# Elton John **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 5, 2003, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062 "2003-02-05T22:47:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a6a055/32.png) [@lout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lout)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/1 "2003-02-05T22:47:14Z")
I wish this pasty-faced, untalented, moronic nauseating bag of shit would crawl off somewhere and DIE!!! Everytime I see a photo of his smug, bloated, gap-toothed ugly mess of a face, I feel like hurting someone. I hate his music, I"ve always hated it. “Benny and the Jets” is supposed to be one of his best songs, right? Well, it SUCKS! I fail to see the “charm” in his thing about glasses, his sucking up to British royalty is just sickening, his “knightood”, his touchy-feely with diseased slime like Michael Jackson and Liz Taylor – all of that is fucking revolting. He’s been around forever it seems, yet he’s still there, accepting various awards, appearing at “events,” etc., etc. WHY??? What in hell does this asshole have to offer? I don’t get it! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/2 "2003-02-05T23:14:48Z")
Untalented? I beg to differ. I think John is one of the most talented men in popular music and has been for the past 30 years or so. That is not to say that I would care to listen to “Crocodile Rock” or “Saturday Night is All Right for Figting” again, but I think he has a substantial body of work with some very noteworthy songs, especially “Your Song,” “Tiny Dancer,” “Levon,” “Somebody Saved My Life Tonight,” and “Candle in the Wind” (the original tribute to Norma Jean. The man obviously has been influenced by classical music so I doubt that makes him moronic. Of course you have a right to your opinions, regardless of what I think of them. > [@](#): > > Everytime I see a photo of his smug, bloated, gap-toothed ugly mess of a face, I feel like hurting someone. You’re not obsessed, are you? > [@](#): > > I fail to see the “charm” in his thing about glasses, We all have our idiosyncracies. I used to wear hats all the time in my younger days. > [@](#): > > his sucking up to British royalty is just sickening, From what I’ve read in the press, his friendship with Princess Di was quite genuine. I am not aware that he has sucked up to any other royals. > [@](#): > > his “knightood”, He deserves his as much as Mick Jagger and Cliff Richards deserve theirs. > [@](#): > > his touchy-feely with diseased slime like Michael Jackson and Liz Taylor – all of that is fucking revolting. I find that I cannot defend Jacko, but what has Liz Taylor done to deserve the title of diseased slime? I mean, she goes through husbands like I go through a 12-pack, but other than that she has seemed like a normal human being. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/3 "2003-02-05T23:16:30Z")
> [@](#): > > What in hell does this asshole have to offer? \*Empty Sky Val-hala Western Ford Gateway Hymn 2000 Lady What’s Tomorrow Sails The Scaffold Skyline Pigeon Gulliver Hay-Chewed Your Song I Need You To Turn To Take Me To The Pilot No Shoestrings On Louise First Episode At Hienton Sixty Years On Border Song The Greatest Discovery The Cage The King Must Die Ballad Of A Well-Known Gun Come Down In Time Country Comfort Son Of Your Father My Father’s Gun Where To Now St. Peter? Love Song Amoreena Talking Old Soldiers Burn Down The Mission Take Me To The Pilot Honky Tonk Women Sixty Years On Can I Put You On Bad Side Of The Moon Friends Honey Roll Variations On Friends Theme (The First Kiss) Seasons Variations On Michelle’s Song (A Day In The Country) Can I Put You On Michelle’s Song I Meant To Do My Work Today (A Day In The Country) Four Moods Seasons Reprise Tiny Dancer Levon Razor Face Madman Across The Water Indian Sunset Holiday Inn Rotten Peaches All The Nasties Goodbye Honky Cat Mellow I Think I’m Going To Kill Myself Suzie (Dramas) Rocket Man (I Think It’s Going To Be A Long Long Time) Salvation Slave Amy Mona Lisas And Mad Hatters Hercules Daniel Teacher I Need You Elderberry Wine Blues For Baby And Me Midnight Creeper Have Mercy On The Criminal I’m Going To Be A Teenage Idol Texan Love Song Crocodile Rock High Flying Bird Funeral For A Friend/Love Lies Bleeding Candle In The Wind Bennie And The Jets Goodbye Yellow Brick Road This Song Has No Title Grey Seal Jamaica Jerk Off I’ve Seen That Movie Too Sweet Painted Lady The Ballad Of Danny Bailey (1909-34) Dirty Little Girl All The Girls Love Alice Your Sister Can’t Twist (But She Can Rock ‘n’ Roll) Saturday Night’s Alright (For Fighting) Roy Rogers Social Disease Harmony The Bitch Is Back Pinky Grimsby Dixie Lily Solar Prestige A Gammon You’re So Static I’ve Seen The Saucers Stinker Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me Ticking Captain Fantastic And The Brown Dirt Cowboy Tower Of Babel Bitter Fingers Tell Me When The Whistle Blows Someone Saved My Life Tonight (Gotta Get A) Meal Ticket Better Off Dead Writing We All Fall In Love Sometimes/Curtains Medley (Yell Help, Wednesday Night, Ugly) Dan Dare (Pilot Of The Future) Island Girl Grow Some Funk Of Your Own I Feel Like A Bullet (In The Gun Of Robert Ford) Street Kids Hard Luck Story Feed Me Billy Bones And The White Bird Your Starter For… Tonight One Horse Town Chameleon Boogie Pilgrim Cage The Songbird Crazy Water Shoulder Holster Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word Out Of The Blue Between Seventeen And Twenty The Wide-Eyed And Laughing Someone’s Final Song Where’s The Shoorah? If There’s A God In Heaven (What’s He Waiting For?) Idol Theme From A Non-Existent TV Series Bite Your Lip (Get Up And Dance) Shine On Through Return To Paradise I Don’t Care Big Dipper It Ain’t Gonna Be Easy Part Time Love Georgia Shooting Star Madness Reverie Song For Guy Johnny B. Goode Warm Love In A Cold World Born Bad Thunder In The Night Spotlight Street Boogie Victim Of Love Chasing The Crown Little Jeannie Sartorial Eloquence Two Rooms At The End Of The World White Lady White Powder Dear God Never Gonna Fall In Love Again Take Me Back Give Me The Love Breaking Down Barriers Heart In The Right Place Just Like Belgium Nobody Wins Fascist Faces Carla/Etude Fanfare Chloe Heels Of The Wind Elton’s Song The Fox Dear John Spiteful Child Ball And Chain Legal Boys I Am Your Robot Blue Eyes Empty Garden (Hey Hey Johnny) Princess Where Have All The Good Times Gone All Quiet On The Western Front Cold As Christmas (In The Middle Of The Year) I’m Still Standing Too Low For Zero Religion I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues Crystal Kiss The Bride Whipping Boy Saint One More Arrow Restless Slow Down Georgie (She’s Poison) Who Wears These Shoes Breaking Hearts (Ain’t What It Used To Be) Li’l ‘Frigerator Passengers In Neon Burning Buildings Did He Shoot Her Sad Songs (Say So Much) This Town Cry To Heaven Soul Glove Nikita Too Young Wrap Her Up Satellite Tell Me What The Papers Say Candy By The Pound Shoot Down The Moon Leather Jackets Hoop Of Fire Don’t Trust That Woman Go It Alone Gypsy Heart Slow Rivers Heartache All Over The World Angeline Memory Of Love Paris I Fall Apart Town Of Plenty A Word In Spanish Mona Lisas And Mad Hatters Part Two I Don’t Wanna Go On With You Like That Japanese Hands Goodbye Marlon Brando The Camera Never Lies Heavy Traffic Poor Cow Since God Invented Girls Durban Deep Healing Hands Whispers Club At The End Of The Street Sleeping With The Past Stones Throw From Hurtin’ Sacrifice I Never Knew Her Name Amazes Me Blue Avenue Simple Life The One Sweat It Out Runaway Train [with Eric Clapton] Whitewash County The North When A Woman Doesn’t Want You Emily On Dark Street Understanding Women The Last Song Tear Drops [with K.D. Lang] When I Think About Love (I Think About You) [with P.M. Dawn] The Power [with Little Richard] Shakey Ground [with Don Henley] True Love [with Kiki Dee] If You Were Me [with Chris Rea] A Woman’s Needs [with Tammy Wynette] Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me [live with George Michael] Old Friend [with Nik Kershaw] Go On And On [with Gladys Knight] Don’t Go Breaking My Heart [with RuPaul] Ain’t Nothing Like The Real Thing [with Marcella Detriot] I’m Your Puppet [with Paul Young] Love Letters [with Bonnie Raitt] Born To Lose [with Leonard Cohen] Duets For One My Baby Loves Lovin’ Cottonfields Lady D’Arbanville Natural Sinner United We Stand Spirit In The Sky Travellin’ Band I Can’t Tell The Bottom From The Top Good Morning Freedom Young Gifted And Black In The Summertime Up Around The Bend Snake In The Grass Neanderthal Man She Sold Me Magic Come And Get It Love Of The Common People Signed Sealed Delivered It’s All In The Game Yellow River Circle Of Life I Just Can’t Wait To Be King Can You Feel The Love Tonight Believe Made In England House Cold Pain Belfast Latitude Please Man Lies Blessed Long Way from Happiness Live Like Horses The End Will Come If The River Can Bend Love’s Got A Lot To Answer For Something About The Way You Look Tonight The Big Picture Recover Your Soul January I Can’t Steer My Heart Clear Of You Wicked Dreams Blue Eyes \* ---
**Author:** ![Reeder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Reeder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeder)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/4 "2003-02-05T23:22:52Z")
Damn Lib. I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m impressed. As for the OP… Bugger off. ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/5 "2003-02-05T23:25:19Z")
Well, I know who I _won’t_ be sitting next to at the MGM Grand on March 28th! Hee hee! ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/6 "2003-02-05T23:28:06Z")
Lack of imagination, absence of creativity, no humour … so much material to work with yet a decidedly crap rant…… A wasted opportunity. Sorry. Standards people, standards ! ---
**Author:** ![lout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a6a055/32.png) [@lout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lout)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/7 "2003-02-05T23:29:10Z")
I’m sure I’m not alone in hating Elton John. We’ll see. Elton’s great if you like stupid sentimental little ditties that were written in a hot tub in about 10 minutes by the hack Bernie Taupin while snorting cocaine. ---
**Author:** ![neutron\_star](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/51bf81/32.png) [@neutron\_star](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neutron_star)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/8 "2003-02-05T23:39:03Z")
I think a lot of Elton’s 70s stuff was fantastic, but his more recent works are sugary crap, custom-designed to make people flock in droves to stupid Disney movies. I can’t feel any real emotion or musical genius behind them like I could with songs like “Tiny Dancer,” “Daniel,” and “Funeral for a Friend/Love Lies Bleeding.” ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/9 "2003-02-05T23:52:34Z")
You’re not alone; here’s a couple of other Elton John Hate Threads - [this one](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=110433) and [this one](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=107295) - but the second one is better, IMO :D. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [February 5, 2003, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/10 "2003-02-05T23:58:21Z")
I’d just like to point out that I was listening to Benny and the Jets on the radio when I came into the pit and saw this thread. Other than that, I have absolutely nothing constructive to contribute to this thread. You still may, if you so desire, quote my entire post and then say something like “daaaaaaamn! remind me never to cross paths with Ender in the pit.” ---
**Author:** ![lout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a6a055/32.png) [@lout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lout)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/11 "2003-02-06T00:48:55Z")
Elton John is nothing more or less than the British version of Liberace. Of course, America never “knighted” Liberace. ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/12 "2003-02-06T01:03:05Z")
**untalented**??? Are you serious? Get a grip dude! ---
**Author:** ![Kal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9de053/32.png) [@Kal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kal)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/13 "2003-02-06T01:09:21Z")
Just out of interest, what’s with the “knighted” thing? Why are you putting it in quotation marks? ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/14 "2003-02-06T01:09:24Z")
Nah, I can’t say I agree. I’m not a fan of his later work, but his earlier stuff is awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/15 "2003-02-06T01:27:29Z")
I think Elton is a jerk, at least from what I’ve heard, he’s rude and snotty, but I do like his work. I LIKE “Benny and the Jets”. And “Tiny Dancer,” “I Guess That’s Why They Call It the Blues”, “Your Song” and the original “Candle in the Wind.” (The song sounds so much more appropriate for Marilyn than it does for Diana.) Although I do have some advice-Elton, lose the rug. It looks terrible. You look better without it. Seriously. ---
**Author:** ![irishgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/8edcca/32.png) [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/16 "2003-02-06T01:44:57Z")
c’mon people he writes nice songs and sings them quite well, but oy, vey! have you seen how he dresses!! there is nothing worse, style wise, than elton and david in matching printed suits. just because they’re by versace, doesn’t make them any less bleurgh. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/17 "2003-02-06T02:05:51Z")
I just don’t get how people get this worked up over celebrities. Who gives a shit? Don’t watch their movies, read their books, or listen to their music. Problem solved! Unless you talking about Julia Roberts. Julia Roberts is Satan. ---
**Author:** ![Kwyjibo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/59ef9b/32.png) [@Kwyjibo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kwyjibo)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/18 "2003-02-06T02:08:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Miller \* > \*\*I just don’t get how people get this worked up over celebrities. Who gives a shit? Don’t watch their movies, read their books, or listen to their music. Problem solved! > > Unless you talking about Julia Roberts. Julia Roberts is Satan. \*\* [hijack] She’s Satan? Good thing she was banned then!. 😛 [/hi-jack] ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/19 "2003-02-06T02:10:55Z")
lout: What’s your obsession with putting the word _knighted_ in quotation marks? Whether you like it or not, the government of the country of which he holds citizenship deigned to appoint him to that particular office. Get over yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d26b3c/32.png) [@Mr.Blue\_Sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Blue_Sky)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062/20 "2003-02-06T02:24:37Z")
[nitpick] It’s “Bennie” not “Benny” [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/elton-john/153062.md?page=2)