# Easier to tell gay women or gay men?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085>\
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion\
**Created:** [May 3, 2002, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085 "2002-05-03T15:45:13Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 8\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![FriendRob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecc23a/32.png) [@FriendRob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriendRob)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/1 "2002-05-03T15:45:13Z")

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[This thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=112988) got me wondering about the above question. I have a hard time IDing gay men unless they are “flaming”, but gay women seem to be easier. My theory is that they sometimes acquire a habit of not looking at or smiling at men, in order to avoid unwanted attention.

Before I get slammed for stereotyping, I want to add that this is definitely _not_ true of many of my gay women friends (of whom I seem to have an inordinate number - what’s the male equvalent of a “fag hag” - a “dyke tyke”?), but it seems to be true for a significant proportion.

Comments?

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**Author:** ![Tansu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/2 "2002-05-03T16:11:20Z")

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I apologise in advance for this:

Easier to tell them what?

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**Author:** ![Dr.Lao](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2bfe46/32.png) [@Dr.Lao](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Lao)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/3 "2002-05-03T16:30:25Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Tansu \*  
> \*\*Easier to tell them what? \*\*

Easier to tell that they are gay. “Tell” meaning “determine” or “figure out.” I wonder if this is an Americanism?

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**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/4 "2002-05-03T16:56:23Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Dr. Lao \*  
> \*\*Easier to tell that they are gay. “Tell” meaning “determine” or “figure out.” I wonder if this is an Americanism? \*\*

\< hijack \> It’s probably shortened from “tell them apart from.” (ie/ “They’re twins! Can you tell them apart?”) \< /hijack \>

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**Author:** ![Tansu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/5 "2002-05-03T20:56:41Z")

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Sorry, all, I was being flippant.

Sorry.

_slinks away_

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**Author:** ![Dr.Lao](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2bfe46/32.png) [@Dr.Lao](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Lao)\
**Post date:** [May 3, 2002, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/6 "2002-05-03T23:27:01Z")

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No need to apologize, I was just terribly whooshed.

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**Author:** ![bagkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ab992/32.png) [@bagkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bagkitty)\
**Post date:** [May 4, 2002, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/7 "2002-05-04T05:57:25Z")

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There there Tansu, at least some of us found your post amusing:p

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**Author:** ![Calliope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Calliope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calliope)\
**Post date:** [May 4, 2002, 6:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easier-to-tell-gay-women-or-gay-men/107085/8 "2002-05-04T06:12:25Z")

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Are you differentiating strictly lesbian women from bisexual women? Because I’ll bet you a dollar you cannot tell a bisexual woman from a heterosexual woman.