# Embarrassing confessions

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [March 21, 2007, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908 "2007-03-21T19:29:58Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1

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### Author: ![cowgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@cowgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cowgirl)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/1 "2007-03-21T19:29:58Z")

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Given that:

- I hate talk shows
- I really hate self-improvement pap that’s been overproduced for mass consumption
- I really, really hate pompous, sanctimonious jerkwads
- I really, really, REALLY hate Dr Phil

It is strange and more than a little embarrassing for me to admit that I am hopelessly addicted to the Dr Phil show.

(I can’t bear Montel Williams, tho. This makes me feel that all is not lost: my sanctimonious jerkwad-meter is still functional in that regard.)

Help me feel better. Tell me about the secret obsessions (or other embarrassing things) that you don’t want your IRL friends to know about.

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### Author: ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/2 "2007-03-21T19:38:08Z")

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I am:

An extremely lazy underachiever  
Self hateful  
Working out of my home office, but should be on the road every day  
Obsessed with my weight and food in general  
In love with my parakeet  
Afraid to have children in the fear that they I will pass on my anxiety disorder and depression

I watch:

The Dr. Phil Show  
Three’s Company  
The Girls Next Door  
Intervention

I used to watch (and still would if I could!)

Jerry Springer  
Howard Stern on E!  
The Tom Green Show

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### Author: ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/3 "2007-03-21T20:54:25Z")

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I am a scientist. Supposedly, a brilliant critical thinker. Everyone comes to me for solutions because I can weed through all the crap and get down to what’s important. That being said…

When I’m on pain meds, I’ll buy anything. Stuff that you know is \*crap \* suddenly seems brilliant. My injuries are the sole reason there are infomercials. I’ve been accused of having Ron Popeil on speed dial.

Also, I watch the stupid crap the History Channel shows when they think no one is watching. You know, Hitler’s Missing Love Child, Secrets of the Illuminati, Bermuda Triangle = Black Hole, Lost Worlds, whatever. I know it’s illogical and a waste of my time, but I watch it anyway.

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### Author: ![yellowval](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/919ad9/32.png) [@yellowval](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowval)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/4 "2007-03-21T20:57:25Z")

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I watch Days of Our Lives and The Bold and the Beautiful on my lunch break.

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### Author: ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/5 "2007-03-21T20:57:25Z")

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I like cheap white bread better than “the good stuff”.  
I prefer Kraft macaroni ‘n’ cheese to “the good stuff”  
I don’t change my sheets often enough.

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### Author: ![Lightnin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lightnin/32/180_2.png) [@Lightnin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lightnin)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/6 "2007-03-21T21:09:41Z")

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I actually liked the movie _Xanadu_.

Heck, I like a lot of “chick flicks”. I guess I’m just a romantic at heart.

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### Author: ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/7 "2007-03-21T21:17:18Z")

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I know way more than I should about celebrities. I don’t go out of my way to watch entertainment shows or read magazines about them, but somehow I know every little current detail of who is marrying/divorcing whom, who is having a baby with whom, etc. I don’t know these people; I will never meet these people; why should I care in the slightest who is doing what with whom?

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### Author: ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/8 "2007-03-21T21:20:17Z")

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I’m a guy and I love James Blunt’s music.

I love Deal or No Deal, and I yell at the tv.

Me: “DEAL! DEAL! DEAL! NOOOOOOOO!”  
Howie Mandel: “I’m sorry but all you get to walk away with is $5.”  
Me: “hahaha thats what you get you stupid whore.”

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### Author: ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/9 "2007-03-21T21:31:38Z")

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I own a copy of the Backstreet Boys’ “Millenium” CD _and_ both Spice Girls’ CDs.  
I love collecting Archie comics.  
I can’t get to sleep in the dark.

_hides face in shame_

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### Author: ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/10 "2007-03-21T21:33:22Z")

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I’m sure I’m not as smart as people tell me I am. I’m convinced I’ll be outed as a moron in smart clothing one of these days.

ETA: **Kyth** … I went to Backstreet Boys _concerts_. Once, when they did 4 shows in Montreal within a week, I had tickets to _two_ of them.

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### Author: ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/11 "2007-03-21T21:37:02Z")

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- I like playing with my nether regions that rhyme with bowlin’

- I once kicked my friend in the nuts with a wooden shoe and laughed about it

- I listen to J-Pop waaaay too much. かわいいだから！ because it’s cute

- I will insist that I’m fat even though I know I’m actually not. This drives people bonkers.

- I r burning your dog 😃

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### Author: ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/12 "2007-03-21T21:40:13Z")

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[QUOTE=Tahssa]  
I love Deal or No Deal, and I yell at the tv.

Me: “DEAL! DEAL! DEAL! NOOOOOOOO!”  
Howie Mandel: “I’m sorry but all you get to walk away with is $5.”  
Me: “hahaha thats what you get you stupid whore.”  
[/QUOTE]  
That made me laugh really really hard, because that’s pretty much me while watching “America’s Next Top Model.”

“Cry! Cry, bitch! Tyra wants tears and redemption!”

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### Author: ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/13 "2007-03-21T21:43:49Z")

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[QUOTE=Autolycus]

- I like playing with my nether regions that rhyme with bowlin’  
\<snip\>  
[/quote]  
Fowlin’? Towlin’? Gowlin’? Showlin’? Powlin’? Gorgonzolin’?

> [@](#):
>
> - I r burning your dog 😃

Hey, leave the poor pooches out of this!

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### Author: ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/14 "2007-03-21T21:43:52Z")

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- I own the “Greatest Hits of Petula Clark” AND “the Greatest Hits of Mama Cass.”

- I eat at McDonald’s about once a month.

- I think feet are sexy.

- I’m 37 (38 in less than two months) and I have a MySpace profile.

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### Author: ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/15 "2007-03-21T21:46:50Z")

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I despise romance novels, but will read a Nora Roberts every six months or so. Please don’t tell my family!

**Featherlou** - I’m glad I’m not the only one who didn’t get the reference.

StG

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### Author: ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/16 "2007-03-21T21:53:16Z")

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I took it to mean

bowlin = colon

which is ewww. Be normal like the rest of us and just play with your willy.

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### Author: ![Autolycus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@Autolycus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Autolycus)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/17 "2007-03-21T21:59:16Z")

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[QUOTE=Tahssa]  
I took it to mean

bowlin = colon

which is ewww. Be normal like the rest of us and just play with your willy.  
[/QUOTE]

There is no normal on The Dope 😉

And dont worry about my willy, he gets plenty of love too.

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### Author: ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/18 "2007-03-21T23:10:24Z")

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[QUOTE=Autolycus]  
There is no normal on The Dope 😉

And dont worry about my willy, he gets plenty of love too.  
[/QUOTE]

Just wash your hands between sessions.

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### Author: ![pinkfreud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pinkfreud/32/17603_2.png) [@pinkfreud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pinkfreud)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/19 "2007-03-21T23:24:12Z")

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I’ve been watching “America’s Next Top Model” since its first season. I feel kinda guilty, but I keep on watching.

Now I’m hooked on an ANTM ripoff in which the next [Pussycat Doll](http://www.cwtv.com/shows/pussycat-dolls) is sought.

Help! I’m addicted to schlocky bimbo reality shows!

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### Author: ![pbbth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f9ae1b/32.png) [@pbbth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pbbth)
#### Post date: [March 21, 2007, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/20 "2007-03-21T23:30:11Z")

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I am the person who buys the $1 documentaries. You know, the ones at the 99 cent store, Wal-Mart, etc. If I see an educational movie of any sort and it is something I can afford I have to take it home with me, like I think it is a puppy at the pound. Since a dollar is something I can afford to spend I own all of the documentaries I find at the dollar store. I found one that is a part of a series (the CNN Milennium series to be exact) at the 99 cent store and I want the rest of them but I can’t find them anywhere. I looked up the series but it is $100 for the set on VHS and that is too expensive for me. ☹

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