# Embarrassing confessions **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 21, 2007, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908 "2007-03-21T19:29:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2007, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/21 "2007-03-21T23:40:22Z")
Since this have devolved into a “what I watch on TV” thread (with the exception of **Autolycus** – thanks . . . . I think): I was fascinated with that horrid trainwreck called “Growin’ Up Gotti.” Wouldn’t miss it. With no words to describe Victoria Gotti (and her cheap as hell white get-ups), I’ll get to the boys. They were (are) 3 of the most insipid, clueless and vapid males on earth, yet “smart” enough to get anything, get out of anything and get away with anything when it came to Victoria that I’ve ever seen. Why was this so gooooooooood??!! ---
**Author:** ![whole\_bean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/96bed5/32.png) [@whole\_bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whole_bean)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2007, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/22 "2007-03-21T23:45:22Z")
[QUOTE=Antigen] I’m sure I’m not as smart as people tell me I am. I’m convinced I’ll be outed as a moron in smart clothing one of these days . . . [/QUOTE] sooner than you think [QUOTE=Antigen] I went to Backstreet Boys _concerts_. Once, when they did 4 shows in Montreal within a week, I had tickets to _two_ of them. [/QUOTE] 😛 ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2007, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/23 "2007-03-21T23:59:02Z")
[QUOTE=Autolycus] - I like playing with my nether regions that rhyme with bowlin’ [/QUOTE] Well, you’re a boy. There’s magic buttons in there. 😃 Anyway, on to my embarrassing confessions. -I inspect/examine everything, including the toilet paper I’ve just used. I don’t pick at it or anything, but I do look at it for a second or two before it goes in the bowl to be flushed. -I peed my pants last year while sober. I waited too long with a full bladder and couldn’t hold it until I got to the bathroom in my apartment. Thank goodness for black pants and no nearby neighbors to see my embarrassment. -I watch the worst of the “train wreck” reality television to make myself feel normal and somehow functionally superior to these people. Nanny shows, wife swap shows, and that stupid I Love New York are on the top of these lists; I can’t turn away because it’s all so surreal. -I can’t get out of bed most mornings until I absolutely have to because my bed is a comfy nest of pillows, feather blanket and saggy mattress. I feel so slovenly, but I can’t be bothered to stay awake when the alarm first wakes me up. ---
**Author:** ![Antigen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/848f3c/32.png) [@Antigen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antigen)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/24 "2007-03-22T00:03:42Z")
[QUOTE=whole bean] 😛 [/QUOTE] I was young(er) and stupid(er) then! ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/25 "2007-03-22T00:06:56Z")
A few years ago I started a relationship with someone I found on Yahoo personals. I told her I was recently divorced (even though I wasn’t) and I wanted to enter into my next relationship slowly. We would meet for lunch or dinner once a week then go to a movie or some other things folks do on dates. Other than a couple of heavy petting sessions was never anything physical between us. My wife was clueless, she said I was entitled to my Saturday’s with my buddies playing poker or fishing. After 4 months I realized that the relationship could never go anywhere and just disappeared from her life. I really feel bad for what I did to both my wife and her. She was an extremely nice and decent person and I took advantage of her. Since then I have avoided going to the city that she lives for fear of running into her. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/26 "2007-03-22T00:14:57Z")
I know stations where I can watch reruns of _Mama’s Family and Golden Girls_ even though I have seen **every single stinkin’ episode** of both shows several times over. Oh, and I still think _The Nanny_ is funny. Sappy movies involving children and/or animals will make me tear up. If I just happen to be in the room when _Oprah_ is on, I’ll watch. Oh, and I also try to time my day so I can watch _Sabrina The Teenage Witch_ reruns. I’m hopeless. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/27 "2007-03-22T01:00:32Z")
I make squiggy-oogy cat noises when I talk to the cats. At night, I pee sitting down. (Cuz it’s dark, I don’t want to turn on a light, and it’s polite to keep the floor dry, right) I LIKE the Cowsills. ---
**Author:** ![Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambi_Hassenpfeffer)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/28 "2007-03-22T02:42:16Z")
[QUOTE=Kythereia] I own a copy of the Backstreet Boys’ “Millenium” CD _and_ both Spice Girls’ CDs. [/QUOTE] _Colours of the world Spice up your life Every boy and every girl Spice up your life People of the world Spice up your life_ Thanks to you, that’ll be in my head for days. My confessions: I adore Supernanny because it enables me to feel smugly superior to the people on it. I also love[d] [Starting Over](http://www.fearlessliving.org/about_us/starting_over) and I pepper my conversations with Iyanlaïsms like “Be a good day!” just to annoy people. I watch judge shows if I’m home. I watch Oprah and The View every single day. I can quote entire episodes of the Golden Girls. I suppose my confessions are all pop culture related, but there you go. ---
**Author:** ![Mirror\_Image\_egamI\_rorriM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e56c9b/32.png) [@Mirror\_Image\_egamI\_rorriM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mirror_Image_egamI_rorriM)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 3:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/29 "2007-03-22T03:09:19Z")
I’m 20 and I still sleep with a stuffed animal (a lobster named Bobster). I took him to college, too. I can’t ride a bike. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/30 "2007-03-22T04:46:42Z")
[QUOTE=Antigen] I’m sure I’m not as smart as people tell me I am. I’m convinced I’ll be outed as a moron in smart clothing one of these days. [/QUOTE] Shhhh, here’s the trick. I have my face burried in a computer all day at work, so if someone starts asking me a question, I pull up google, and start typing in keywords, I then pretend to think about it for a second, and reply with the correct answer and they’re none the wiser. Today, my answer was “Herbert” Of course I know the name of the old pedophile from Family Guy. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/31 "2007-03-22T05:40:05Z")
**racer** , I think you’re winning the thread so far. Oh, the answer was “colon.” I think it’s probably more your rectum you’re actually playing with, **Autolycus**. (“Rectum? Damn near killed 'im.”) ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/32 "2007-03-22T06:01:00Z")
When I was in high school, I would excitedly come home to watch Pink Lady and/or Rene Simard. :: head in hands :: I suppose I could say I was trying to be multicultural or something… Despite all my years of CFNY-style alternative-music snobbery and obscure-electronica-inspired disdain of celebrity pop-music (the first piece of recorded music I ever bought for myself was Osamu Kitajima, for example), Madonna’s _Ray of Light_ is one of my favourite albums. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/33 "2007-03-22T07:51:37Z")
- I like reading women’s magazines. (I’m a man. I like to know how they think though, ya know?) For that matter, I also like TV programming that is supposedly aimed at women. It’s just such a secret world to me, and it feels a little scandalous for me to be watching it. - I love Mariah Carey and will sing her songs at full volume when no one is around (and at least whistle them when people _are_ around). - I sometimes eat peanut butter straight out of the jar. - I shave my balls. OK, I’m not so embarrassed about this one, I just wanted to say it. It actually feels damn good having smooth balls. - Once I dropped a hot dog on the filthy ground at the state fair and ate it anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hilarity_n.suze/32/6223_2.png) [@Hilarity\_N.Suze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hilarity_N.Suze)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 8:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/34 "2007-03-22T08:01:00Z")
I’ve never watched Oprah. I’m sure she is a great person, but her show just doesn’t look that interesting to me. I think she’s probably overrated, has way too much influence, didn’t think much of most of her literary picks, and I’m endlessly amused that she’s on the cover of her own magazine every month. (I visualize her standing in front of a mirror in the bedroom of her mansion, pumping her fist and gloating, “Hey! Yeah! I made the cover _again_!”) So when it’s time for me to grab a magazine and hop on the treadmill at the gym I am always very happy to see her latest is available and I get it and read it from cover (guess who?) to cover. ---
**Author:** ![tashabot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tashabot/32/6250_2.png) [@tashabot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tashabot)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/35 "2007-03-22T09:16:05Z")
Okay. I have a lot. I have songs from the following artists on my hard drive: Winger, Def Leppard, Spice Girls, Backstreet Boys, Eminem, Genesis, SOAP (long story), Shiny Toy Guns, Motley Crue, Guns and Roses, Nazareth, Twisted Sister, Bon Jovi, and pretty much every other bad 80’s hair band or horrid 90’s pop band out there. I also have the Milkshake song, a song by a gay white rapper about blowing splooge all over another guy’s face, the song “Copperhead Road” by Steve Earl (I also know the dance), and that song “Alive and Amplified” by the Mooney Suzuki. That’s the song in the Suzuki X-Terra commercial where the guy parachutes off his front yard. I spent three hours looking for the name of the song because I had to have it. I also own the musical Chicago soundtrack - both the movie version and the karaoke version. I also own the soundtracks for Final Fantasies six, seven, eight, nine and ten. Oh, and the Disney’s Aladdin soundtrack, but I think that’s justified because it rocks. I made a video of George W. Bush clips to the song “Let’s Get Retarded” by the Black Eyed Peas. I kept the MP3 because I like the song so much, and I consider the video, which is horrible, to be one of my greatest works. When I was little, I used to watch the Power Rangers. Too much. In fact, the other day I was talking about a voice actor who does a lot of animes I watch, and I said offhand “He was the black ranger.” And my friend goes “The black guy?” And I said “No, the white guy who took over after the black guy left.” And then my husband goes “I think you mean the green ranger, he got into voice acting.” And I said “NO IT WAS THE BLACK RANGER, GODDAMNIT.” And proceeded to list what all of the “other Rangers” have gone on to. Wikipedia is not always my friend. In that same vein, I sometimes randomly get the Alpha “Aye Aye Aye Aye Aye Aye” song stuck in my head. You know, the one from the movie. When I was in middle school I obsessively watched Jerry Springer. Why? I always wanted to see if someone I knew from back in Texas would be on it. I was fucked up. So there, **cowgirl**. Did I make you feel better? 🙂 ~Tasha ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 9:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/36 "2007-03-22T09:40:07Z")
[QUOTE=tashabot] I also have the Milkshake song [/QUOTE] I’ll one up you here. I have the Milkshake _video_ on my computer. My favorite moment is the obligatory “girl scowling at boyfriend ogling sexy dancers” shot found in virtually every sexy video (or even more popular, the “mother covering the eyes of young child” shot. See _Pussycat Dolls - Wait a Minute_ for reference) ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/37 "2007-03-22T13:24:02Z")
I dig the Jerry Springer show. If it were on when I’m awake and home, I’d watch it. It’s all choreographed, but it’s graaaaand. ---
**Author:** ![cowgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@cowgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cowgirl)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/38 "2007-03-22T13:29:03Z")
Y’all have made me feel so much better, not only about the Dr Phil but also about my other habits … Bon Jovi … peanut butter out of the jar … mmm Oh, and Dog the Bounty Hunter! I have a sick fascination with that show. Particularly with the wife. It’s not like I watch it every day (like _ahem_ some other shows) but if it’s on I can’t look away. I even get that sick feeling in my stomach like when gawking at a car accident. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_chao_goes_mu/32/3191_2.png) [@The\_Chao\_Goes\_Mu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Chao_Goes_Mu)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/39 "2007-03-22T14:01:22Z")
I cry at the end of Breakfast At Tiffany’s every time I watch it. (up to about 150 now) I still love E.T. In spite of being a lesbian, I have a bizarre crush on Gil Grissom on C.S.I. :dubious: I have conversations with my cats when no one is around. ---
**Author:** ![storyteller0910](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecae2f/32.png) [@storyteller0910](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/storyteller0910)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2007, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908/40 "2007-03-22T14:03:52Z")
[QUOTE=lisacurl] Just wash your hands between sessions. [/QUOTE] …and your cookware. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/embarrassing-confessions/396908.md?page=3)