# Easiest way to start a cult? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 15, 2004, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236 "2004-07-15T10:35:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lemon\_martini2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@lemon\_martini2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lemon_martini2)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/1 "2004-07-15T10:35:45Z")
I want a load of people worshipping me,obeying my commands,donating me money/gifts/their worldly goods.What’s the easiest way to start it? ---
**Author:** ![Aeschines](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aeschines/32/16251_2.png) [@Aeschines](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aeschines)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 10:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/2 "2004-07-15T10:43:27Z")
A cult-ure! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/3 "2004-07-15T11:00:33Z")
1. Write load of really bad science fiction books. 2. ? 3. PROFIT! ---
**Author:** ![Shade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2bfe46/32.png) [@Shade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shade)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/4 "2004-07-15T12:22:55Z")
I believe rising from the dead should do the trick. But don’t try this at home. ---
**Author:** ![Dragwyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dragwyr/32/2855_2.png) [@Dragwyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dragwyr)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/5 "2004-07-15T12:52:14Z")
[This site seems to have a pretty straight forward method](http://www.siue.edu/~patchis/cult.htm) for doing this. ---
**Author:** ![noname](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/58f4c7/32.png) [@noname](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/noname)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/6 "2004-07-15T12:53:22Z")
Stand on a platform and shout one of these: 1- The end is near!! 2- They dont care about us. ---
**Author:** ![Who\_me\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/958977/32.png) [@Who\_me\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Who_me_1)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2004, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/7 "2004-07-15T13:05:56Z")
My friends… just come and listen to me and I shall tell you the truths that have been kept from you. Salvation is within your grasp, Just send me $19.99 in a SASE so I can buy the farmhouse and land. Then, my children, you may all come and live with me and mine and hear the truths of the ages… Offer not valid with any other special offer. This offer also not valid in the real world 😉 ---
**Author:** ![TJdude825](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@TJdude825](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TJdude825)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 10:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/8 "2004-07-16T10:13:13Z")
Make a “cult classic” movie, perhaps? ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 12:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/9 "2004-07-16T12:43:07Z")
This is suited better to MPSIMS, so off we go. **samclem** GQ moderator ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/10 "2004-07-16T13:40:13Z")
I _strongly_ recommend you read the book [Join Me](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0452285011/qid=1089985098/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/002-8426565-1708820?v=glance&s=books) by Danny Wallace (link is to it’s listing on Amazon). He basically did what you are asking - put an ad in a newspaper saying “Join Me” with no further explanation. And before long, he had his own cult. The fact that he is very funny and an excellent writer makes the book a surprisingly enjoyable read. Entirely worth it. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/11 "2004-07-16T13:43:48Z")
If you **do** start a Cult, please use Tiki Idols. We **alway** s need more Tiki Idols. And Moai! Don’t forget the Moai! Temple girls in skimpy grass skirts are good, too. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Somnambulist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ed655f/32.png) [@Somnambulist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Somnambulist)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/12 "2004-07-16T15:19:26Z")
Ever get the sense that you are ambling through your life in your sleep? Repeat after me: Those that sleep get left behind. Mind that grows; Mind that thinks Mind you find those hidden links That bind us closer in the mind; All the walkers of our kind. When you’re ready to wake up contact me. You’ll know when. ---
**Author:** ![brane\_damaj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a587f6/32.png) [@brane\_damaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brane_damaj)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/13 "2004-07-16T15:25:15Z")
I’d go for the money back guarantee. It worked for the Church of the Subgenius. “Eternal Salvation or TRIPLE your money back!” ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/14 "2004-07-16T17:24:24Z")
> [@Bosda Di'Chi of Tricor](#): > > If you **do** start a Cult, please use Tiki Idols. > > We **alway** s need more Tiki Idols. > > And Moai! Don’t forget the Moai! > > Temple girls in skimpy grass skirts are good, too. 🆒 And decorate the temples with [this guy’s](http://www.shag.com/) art! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![ftg](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ftg/32/2801_2.png) [@ftg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ftg)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2004, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/15 "2004-07-16T19:14:55Z")
Well, to actually answer some of the OP, there are 3 basic steps: 1. Be charismatic. Not all that easy to do. OTOH, if Charles Manson can be viewed as charismatic, maybe anyone can. Note that you really have to believe in yourself to an overwhelming degree. You have never, nor will ever make a mistake. Always have ready answers to every possible objection or fact someone might bring to your attention. 2. Find an exploitable subgroup. A category of people on the fringe of society who feel alienated and long to join in with others of a like mind. Since most such subgroups have already been taken over, the pickings are slim. I don’t believe goth teens have a Cult Leader yet. Try them. 3. Do all the usual cult things. Keep members away from old friends and family. Control all aspects of their lives, including eating and sleeping. Etc. Note that you have to have a step-by-step “conquer the world” strategy. Start small and work your way up. E.g., start a small “answer life’s Big Questions” column in a weekly paper under a pseudonym. Once your fan mail indicates a loyal following, start up an Internet message board for them. When that gets big enough, start charging fees to fund further expansion. (We won’t know what the next step is for a year or two.) ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/16 "2004-07-17T05:16:35Z")
The 2)? in Hubbard’s case would be- devise relatively easy but at least superficially effective form of emotional therapy that’ll get people hooked when they experience short-term emotional relief. Dianetics is all about rehearsing the traumatic events of your past over & over till they cease to be traumatic & just become boring. ---
**Author:** ![lemon\_martini2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@lemon\_martini2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lemon_martini2)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 10:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/17 "2004-07-17T10:33:08Z")
> [@WordMan](#): > > I _strongly_ recommend you read the book [Join Me](http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0452285011/qid=1089985098/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/002-8426565-1708820?v=glance&s=books) by Danny Wallace (link is to it’s listing on Amazon). > > He basically did what you are asking - put an ad in a newspaper saying “Join Me” with no further explanation. And before long, he had his own cult. The fact that he is very funny and an excellent writer makes the book a surprisingly enjoyable read. Entirely worth it. That’s what started it-reading that.If he can do it accidentally,I wanna do it too like him(but without copyright problems 😉 ) ---
**Author:** ![lemon\_martini2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3be4f8/32.png) [@lemon\_martini2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lemon_martini2)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2004, 10:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/easiest-way-to-start-a-cult/255236/18 "2004-07-17T10:35:11Z")
> [@ftg](#): > > Note that you have to have a step-by-step “conquer the world” strategy. Start small and work your way up. E.g., start a small “answer life’s Big Questions” column in a weekly paper under a pseudonym. Once your fan mail indicates a loyal following, start up an Internet message board for them. When that gets big enough, start charging fees to fund further expansion. (We won’t know what the next step is for a year or two.) OMG.I’ve discovered the secret.This is not just a message board.You plan to lure me into your sinister cult.You SHALL NOT have my soul…YOU SHALL NOT!!!