# Elementary school serves floor sealant to students instead of milk **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 16, 2022, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304 "2022-06-16T15:04:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2022, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/81 "2022-06-18T01:55:27Z")
Yes, it is a very real problem, and Tide refuses to fix it… > **[An Anthropologist Explains Why We Want to Eat Tide Pods](https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/tide-pod-tasty-toxic-laundry)** > > But you really shouldn't swallow laundry tablets. _But it’s not uncommon to make candy colorful, even blue, in order to attract children. That association never really goes away, even for adults, Allen says. For many people, the colors of Tide Pods don’t imply “Danger, Do Not Eat,” but suggest instead a large Gusher candy, which are often brightly colored. Colors are extremely important in helping young children [understand the world](http://www.slate.com/articles/life/family/2012/04/small_childr%20en_and_favorite_colors_research_into_why_colors_are_so_important_to_kids_identity_.html), including what is and isn’t food._ ---
**Author:** ![Northern\_Piper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/northern_piper/32/5304_2.png) [@Northern\_Piper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Northern_Piper)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2022, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/82 "2022-06-18T02:40:23Z")
> [@DesertDog](#): > > Given the choice I think I’d rather eat semen-tainted dressing than floor sealant milk. Only on the Straight Dope does one find commentary like this. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2022, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/83 "2022-06-18T04:06:53Z")
> [@Asuka](#): > > Well at least this wasnt that incident a few years ago where a high school student before school ejaculated in the ranch dressing tub that was to be used for the school lunches salads, and it was only caught after multiple students complained the ranch tastes funny. I dunno, a lovin’ spoonful (as it were) doesn’t seem like it would change the flavor of a five-gallon tub of ranch dressing noticeably. ---
**Author:** ![Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/q.q.switcheroo/32/5713_2.png) [@Q.Q.Switcheroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.Q.Switcheroo)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2022, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/84 "2022-06-18T18:31:24Z")
[Thurl Ravenscroft voice:] Given the choice between the two of them, I think I’d rather eat semen-tainted dressing… 🎶 **than floor sealant milk!!!** 🎶 ---
**Author:** ![Asuka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dec6dc/32.png) [@Asuka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asuka)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2022, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/85 "2022-06-18T23:31:45Z")
If they didn’t bother to remix it I imagine you could accidentally get some “choice” samples at the very top of the ranch tub. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2022, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/86 "2022-06-19T13:18:30Z")
> [@Northern\_Piper](#): > > Only on the Straight Dope does one find commentary like this.   This is, after all, a subject that The Straight Dope has delved into before. **Cecil** Hisself discussed the nutritional composition: [How many calories are in the average male ejaculation?](https://www.straightdope.com/21341232/how-many-calories-are-in-the-average-male-ejaculation) Cecil compares the stuff to raw egg white, so including some in a batch of Ranch Dressing apparently isn’t so far out there. ETA: This is the very sort of subject matter that distinguished The Straight Dope. Cecil stood out in his willingness to cover topics that, e.g., Marilyn would never touch. ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2022, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/87 "2022-06-19T15:25:56Z")
And then, of course, there was this infamous thread: > [@Pan-fried Semen](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/pan-fried-semen/189460): > > Hey folks… Remember the Cecil column about the comparison between semen and egg white? Well, it started me to a-thinkin’… What would happen if you fried semen in a pan? Would it solidify like egg white? Would sit sizzle and pop, and evaporate, leaving sticky resin? I would try the experiment myself, but my wife would at the very least kick my ass, and at worst… well, lets not go there. ---
**Author:** ![Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/son_of_a_rich/32/5439_2.png) [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Son_of_a_Rich)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2022, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/88 "2022-06-19T16:27:08Z")
You can’t get them to eat vegetables, but they’ll drink floor sealant. Reminds me of a little neighbor kid who downed a bottle of aspirin and needed a stomach pump. You’d think the god awful taste would be preventative enough. ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2022, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/89 "2022-06-19T18:06:10Z")
Oleander grows here in Arizona and the leaves and sticks are poisonous, to the point eating a hot dog impaled and roasted on one can cause gastric distress. There are also tales of small kids eating the leaves and having trouble. When I was about twelve my pediatrician mentioned in passing he’d sampled some oleander leaves and they were so bitter he regarded the latter as a myth. I was thinking, “Ever hear of aspirin poisoning?” as I smiled and nodded. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2022, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/90 "2022-06-19T22:10:45Z")
If candy comes in all different colors, then what could Tide do to fix it? No matter what color they change it to, it still could be candy. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2022, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/91 "2022-06-19T22:12:19Z")
IIRC, the plain white ones are not as attractive. ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2022, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/92 "2022-06-19T22:12:37Z")
> [@Son\_of\_a\_Rich](#): > > Reminds me of a little neighbor kid who downed a bottle of aspirin and needed a stomach pump. You’d think the god awful taste would be preventative enough. Do they still make the orange flavored chewable children’s aspirin? When I was about five I gave my parents a scare when they found I had eaten them like candy. Luckily, my mom found me and stopped me after I had about eight of them. This being the seventies, they figured that stopping me was enough, no trip to the hospital or anything like that. IIRC, I survived. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2022, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/93 "2022-06-20T00:09:44Z")
> [@Atamasama](#): > > What kind of candy are you eating that looks like a Tide pod?! > [@Riemann](#): > > Presumably he has been eating Tide pods if he thinks that’s what candy looks like. > [@ekedolphin](#): > > OH SHIT we need to get him to the hospital! These sort of answers are why Tide has been getting away with this crap. I am glad [kenobi\_65] has set the record and facts straight ---
**Author:** ![Atamasama](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atamasama/32/12961_2.png) [@Atamasama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atamasama)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2022, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/94 "2022-06-20T02:01:47Z")
> [@DrDeth](#): > > I am glad [kenobi\_65] has set the record and facts straight Um, no. Quite the opposite. You presumed that it “looked like candy” and so kids will eat it. Kenobi quite accurately pointed out that kids will stick just about **anything** in their mouths at a certain age. It doesn’t really matter what it looks like; it’s small enough to fit in their mouths and has a unique smell and squishy texture that might intrigue children. Insisting it “looks like candy” is ridiculous though. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2022, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/95 "2022-06-20T03:29:11Z")
As my article pointed, it looks like Gushers, a kids candy. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2022, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/96 "2022-06-20T03:39:50Z")
Also companies deliberately make candy look bright and colorful to attract people to eat the product. So to argue that color doesn’t matter doesn’t make a lot of sense. Just because some kids might still put it in their mouth doesn’t mean they shouldn’t try to make them unattractive. There definitely are colors that look gross. Plus there are tactics used elsewhere, like bitterants to discourage consumption. Has Tide put any such intensely bitter substance on the outside of their Tide pods? ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2022, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/97 "2022-06-20T03:44:24Z")
Got a link? Stories like these strike me as urban legendy. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2022, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/98 "2022-06-20T03:49:55Z")
In the late 1990s, Dave Barry went to another country where his wife was doing some reporting, and he and some colleagues were served a large white gelatinous…THING…that the waitress wouldn’t tell them what it was until they had all tasted it. It was milt, or fish sperm, which led to numerous jokes that all seemed to have a punch line that rhymed with “Fresident Flinton.” I miss his weekly columns. I’ve also seen “the jellied shit that surrounds Spam” compared to alien sperm. Also, I don’t have a link, but I have heard that more Tide Pods have been unintentionally eaten by elderly people with dementia, who have quite likely largely lost their senses of taste and smell, than by children of any age. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2022, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/99 "2022-06-20T14:44:49Z")
Moderating: > [@Asuka](#): > > Well at least this wasnt that incident a few years ago where a high school student before school ejaculated in the ranch dressing tub that was to be used for the school lunches salads, and it was only caught after multiple students complained the ranch tastes funny. [https://boards.straightdope.com/t/warning-for-asuka-unnecessary-sexualization-and-failure-to-follow-moderator-instructions/966028?u=puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/warning-for-asuka-unnecessary-sexualization-and-failure-to-follow-moderator-instructions/966028) This is an official warning for failure to follow moderator instructions. And it was close to a suspension. ---
**Author:** ![Bear\_Nenno](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bear_nenno/32/3358_2.png) [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)\ **Post date:** [July 7, 2022, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304/100 "2022-07-07T18:42:13Z")
> [@Ike\_Witt](#): > > What doesn’t make sense is the the nozzle on the chemical bag could fit the spigot of the milk dispenser. In my case the nozzles actually weren’t compatible. I was convinced that it was because I couldn’t figure out how to install it, not that the bag was wrong. So, I managed to force the thing in there and somehow crammed the spigot end into the bag end and got it to work. I had a line forming behind me, so I felt rushed and just wanted to get the thing in there. It’s possible the person in the story just somehow made the thing work. He/she may not have been the regular milk person. 🤷‍♂️ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elementary-school-serves-floor-sealant-to-students-instead-of-milk/966304.md?page=4)