# Empire: Total War **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [October 4, 2008, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460 "2008-10-04T17:36:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2008, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/21 "2008-10-06T19:53:29Z")
> [@smiling\_bandit](#): > > For the record, it’s almost exactly like Medeival: TW. There are fewer units, but because of this (and better balancing from it), the game does feel much more purist. It’s a real strategy matchup, and there’s less “grossly huge army crunching”. Religion actually plays a greater part of the game, too: The decision to go Christian or Buddhist changes things. I’m sick and tired of those motherfucking monks on the motherfucking battlefield! ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2008, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/22 "2008-10-06T21:06:56Z")
> [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](#): > > I’m sick and tired of those motherfucking monks on the motherfucking battlefield! You said it! They are nasty customers, but gunfire is their weakness. I like to play Shimazu and take Christianity at the first opportunity. I get mucho moolah and quick access to gunners, and can establish total dominance long before anyone can get to the Monks. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2008, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/23 "2008-10-07T14:25:52Z")
> [@smiling\_bandit](#): > > You said it! > > They are nasty customers, but gunfire is their weakness. I like to play Shimazu and take Christianity at the first opportunity. I get mucho moolah and quick access to gunners, and can establish total dominance long before anyone can get to the Monks. Amen. Gunpowder is key in that game. Don’t even let them get to monks if you can help it. ---
**Author:** ![smiling\_bandit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@smiling\_bandit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smiling_bandit)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2008, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/24 "2008-10-07T16:25:57Z")
Fortunately, by the time anyone gets to monks, you can either be getting to Heavy Cavalry or just spamming gunners by the thousands. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2008, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/25 "2008-10-07T16:35:55Z")
> [@smiling\_bandit](#): > > Fortunately, by the time anyone gets to monks, you can either be getting to Heavy Cavalry or just spamming gunners by the thousands. That heavy cavalry was pretty badass, too. I was also a big fan of those heavy shock troops, too. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2008, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/26 "2008-10-08T16:55:43Z")
Not to toot my own horn or anything, but I made the Hungarians my vassal when I was seiging their first settlement after they got excommunicated. Second one EVER! ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/27 "2008-10-10T17:48:09Z")
> [@smiling\_bandit](#): > > They are nasty customers, but gunfire is their weakness. I like to play Shimazu and take Christianity at the first opportunity. I get mucho moolah and quick access to gunners, and can establish total dominance long before anyone can get to the Monks. Every time I played that game, all the other families would be wiped out really earlyby revolts or events or bad luck or whatever, and so I’d always find myself as the only organized group on the map, having to take over unclaimed province after unclaimed province. ---
**Author:** ![Martini\_Enfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/martini_enfield/32/11123_2.png) [@Martini\_Enfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martini_Enfield)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/28 "2008-10-11T01:03:09Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > Every time I played that game, all the other families would be wiped out really earlyby revolts or events or bad luck or whatever, and so I’d always find myself as the only organized group on the map, having to take over unclaimed province after unclaimed province. That did seem to happen rather a lot, didn’t it? Still, it worked for me, since it meant that I wasn’t at risk of being back-stabbed by “allies” randomly deciding they wanted one of my provinces for no apparent reason… ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 1:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/29 "2008-10-11T01:37:23Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > They’re even more hopeless than phalanx formations in Rome. There’s a trick to it, but it’s almost cheating. They’re awesome when you’re on the defensive against an opponent without artillery and/or you attack an opponent who’ll bring the fight to you and doesn’t have artillery. In those cases… you just stick your pikemen in a straight line, diagonally across one of the corners of the map. Put them on “guard”, and stick archers behind them. Without enemy artillery fighting you, you can win against 10:1 odds, no problem. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/30 "2008-10-11T05:31:53Z")
I’m trying to upload the Stainless Steel Mod for Medieval 2: Total War. I’ve downloaded and installed everything, but whenever I launch the Mod I keep getting an error message that says an unhandled exception has occurred in my application. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/31 "2008-10-11T13:28:01Z")
I was looking for the mod but couldn’t find it. Link? ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/32 "2008-10-11T14:21:26Z")
> [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](#): > > I was looking for the mod but couldn’t find it. Link? [Here ya go](http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=922050). ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/33 "2008-10-11T14:51:54Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > [Here ya go](http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=922050). “No thread specified”. Fail. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/34 "2008-10-11T20:11:24Z")
[Let’s try this again](http://www.twcenter.net/forums/showthread.php?t=92205). ---
**Author:** ![appleciders](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85f322/32.png) [@appleciders](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/appleciders)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2008, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/35 "2008-10-12T17:10:49Z")
> [@Gorsnak](#): > > I’m also looking forward to it. My last game of M2:TW I played the Turks. First thing I did was load all my troops onto a boat, sailed through the Mediterranean, and landed in Dublin.\* After eliminating the Scots and English, I sat on the British Isles teching up until I had Janissary musketeers, and then I blitzed Europe. Twas great fun, but the musketeers had a few issues. Most critically, vulnerability to cavalry charges. Naturally I kept a bunch of Janissary heavy infantry around to deal with horsies, but the Turks really lack appropriate troops to absorb a real charge. And even if you have pikemen, they’re obscenely unwieldy in the game. I have found it absolutely impossible to use them in such a way as to actually protect gunpowder troops from cavalry. Actually, I find pikes in M2:TW to be completely useless in every case except defending a gate. They’re even more hopeless than phalanx formations in Rome. Yeah, I think several mods take away the pikemens’ ability to switch to swords, forcing the to stick with the pike, which helps a bit. The Turks have some pretty badass spearmen, though, which are really easy to work with, compared to pikemen, if not quite so devastating against charges. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/36 "2008-10-21T06:03:45Z")
[Here is a video on the land battles of Empire: Total War](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OaBiLBDj8rs) and I’m being stupid because the more I read about it the more I’m getting excited, and getting excited over a game is bad because it usually means it’s going to suck. I played “Imperial Glory” in the past and while a substandard game I did like how on the tactical map units could occupy the buildings and the attackers had to fight hand-to-hand for it. I’m glad to see they’ve incorporated that. Basically, it has everything I wanted. And I need to start reading up on 18th century warfare in order to have a basis to base my tactics on. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/37 "2008-10-21T14:43:50Z")
So…um… Am I going to need a new video card? ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/38 "2008-10-21T14:49:35Z")
> [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](#): > > So…um… > Am I going to need a new video card? Yeah, I have the very same thought. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/39 "2008-10-21T14:53:33Z")
> [@RandMcnally](#): > > Yeah, I have the very same thought. Shit. I may need a new motherboard as well, then. I fucking hate PC games. Release this game on the consoles and be done with it. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2008, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460/40 "2008-10-21T15:06:30Z")
> [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](#): > > I fucking hate PC games. Release this game on the consoles and be done with it. I can’t imagine how this game would work on a console, unless they import a keyboard and mouse type thingy for it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/empire-total-war/466460.md?page=3)