# Elevator Crap (literally) **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 30, 2002, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588 "2002-10-30T19:41:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 4:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/21 "2002-10-31T04:16:23Z")
I can’t get over how many people need to have their shit jumped. WTF? ---
**Author:** ![Siegfried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Siegfried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siegfried)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/22 "2002-10-31T04:27:02Z")
I never encountered this when I worked in the dorms, but my friend did during one of his on-calls. I had never and have never since heard him use so many profanities in such creative arrangements. While I escaped the “feces-elevator surprise,” which we were all warned about during training, I did wake up one morning to find someone had defecated in the hallway on my floor. I big pile of excrement **right in front of the bathroom door**! This person was ten feet away from the nearest toilet stall and just let it loose on the floor! ---
**Author:** ![Jurhael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@Jurhael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurhael)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/23 "2002-10-31T05:00:51Z")
Maybe they reallly had to go… But, that’s NASTY! I’d to ever encounter a big pile of shit… ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/24 "2002-10-31T05:02:55Z")
I don’t get this. My shit goes straight from one pipe into another with the audacity of an ATM transaction in Greenland. You’d have to have a fucking strobe light to catch it inbetween. What’s with these assnine excreteabitionists? ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/25 "2002-10-31T05:04:38Z")
Heh heh Jurhael, how ya doin you shit kicker you? ---
**Author:** ![Neil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/839c29/32.png) [@Neil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neil)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/26 "2002-10-31T05:27:34Z")
In my dorm last year, some drunk (I assume, it was a big party weekend) guy shit on the bathroom floor- toilets about 15 feet away. Furthermore, it was in a way that opening the door too wide smeared it a bit, so we mostly just used the bathroom down the hall for the rest of the weekend. Whole floor got charged, of course, since they never found out who it was. ---
**Author:** ![Jurhael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/cab0a1/32.png) [@Jurhael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jurhael)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/27 "2002-10-31T05:30:42Z")
“I’d to ever encounter a big pile of shit…” My, that was an oopsie! I meant that I’d never want to encounter a big pile of shit. Course I wouldn’t want to encounter a small pile of shit either! And, I’m doing fine, Lieu! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![LittleTigger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/58956e/32.png) [@LittleTigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LittleTigger)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/28 "2002-10-31T07:40:08Z")
We are all talking about poop here, hehehehehe. I would have made the elevatorpooper wear a diaper. ---
**Author:** ![Eleusis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Eleusis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eleusis)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/29 "2002-10-31T08:09:50Z")
Geeze, big deal. So the guy took a shit in the elevator. Get over it! This PC crap is getting out of hand. I’m kidding! Sounds like a good excuse to install some security cameras. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/30 "2002-10-31T09:05:26Z")
One of my friends used to work in a women’s clothing store in the mall (right next door to the restrooms) and she came home weekly with stories of finding shit, used tampons, you name it, in the dressing rooms. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/31 "2002-10-31T11:40:44Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Revtim \* > \*\*Would that actually be an inertial shit? I think he would have to be traveling in a curved path for a centrifugal shit. \*\* That’s right, Newton’s first law is all about movements. ---
**Author:** ![Alexxandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/278dde/32.png) [@Alexxandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alexxandra)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/32 "2002-10-31T16:12:15Z")
Once, at a public swimming pool, a friend and I were in the jacuzzi with several others. My friend got up to get out, and said,“OMG I just stepped in something.” She hopped out of the tub, to discover her foot was covered with shit. They turned off the tub(so we could see the bottom), and there it was, a HUGE human shit with a footprint neatly squashing it right in the middle. Blurgh. My friend and I immediately went for very long and very hot showers, and went home. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/33 "2002-10-31T17:05:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by «Ðëëp¤F®ïêd»™ \* > \*\*YOU SICK DISGUSTING PUTRID PEICE OF HUMAN GARBAGE! \*\* You sure the turd was of human origin? I’m thinking someone’s guide dog may have been resposible. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/34 "2002-10-31T17:55:35Z")
Well, it certainly wasn’t a Golden Retriever. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/35 "2002-10-31T18:07:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eleusis \* > \*\*Geeze, big deal. So the guy took a shit in the elevator. Get over it! This PC crap is getting out of hand. > \*\* huh huh… PC crap, indeed! you slay you! ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/36 "2002-10-31T18:08:22Z")
LOLOLOL!! **lieu** , thanks. That was sorely needed, as I was about to loose my lunch reading this. ---
**Author:** ![\_Deep\_F\_ied](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/7cd45c/32.png) [@\_Deep\_F\_ied](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_Deep_F_ied)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/37 "2002-10-31T18:24:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Jeff Olsen \* > \*\*You sure the turd was of human origin? I’m thinking someone’s guide dog may have been resposible. \*\* Seeing as how I lack a degree in Crapology I am not qualified to make distictions between animal and human feces **Jeff**. However, it is possible… maybe next time I will check for cornhusks and peanuts to make a distiction…_jeez_ . ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/38 "2002-10-31T18:32:49Z")
[SNL’s “[Jarret’s Room](http://snltranscripts.jt.org/01/01bjarrett.phtml)”] And by the way, Sigma Chi, just because you kicked me out DOESN’T mean I’m gonna STOP taking DUMPS in your WASHING MACHINE. [/SNL’s “Jarret’s Room”] ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/39 "2002-10-31T18:38:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by «Ðëëp¤F®ïêd»™ \* > \*\*Seeing as how I lack a degree in Crapology I am not qualified to make distictions between animal and human feces **Jeff**. > However, it is possible… maybe next time I will check for cornhusks and peanuts to make a distiction…_jeez_ . \*\* I feel I should clarify. The rant is fine but might be a bit misdirected. ---
**Author:** ![\_Deep\_F\_ied](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/7cd45c/32.png) [@\_Deep\_F\_ied](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_Deep_F_ied)\ **Post date:** [October 31, 2002, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elevator-crap-literally/134588/40 "2002-10-31T18:38:33Z")
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