I’m tempted to curse at you.
I was on the phone when I read this and had to stifle a laugh.
Edited to add: Oh Lawd, I can’t read this thread right now! 
Bookmarked for later.
Yeah, hogs’ll do that.
I remember going down the road from my grandmother’s place as a wee tot, to visit her neighbor who raised hogs. My Dad threatened major mayhem if we kids got near the pens without him; he knew we didn’t understand how dangerous they are, but he (farmboy that he was) sure as hell did.
By the same hogs? If so, I say destroy the beasts at once!!
So the hog says, ‘You know, in the South Seas they call us “short humans”.’
Yes, all except for the foreskin.
Good to see that “Went to shit and the hogs ate him.” isn’t just an empty expression.
Sounds like the farmer made a mistake by keeping them too long. They should have been sold at auction or butchered long before they got that size. Even smaller hogs are dangerous if someone has a heart attack or stroke and passes out in the pen.
We have serious problems in my region with wild hogs. They have tusks and are extremely dangerous.
don’t seem right to me.
each getting half a hog would have been cheaper and they would have got the wallet back.
This could be an episode of “Grimm”!
My grand-dad told me a story about a barn fire they had when he was young. A bunch of horses died. Rather than cart off the carcasses, they drove the pigs over to the wreckage and the porkers got to have a horsemeat smorgasbord. Afterwards, they only had to take away the bones and the pigs were in hog heaven, so to speak.
From Snatch:
Brick Top: You’re always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.
Sol: Would someone mind telling me, who are you?
Brick Top: And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it’s no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies’ digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don’t want to go sievin’ through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, “as greedy as a pig”.
Vinny: Well, thank you for that. That’s a great weight off me mind. Now, if you wouldn’t mind telling me who the fuck you are, apart from someone who feeds people to pigs of course?
.. body and soul too. Reminds me of the breakfast saying: The hen was involved but the hog was committed.
So why didn’t they just kill the pig right away and recover the wallet in 5 minutes and then butcher the pig ?
Oh yeah. When we were on my family’s ranch as kids we were always cautioned about the pigs, which were kind of scary aggressive to us anyway.
We were allowed free rein around the ranch, with the enormous bull, the welding shop, the farm machinery (I first drove a tractor at the age of 8), the untrustworthy and irritable horses, the rickety barn with its many scurrying inhabitants and dangerous substances stored there, the irrigation canals with swift running water - all kinds of hazards to little kids. But those pigs - they were something to be wary of.
One of the frightening moments I remember is one day as a young kid playing in the hay loft with my younger brother in my uncle’s barn when all of a sudden he fell through the chute and landed into a pen with these enormous grunting and squeeling hogs. He got the hell out of there fast.
Now I understand why the farmhands in Wizard of Oz freaked out so much when Dorothy fell into the hog pen. And why Dorothy was so stupid to use the fence post as a balance beam in the first place.
I was thinking kind of this, and kind of something more surreal involving shattering the beast with a hammer.
Getting dangerously off-topic, but that scene has one of the most peculiar lines of dialog I’ve ever heard. Something to the effect of:
“…you’ll worry those hogs into anemia”.
Somehow, the presence of a teenage girl near their pen will (a) distress the pigs, which will then (b) cause their iron levels to drop dangerously low. 
Like a piggy bank ? 
I’d say they’re experts at human consumption.