# Early dating stages and you're at their place. Do you look in the medicine cabinet? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 7, 2011, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572 "2011-04-07T19:58:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/6/e19adc/32.png) [@6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2011, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/101 "2011-04-10T07:28:48Z")
Right. From now on, the only thing I’m keeping in my medicine cabinet is a family of funnel webs. Not because, you know, I don’t have any boundaries or anything; but because “I’m just curious.” ---
**Author:** ![Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Springtime_for_Spacers)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2011, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/102 "2011-04-10T10:56:22Z")
I voted “No” because I’m not a snooper. However a couple of things for full disclosure: my SO and I had a conversation comparing our meds really early on. And I can’t resist opening (already open and on display) bottles of shampoo and shower gel to see how they smell. ---
**Author:** ![rbroome](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/838e76/32.png) [@rbroome](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rbroome)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2011, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/103 "2011-04-10T13:22:38Z")
> [@Rigamarole](#): > > I don’t want to bias this too much so I’ll pretty much let the question stand as it is. You’re in a new relationship and find yourself at the person’s house/apartment for the first time. You use the restroom. Do you look in the medicine cabinet? > > Tell the truth. Only if invited. and that would be weird. I have no business invading another’s privacy. It would not be appropriate. ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2011, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/104 "2011-04-10T13:31:54Z")
> [@rbroome](#): > > Only if invited. and that would be weird. I have no business invading another’s privacy. It would not be appropriate. “_Hey sweetie, while you’re in there why don’t you have a peek inside my medicine cabinet wink wink_” I’d be hoping there’s a window in the bathroom so I could climb out of it. ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2011, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/105 "2011-04-10T14:16:39Z")
I’m starting to feel like I should make a “Dear Men” video. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/106 "2011-04-11T16:18:28Z")
> [@OpalCat](#): > > I hope you made him pay for what he’d used, too! What a dickface! No, I’m sorry to report that I didn’t even think of getting reimbursed for what he used. Mostly, I was just all about gettin’ his ass outta our beach house. ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/107 "2011-04-11T16:53:42Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > Yep, this reminds me of a story I’ve told on this board before. Two high school friends of mine got married after graduation and went to a hotel to start their honeymoon. A couple of hours later, the female friend left the male friend and filed for divorce. > > Anyone who thinks I’m not curious what happened is crazy. I’m incredibly curious. But I recognize that it’s none of my business and I don’t have that sort of relationship with either of them. Micropenis. ---
**Author:** ![Daerlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Daerlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daerlyn)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/108 "2011-04-11T19:00:57Z")
I voted no. Not because I’m not nosy (although I try to keep it restrained to asking obnoxious questions rather than snooping through people’s stuff), but because I apparently haven’t dated enough crazy to find anything interesting in the medicine cabinet. ---
**Author:** ![perfectparanoia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a5b964/32.png) [@perfectparanoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/perfectparanoia)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/109 "2011-04-11T19:09:44Z")
> [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](#): > > Even so, you’re already in snoop mode so you might end up seeing some. I’m curious; while admiring your host’s taste in dental floss, what would you do if you happen to innocently notice a big prescription bottle full of something called Tegretol? I don’t know what that is (nor would I know most meds) and I don’t care (and even if I did, I would forget the name). ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/110 "2011-04-11T19:28:40Z")
> [@Daerlyn](#): > > I voted no. Not because I’m not nosy (although I try to keep it restrained to asking obnoxious questions rather than snooping through people’s stuff), but because I apparently haven’t dated enough crazy to find anything interesting in the medicine cabinet. How do you know if you haven’t looked? 😕 (I’m not saying you SHOULD look, just wondering how you know) ---
**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/111 "2011-04-11T19:37:44Z")
> [@OpalCat](#): > > How do you know if you haven’t looked? 😕 (I’m not saying you SHOULD look, just wondering how you know) What someone’s taking to control the “crazies” might actually be \*controlling \*the crazies. Finding a certain medicine in their cabinet doesn’t mean its for them. Perhaps granny forgot her pills on her last visit? Maybe it’s something for the dog or cat? What makes you think you know enough about medicine and psychiatry to decide someone is “damaged goods” just because you saw “medicine X” in his/her medicine cabinet? I suggest if that’s why you’re looking, they’re better off without you. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/112 "2011-04-11T20:19:42Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > I’m puzzled by the folks who say they wouldn’t even want their spouse looking through the medicine cabinet. Don’t most houses only have one? Presumably, both husband and wife will need a place to store meds… Don’t you generally share the same one? Nah, it’s less confusing if we keep them separate. But it’s not a confidentiality thing, it’s just easier to keep things organized if we each have our own space for meds. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/113 "2011-04-11T22:21:35Z")
> [@SSgtBaloo](#): > > What someone’s taking to control the “crazies” might actually be \*controlling \*the crazies. Finding a certain medicine in their cabinet doesn’t mean its for them. Perhaps granny forgot her pills on her last visit? Maybe it’s something for the dog or cat? What makes you think you know enough about medicine and psychiatry to decide someone is “damaged goods” just because you saw “medicine X” in his/her medicine cabinet? > > I suggest if that’s why you’re looking, they’re better off without you. I’m not sure why you quoted me, since you don’t seem to be replying to me. On the off chance you are replying to me: I said that I didn’t think they should look. (And I voted that I don’t look in the poll) ---
**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2011, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/114 "2011-04-11T23:57:17Z")
> [@OpalCat](#): > > I’m not sure why you quoted me, since you don’t seem to be replying to me. On the off chance you are replying to me: I said that I didn’t think they should look. (And I voted that I don’t look in the poll) It might’ve been a multi-reply where I forgot what I was going to say specifically for that quote, so I just went on and said what I was going to say anyhow. Sorry about the confusion. Seriously, if somebody went through my medicine bag I doubt they’d recognize many of the meds I take unless they were pharmacists (or were taking these meds themselves). I take stuff to control anxiety and depression (in addition to other things). Does that mean I’m crazy? To a layperson it might, so if it scares off a potential mate, I’m probably better off without that person in my life. ---
**Author:** ![Daerlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Daerlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daerlyn)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2011, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/115 "2011-04-12T00:07:50Z")
> [@OpalCat](#): > > How do you know if you haven’t looked? 😕 (I’m not saying you SHOULD look, just wondering how you know) Perhaps I should have rephrased that to “all the crazy I’ve dated has been obvious enough from publicly visible objects/behaviour”. Either way, the medicine cabinet has never struck me as a particularly interesting place to start looking. ---
**Author:** ![Sally\_Mander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e56c9b/32.png) [@Sally\_Mander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sally_Mander)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2011, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/116 "2011-04-12T12:02:14Z")
> [@SSgtBaloo](#): > > Finding a certain medicine in their cabinet doesn’t mean its for them. Perhaps granny forgot her pills on her last visit? Maybe it’s something for the dog or cat? If it’s a prescription medication, it would be labeled with their name. If there’s an anti-fungal cream that has a label saying it’s for Fluffy McWhiskerson, I’ll assume it’s for the cat. ---
**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2011, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/117 "2011-04-12T19:13:24Z")
> [@YoSaffBridge](#): > > If it’s a prescription medication, it would be labeled with their name. If there’s an anti-fungal cream that has a label saying it’s for Fluffy McWhiskerson, I’ll assume it’s for the cat. It’s still unethical to obtain that information without permission, regardless. It’s a violation of the trust of the person the medicine cabinet belongs to. Just because it’s not locked doesn’t mean you are justified in looking anyway. If you went somewhere and forgot to lock your door, would that give your boyfriend/girlfriend permission to enter the place and go through your things while you weren’t present? ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2011, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/118 "2011-04-12T19:19:32Z")
I have never done this, and have never even thought of doing this. Not that it’s because I’m not particularly snoopy–I can be. It’s just that it’s never occurred to me to do so, and I’m not sure I’d do anything interesting with that information. ---
**Author:** ![Sally\_Mander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e56c9b/32.png) [@Sally\_Mander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sally_Mander)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2011, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/119 "2011-04-12T19:31:47Z")
> [@SSgtBaloo](#): > > It’s still unethical to obtain that information without permission, regardless. It’s a violation of the trust of the person the medicine cabinet belongs to. Just because it’s not locked doesn’t mean you are justified in looking anyway. Yes, I know. I’m actually agreeing with you, in a way (I think). Finding medication in your new SO’s medicine cabinet doesn’t necessarily mean it’s for them. If it had someone else’s name on it, I wouldn’t assume they were using it. Of course, if it does have their name on it, obviously it’s theirs. At any rate, I wouldn’t look in someone’s medicine cabinet unless I was looking for something specific, like an aspirin. And I’d ask first. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [April 12, 2011, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572/120 "2011-04-12T20:05:26Z")
> [@neuroman](#): > > Micropenis. I bet I can think of six other reasons without trying hard. Let’s see: 1. MACROpenis. It’s not a problem I’m afflicted with, but I’m informed that penises can easily be too big for a woman’s comfort, or even her lack of pain. 2. The bride, on the honeymoon, accepted that she was a lesbian. 3. The groom, on the honeymoon, accepted that he was gay. 4. The groom, on the honeymood, admitted that while he loved sex with women, he could only be really satisfied if he were wearing woman’s dress beforehand and women’s undies during. 5. The bride, once protected by spousall privilege, told the groom about her extensive criminal pst. 6. Either of them slept with a wedding guest at the wedding, or a hotelier on the honeymoon, or so forth, and was discovered. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/early-dating-stages-and-youre-at-their-place-do-you-look-in-the-medicine-cabinet/577572.md?page=5)