dumber than a goalie on a dart team " as a new “dumber’n” ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/66 "2009-02-04T21:50:26Z")
That reminds me… He’s on the olympic javelin catching team. ---
**Author:** ![Black\_Sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ce73a5/32.png) [@Black\_Sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Black_Sunshine)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/67 "2009-02-04T21:51:55Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > Dumber than a box of frogs. Having put about 30 frogs in a box once, I can testify that this is indeed, very dumb. Surprisingly, pretty gay, too. Notthatthere’sanythingwrongwiththat. ---
**Author:** ![EpicNonsense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c37758/32.png) [@EpicNonsense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EpicNonsense)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/68 "2009-02-04T21:57:52Z")
If there was a parallel universe you’d be dumber than than your parallel. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/69 "2009-02-04T22:02:16Z")
I take it it’s not your turn to use the family brain cell today. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [February 4, 2009, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/70 "2009-02-04T23:26:38Z")
Dumb as a bag of hammers with “duh” branded on the handle. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/71 "2009-02-05T02:28:57Z")
> [@Hostile\_Dialect](#): > > “He just kept turning it over like a monkey trying to fuck a football.” I LOVE that! Yet another great quote I will glean and use at the next opportunity. Another one from someone on this board: “dumber’n a bag o’ dicks” One can short of a six-pack And, really, just a dumbass. ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/72 "2009-02-05T03:48:55Z")
Another from Foghorn Leghorn: “That boy’s like Paul Revere’s ride–a little light in the belfry.” ---
**Author:** ![alice\_in\_wonderland](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alice_in_wonderland/32/176_2.png) [@alice\_in\_wonderland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/alice_in_wonderland)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/73 "2009-02-05T04:24:41Z")
“Ass-faced baboon with less sense than god gave a rake” usually gets my point accross. ---
**Author:** ![Glazer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a88e57/32.png) [@Glazer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Glazer)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/74 "2009-02-05T04:49:20Z")
I tell people. It’s not my job to make you look stupid, it’s just my job to point and laugh! ---
**Author:** ![Millit\_the\_Frail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@Millit\_the\_Frail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Millit_the_Frail)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/75 "2009-02-05T06:38:59Z")
“A few fries short of a Happy Meal” is a favorite. My husband once described a girl as “as dumb as a really dumb rock.” That cracked me up to no end. He’s a writer, but he simply had no words for this particular level of dumb. ---
**Author:** ![VarlosZ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d78d45/32.png) [@VarlosZ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VarlosZ)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 6:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/76 "2009-02-05T06:45:47Z")
I generally prefer the “Not the blankest blank in the blank” construction. My favorite is probably “Not the swiftest deer in the forest.” ---
**Author:** ![Sunrazor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sunrazor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunrazor)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/77 "2009-02-05T07:08:30Z")
> [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](#): > > “Dummer 'n sled tracks” has been a favorite of mine since I heard a neighbor use it about one of his kids. I love that! “Sled tracks” aren’t even a THING, they’re — an indentation, a void, and absence of snow with snow all around! I know, I know, I’m over-thinking it again. My grandmother’s favorite: Dumber than the south end of a northbound horse. It made me feel stupid just to have to think it out. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/78 "2009-02-05T08:20:32Z")
> [@Misery Loves Co.](#): > > Thanks to this, I submit: > > "Dumber than a goalie on a dart team " > > as a new “dumber’n” What am I, chopped liver? Hostile Dialect, Hostile Dialect, Unappetizing Dish ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/79 "2009-02-05T15:30:24Z")
> [@VarlosZ](#): > > I generally prefer the “Not the blankest blank in the blank” construction. My favorite is probably “Not the swiftest deer in the forest.” Not the brightest bulb in the hall, we like. ---
**Author:** ![Redfrost](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9fc29f/32.png) [@Redfrost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Redfrost)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2009, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278/80 "2009-02-05T15:37:21Z")
I also like, “Are you naturally that stupid or did you take classes and win an award?” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/dumber-than-a/484278.md?page=5)