# Earth to Dr. Laura! Earth to Dr. Laura!! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 1, 2003, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935 "2003-10-01T16:05:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Bruce\_Daddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/85f322/32.png) [@Bruce\_Daddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bruce_Daddy)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/21 "2003-10-01T17:34:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \* > \*\*Personally, I hate the term “put out” - it sounds like a chore or a distasteful obligation. I think a couple needs to find what works for their marriage, and if there’s a wide gulf between their expectations, they may need to get help to bridge the gulf. But to have to “do one’s duty” reduces lovemaking to the level of a household job. And if one spouse is willing to have the other one in that “dutiful” position, there are issues and problems that I’m not qualified to address. \*\* Agreed. There is a word for using sex as a commodity. Hence the phrases “Give it up” “put out” “get some” should be erased. I don’t want to have sex with anybody that doesn’t want to have sex with me for the sole purpose of having sex with me. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/22 "2003-10-01T17:39:05Z")
When I saw the thread title I had a faint hope that NASA had directed a Schlessinger-bearing rocket into the sun in order to determine whether or not massive stupidity has any measurable effect on the process of nuclear fission. I haven’t been this disappointed since yesterday afternoon, when it became clear that 6X infanticide Jay Handel’s leaving a B.C. courtroom on a stretcher with the blanket pulled up over his face was the result of nothing more serious than a fainting spell. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/23 "2003-10-01T17:47:47Z")
I know it’s not relevant but it pains me to see that so conspicuously close to “massive stupidity.” :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/24 "2003-10-01T17:50:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lil ol me\_? \* > \*\*emmm… > > [http://www.rslevinson.com/gaylesissues/features/collect/newsnotes/bl\_newsnote0016.htm](http://www.rslevinson.com/gaylesissues/features/collect/newsnotes/bl_newsnote0016.htm) \*\* emmm… Link doesn’t work. ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/25 "2003-10-01T18:56:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \* > \*\* I think a couple needs to find what works for their marriage, and if there’s a wide gulf between their expectations, they may need to get help to bridge the gulf. \*\* Might this “bridge” take the form of a drop dead georgous 18 year old redhead and her bisexual twin sister? I’m dying to know. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/26 "2003-10-01T19:06:06Z")
Gee, **Weirddave** , that’s a tough call. Maybe we need to see what Dr. Laura has to say on the matter. ---
**Author:** ![RedNaxela](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ad7895/32.png) [@RedNaxela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedNaxela)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/27 "2003-10-01T19:36:01Z")
**lil ol me\_?** , it may interest you to know that this letter has been discussed a number of times on the SDMB, and its various points have been pretty well debunked (from an Orthodox Jewish POV, at least, which is what Dr. Laura claims to be speaking for) by some of our knowledgeable Jewish Dopers, [cmkeller](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=484852#post484852) and [zev\_steinhardt](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=488160#post488160). Re the OP: from a Jewish POV, Dr. Laura actually has it backwards. In Jewish law, this obligation rests mainly on the husband, who is required - circumstances permitting, of course - to satisfy his wife, at minimum, at regular intervals (the exact interval depends on his stamina and how often he’s in town); AFAIK, there is no corresponding obligation on the wife to “put out on demand.” (However, unreasonable refusal by either party to have relations for an extended period of time can be grounds for divorce.) ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/28 "2003-10-01T20:11:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chicago Faucet \* > \*\*Actually, the link gives the proper context. > > [strawman] > So, Fairy, you don’t think women should have to put out once in a while? And, Juanita, sex is just as obsolete as knitting? > [/strawman] > > I’m actually in a sex starved marriage, so this hits a raw nerve with me. \*\* Well, frankly, I don’t think anyone should _have_ to have sex with anyone. Sex should always be something that you freely choose to do because that’s what you both want to do. I think that not _wanting_ to have sex with your spouse for a long period of time is a big flashing red light that there’s a problem of some sort somewhere. And I think **Juanita** is talking about the gender roles and the idea of bartering your body for certain behaviors being outdated, not sex itself. On the bright side, though, I work and bring home money, and **DrJ** has this one uncle who’s a real pain in the ass, so I ought to up to my eyeballs in sex. ---
**Author:** ![IzzyR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/2acd7d/32.png) [@IzzyR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IzzyR)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/29 "2003-10-01T20:50:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by RedNaxela \* > from a Jewish POV, Dr. Laura actually has it backwards. In Jewish law, this obligation rests mainly on the husband, who is required - circumstances permitting, of course - to satisfy his wife, at minimum, at regular intervals (the exact interval depends on his stamina and how often he’s in town); AFAIK, there is no corresponding obligation on the wife to “put out on demand.” I don’t think this is correct. The difference in obligation between husband and wife is more technical than practical. The husband’s is more in the nature of religious commandment; the wife’s more in the nature of contractual obligation (these are not precise descriptions). Neither is required to “put out on demand”, but both need to be willing to try to conform to regular standards (barring health or other issues, obviously). In general, it is a mistake to associate Dr. Laura’s statements with Orthodox Jewry - her association with this religion was short lived and she was probably never too informed about it. It seems to me that she seized on this religion because it seemed in line with her overall conservative social perspective, and rejected it when its members and leaders failed to back her up in her battles against her liberal enemies. I suspect she will now become a fundamentalist Christian. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/30 "2003-10-01T20:55:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Weirddave \* > \*\*Might this “bridge” take the form of a drop dead georgous 18 year old redhead and her bisexual twin sister? I’m dying to know. > 😛 \*\* Er, um…wouldn’t that be Incest? ---
**Author:** ![Weirddave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/919ad9/32.png) [@Weirddave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weirddave)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/31 "2003-10-01T21:04:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Chimera \* > \*\*Er, um…wouldn’t that be Incest? \*\* Well, not for _me_… ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [October 1, 2003, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/32 "2003-10-01T23:46:32Z")
What’s great about Dr. Laura is that her doctorate is in physiology. This means that in her expertise, she can give advice about sex positions, as well as defining norms of marital sexual relations. Who knew that physiology made one a relations and ethics expert? ---
**Author:** ![PatriotX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@PatriotX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatriotX)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/33 "2003-10-02T00:10:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by moriah \* > \*\* > Who knew that physiology made one a relations and ethics expert? > \*\* Laura Schlessinger did. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/34 "2003-10-02T03:05:11Z")
Maybe I will show the link to my wife and she can tell me what I’m supposed to think about it. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/35 "2003-10-02T03:37:54Z")
Anyone else highly amused at the notion of **JDT** meeting Dr. Laura?😃 ---
**Author:** ![G-RAY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@G-RAY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G-RAY)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/36 "2003-10-02T03:59:39Z")
Wow I didnt know she still had a show. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/37 "2003-10-02T05:09:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by iampunha \* > \*\*Anyone else highly amused at the notion of **JDT** meeting Dr. Laura?😃 \*\* 😃 😃 ---
**Author:** ![PatriotX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@PatriotX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatriotX)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/38 "2003-10-02T11:40:49Z")
I give up, who’s JDT? ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/39 "2003-10-02T11:48:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by iampunha \* > \*\*Anyone else highly amused at the notion of **JDT** meeting Dr. Laura?😃 \*\* Who? Is that the weird guy with all the penis threads? ---
**Author:** ![SnoopyFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d07c76/32.png) [@SnoopyFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnoopyFan)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2003, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935/40 "2003-10-02T12:43:46Z")
**CrazyCatLady** you’ve always struck me as a reasonable person (no, really). I can hardly think that a NY Post reporter can be trusted to give an objective account of what the book really says. Maybe we can read it at the same time when it comes out, start a thread about it and discuss it? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/earth-to-dr-laura-earth-to-dr-laura/204935.md?page=3)