# Earl Grey... Hot! **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 18, 2006, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176 "2006-09-18T15:05:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/21 "2006-09-18T16:12:56Z")
Ah, it’s the freaking Future, and not any future, but a care-bear Federation Future. After 500 years of law suits, probably most beverages are served at body temperature or less. Not to mention that the galaxy is crawling with aliens who probably drink their Earl Grey with big chunks of frozen ammonia in. ---
**Author:** ![kellner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c2a13f/32.png) [@kellner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellner)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/22 "2006-09-18T16:18:47Z")
The boring answer is that the whole speech interface is just horribly inconsistent. From one episode to another the capabilities vary from human-level language ability to shittier than real-world systems. Unless they are completely unable to use their own technology optimally, the limitations have to be intentional. Apparently they want their computers to behave unnaturally. Even today you can observe that people react irrationally towards machines that emulate sentient beings. When working with very advanced systems it might make sense to remind people that they aren’t interacting with a person. Holodeck characters have far more natural language ability, so probably it isn’t a technical limitation. kellner, student of computational linguistics ---
**Author:** ![ddgryphon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8c91f0/32.png) [@ddgryphon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ddgryphon)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/23 "2006-09-18T16:24:34Z")
Remember that computer was built and programmed by the lowest bidder. He’s lucky he doesn’t get root beer when he asks for “Earl Grey… Hot!” ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/24 "2006-09-18T16:37:30Z")
I thought the computer’s name was Hot, like Hal in 2001. You know: “Earl Gray, Hot.” ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/25 "2006-09-18T16:44:18Z")
I’ve often wondered what happens to the cups and saucers he gets with every order. When all the closets and crawlspaces are stuffed with dirty dishes and cutlery, do they have to abandon ship? ---
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/26 "2006-09-18T16:49:38Z")
[QUOTE=muldoonthief] As a slight hijack does anyone remember the episode where some visiting dignitary asked Riker for a glass of cold water? Riker, trying to impress the dignitary’s hot bodyguard, looked at her with his best “I’m the studliest guy in the galaxy” look, and said “Computer, a glass of water. (pause for effect) Five degrees.” That’s what every attractive bodyguard is looking for - a guy who can get water any temperature he wants. [/QUOTE] This has me laughing out loud. Soooooo sexy! I’m just glad I’ve already finished my cup of tea (Earl Grey, in fact!) or it would be all over my laptop now! ---
**Author:** ![Lightray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightray/32/391_2.png) [@Lightray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightray)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/27 "2006-09-18T16:50:10Z")
With Picard ordering his tea HOT, and Wesley at the helm, you’d think someone in StarFleet Legal would realize they have a lawsuit waiting to happen of McDonald’s-Coffee-esque proportion. (and you just _know_ those poly pyjamas don’t offer any thermal croch protection. heck, they give out just from the strain of holding in Riker’s gut.) ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/28 "2006-09-18T17:08:31Z")
[QUOTE=Bryan Ekers] I’ve often wondered what happens to the cups and saucers he gets with every order. When all the closets and crawlspaces are stuffed with dirty dishes and cutlery, do they have to abandon ship? [/QUOTE] Now that you mention it, I’ve never seen any scene where such mundane things like dish disposal happened. I suppose I assume that there’s some “universal disintegrator” unit where one pitches their empty hot chocolate mugs or synthehol shot glasses. A side observation is that they sure have cheesey glassware in Ten Forward. It looks like acrylic plastic made into tumblers by a bad craftsman. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/29 "2006-09-18T17:26:08Z")
[QUOTE=teela brown] A side observation is that they sure have cheesey glassware in Ten Forward. It looks like acrylic plastic made into tumblers by a bad craftsman. [/QUOTE] They are recycled into mass for the replicators. The programmer had a thing for carnival glass of the early to mid 20th century. ---
**Author:** ![h.sapiens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e0b2c6/32.png) [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/30 "2006-09-18T17:37:46Z")
In the future, everything will be recycled. Those teacups are made of people! ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/31 "2006-09-18T17:41:42Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] But he’s the _Captain_. Surely the Captain should be able to have stuff? I know I’d surely want it! [/QUOTE] Well in that case “Make it so” ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/32 "2006-09-18T17:46:35Z")
[QUOTE=teela brown] Now that you mention it, I’ve never seen any scene where such mundane things like dish disposal happened. I suppose I assume that there’s some “universal disintegrator” unit where one pitches their empty hot chocolate mugs or synthehol shot glasses. [/QUOTE] Actually, this is covered in _Deep Space Nine_. Molly O’Brien had finished eating, and Keiko told her to put her dishes away. Little Molly takes them to the replicator, and the dishes are dematerialized. I would assume since the food is fake and materialized out of pre-set patterns, the dishes are too. Now, trivia time…how does O’Brien take his coffee? ---
**Author:** ![Eonwe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eonwe/32/240_2.png) [@Eonwe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eonwe)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/33 "2006-09-18T18:01:10Z")
[QUOTE=ivylass] Actually, this is covered in _Deep Space Nine_. Molly O’Brien had finished eating, and Keiko told her to put her dishes away. Little Molly takes them to the replicator, and the dishes are dematerialized. I would assume since the food is fake and materialized out of pre-set patterns, the dishes are too. Now, trivia time…how does O’Brien take his coffee? [/QUOTE] Wow, a convenient evidence-disposal unit in every kitchen, eh? Got a bloody knife you need to get rid of? Stick it in the dematerializer! Maybe you’re sick of your baby brother, or your cat? _poof!_ ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/34 "2006-09-18T18:04:09Z")
[QUOTE=Shoshana] "Earl Grey…hot. In a 6-oz. cup.\* Oriented spatially to conform to “right-side-up.” [/QUOTE] “Engage.” ---
**Author:** ![SiXSwordS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/49beb7/32.png) [@SiXSwordS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SiXSwordS)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/35 "2006-09-18T18:09:43Z")
[QUOTE=ivylass] Now, trivia time…how does O’Brien take his coffee? [/QUOTE] Computer, I like my coffee like I like my women… Maybe not. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/36 "2006-09-18T18:10:46Z")
> [@Monstre](#): > > > [@Shoshana](#): > > > > "Earl Grey…hot. In a 6-oz. cup.\* Oriented spatially to conform to “right-side-up.” > > “Engage.” “Set a course for… my tummy!” [QUOTE=ivylass] I would assume since the food is fake and materialized out of pre-set patterns, the dishes are too. [/quote] You know, if the dishes are destroyed as well as the food, the station should be lighter after mealtime! That puts a new spin on [this Straight Dope classic](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a3_144.html), doesn’t it? [QUOTE=ivylass] Now, trivia time…how does O’Brien take his coffee? [/QUOTE] I’m not going to go there, but I have to say this is begging for some offensive Irish jokes. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/37 "2006-09-18T18:11:43Z")
[QUOTE=Eonwe] Wow, a convenient evidence-disposal unit in every kitchen, eh? Got a bloody knife you need to get rid of? Stick it in the dematerializer! Maybe you’re sick of your baby brother, or your cat? _poof!_ [/QUOTE] They are most likely set to not work on things that are alive. As to the evidence disposal, the replicators work partially on transporter technology which keeps a log of what goes through it. So by putting that bloody knife in there, you have not only NOT gotten rid of evidence but have actually now made a readily duplicatable version of it for convenient reproduction. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/38 "2006-09-18T18:27:20Z")
[QUOTE=Marley23 I’m not going to go there, but I have to say this is begging for some offensive Irish jokes.[/QUOTE] Come on…there’s a real answer to this!!! And you call yourselves Trekophiles. Honestly…I’m ashamed to wear my pointy ears around you guys. ---
**Author:** ![phungi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phungi/32/395_2.png) [@phungi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phungi)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/39 "2006-09-18T18:28:29Z")
perhaps he once was served by a [Punk Rock Girl](http://www.deadmilkmen.com/lyrics/punk_rock_girl.html) who serrved him _iced_. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [September 18, 2006, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176/40 "2006-09-18T18:29:17Z")
[QUOTE=Cat Jones] ..we’re just back from a fortnight in the States and I had to teach myself to ask for “hot tea” (to avoid any confusion with Pearl Tea / Ice Tea etc.).. [/QUOTE] Drinking hot tea, instead of iced tea, is the scriptwriters way of making Jean-Luc European, without making him annoying. They could also have given him American taste and an French accent, (think Michèl in Gilmore Girls) but that would have gotten old fast. “Computèr, è Budwesèr, lightely chilled.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earl-grey-hot/373176.md?page=3)