# English Dopers, Give me the names of some towns over there that we can use as a build **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 10, 2003, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143 "2003-12-10T14:26:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Janx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Janx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Janx)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/1 "2003-12-10T14:26:28Z")
I have a friend here in São Paulo who works for a land developer. The company is just about start construction on a residential high rise. The neighborhood name translates to London Gardens, thus they want to give the building an authentic British name, after an authentic British place. Can’t be a tourist attraction or other well known place, the town already has its share of “Buckinghams” and “London Towers”. Since I’m and American my friend just assumed I would know this stuff, but all I could come up with was “Yorkshire” (which he thought was pretty cool). So help us name that building, give the name of the place and a short description of the sort of town/neighborhood it is. Or we could play a joke and give him the name of a few British ghettos (hea hea) Thanks in advance. Oh. BTW, when they choose a name I will post it here. Some one out there will live with the satisfaction that they named a building in Brazil. Don’t ya just love this inter net thingie?! ---
**Author:** ![everton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecb155/32.png) [@everton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/everton)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/2 "2003-12-10T14:40:57Z")
Well you could choose the names of real parks and gardens in London, such as Kew Gardens, Bushy Park, Green Park, Greenwich Park, Hyde Park, Kensington Gardens, Regent’s Park, Richmond Park and St James’s Park. Or you could choose other [county names](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?postid=4303721#post4303721) to go with Yorkshire. Or you could pick some from [this list](http://www.world-gazetteer.com/d/d_gb_en.htm). ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/3 "2003-12-10T14:46:48Z")
Royston Vasey. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/4 "2003-12-10T14:49:56Z")
Oooh! Oooh! Please use the name “Kingston Blount”!!! It’s the tiny village in which I grew up, and I’d be so honoured. ---
**Author:** ![everton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecb155/32.png) [@everton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/everton)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/5 "2003-12-10T14:50:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by TwistofFate \* > \*\*Royston Vasey. \*\* 😃 Perfect. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/6 "2003-12-10T14:55:47Z")
Leighton Buzzard. ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/7 "2003-12-10T15:04:08Z")
Gotta go with Royston Vasey. That, or Great Snoring (in Norfolk). ---
**Author:** ![Janx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Janx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Janx)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/8 "2003-12-10T15:08:21Z")
Daymn **everton** , you were not fooling around were you! ---
**Author:** ![Janx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Janx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Janx)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/9 "2003-12-10T15:20:37Z")
Careful all, I’m going to google the cool ones, imagine calling the building something like “Edificio Compton”, the way everyone is snickering about “Royston Vasey”, I gotta look that one up. Same goes for “Kingston Blount”, oh BTW, we really can’t consider anything with the word “Buzzard” In it. Sure - Janx welcome to your new home “Buzzards Roost” located beautiful London Gardens. ---
**Author:** ![pierre72](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b2d939/32.png) [@pierre72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pierre72)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/10 "2003-12-10T15:20:48Z")
Authentic British Town Names (unashamedly lifted from Shite’s Unoriginal Miscellany): Pratt’s Bottom (Kent) Sheepwash (Cornwall) Looe (Cornwall) Portwrinkle (Cornwall) Twatt (Orkney) Slaggyford (Northumberland) Nether Wallop (Hampshire) North Piddle (Worcestershire) British-sounding (but probably not real): Warwick Hunt Lower Yerkecks Sputum-On-Th’-Mound Upper Skirtfondle And my favourite (and also real): Upper Ramsbottom (Lancashire) ---
**Author:** ![everton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecb155/32.png) [@everton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/everton)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/11 "2003-12-10T15:31:53Z")
I didn’t leave you short of choices did I? I realise we haven’t gievn you much by way of description so far though. Royston Vasey would be an excellent joke choice. It isn’t a real place name\*, but is the setting for a very funny, very dark BBC comedy series. Strangers are not welcome in Royston Vasey (a sign reading “you’ll never leave” stands at the road into town), and local residents include homicidal butchers, in-bred shopkeepers, voyeuristic landlords, wife stealers and violent manic depressives. \*Royston Vasey is the real life given name of a blue comedian, Roy “Chubby” Brown, whose act consists of a stream of sexual swear words etc. If you want a real place, I’m sure **jjimm’s** village is very pretty. Leighton Buzzard is a boring town just north of London, which is notable only for its wacky name. It’s near Milton Keynes, which is another boring place, but whose name has a slightly Brazilian quality to my ears. ---
**Author:** ![Janx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Janx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Janx)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/12 "2003-12-10T15:44:53Z")
“Royston Vasey” Hardy Har har har! That would be a hoot! ‘Till some one figured our we was havin’ em on! It sounds cool though, I wouldn’t be surprised if they went with it. [Hadfield aka Royston Vasey](http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A563429) > [@](#): > > All was to change when a roving BBC location researcher wandered into town, running out of time to find a small, quiet Northern town that could pass as a quirky, isolated, \*\* fictional town \*\* where visitors were frowned upon and murky secrets dwelt behind every door. One look at the unsuspecting streets of Hadfield1 and her sigh of relief proclaimed the location had been found. Royston Vasey was born and the TV filming circus duly rolled into town. [“Kingston Blount”](http://www.city-visitor.com/kingstonblount/)on the other hand sounds positively charming! Lots of hotels there, and stuff, cant seem to find a description of the place though, at least it is real! ---
**Author:** ![pierre72](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b2d939/32.png) [@pierre72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pierre72)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/13 "2003-12-10T15:45:38Z")
I think I’ve been to **jjimm** ’s village this week - near Chinnor? That right? Only passing through on my way to Princes Risbrough (see - two names there!), then through Leighton Buzzard on to Milton Keynes (BTW - no, not Milton Keynes!) Royston Vasey would be an excellent choice. Nobody but us, and viewers of an obscure BBC2 comedy would understand the joke, and it just sounds … right. Unless I can interest you in “Twatt”? No? You sure?? ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/14 "2003-12-10T15:47:42Z")
To be serious: When I think of a typical English town name, I think of one of my old cricket club’s rival teams, the village of Shipton-under-Wychwood. Also the home of Sam Mendes, the film director. ---
**Author:** ![Janx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Janx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Janx)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/15 "2003-12-10T15:53:12Z")
\*\* pierre72 \*\* wrote… > [@](#): > > Upper Skirtfondle Thats a riot! I’m gonna put that one on the list just to see if it will fly! There is really a town called \* Twatt \*! ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/16 "2003-12-10T16:01:01Z")
Give him the name of famous places from Lord of the Rings, you know, stuff like The Shire, Hobbiton, Rivendell, Isengard, etc. Think how amused anyone travelling there will be when they see the names, and they _sound_ English enough. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/17 "2003-12-10T16:16:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pierre72 \* > **I think I’ve been to jjimm’s village this week - near Chinnor?** That’s right - take junction 6 off the M40 onto the B4009 through Aston Rowant, Kingston Blount, Crowell, Chinnor, then Henton, Bledlow, and Skittle Green to Princes Risborough. (Now Brazil is spoiled for choice!) ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/18 "2003-12-10T16:20:15Z")
Picking names from London Underground stations might give a familiar sound to the places: [http://en2.wikipedia.org/wiki/List\_of\_London\_Underground\_stations](http://en2.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_London_Underground_stations) Or how about the Celtic feel, and name them after whisky? [http://www.craigellachie.com/whiskylist.htm](http://www.craigellachie.com/whiskylist.htm) On the other hand, you could have some fun submitting Moss Side, Toxteth, Oldham, Brixton, Manningham, Handsworth, Broadwater Farm… ---
**Author:** ![Small\_Clanger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9fc348/32.png) [@Small\_Clanger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Small_Clanger)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/19 "2003-12-10T16:30:28Z")
What would be wrong with Milton Keynes given the spirit of the original post? Milton Keynes House in the tradition of Olde England. The building could have fake Tudor beams leaded windows and stuff. For a London connection and homage to Spinal Tap _Squatney Towers_? Yes Twatt is real (two Twatts actually) but they’re in Scotland. ---
**Author:** ![World\_Eater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f04885/32.png) [@World\_Eater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/World_Eater)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2003, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143/20 "2003-12-10T16:39:22Z")
How about calling it “The Kensington”? Yeah, it’s lame, I just wanted to be in the running. 😃 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-dopers-give-me-the-names-of-some-towns-over-there-that-we-can-use-as-a-build/218143.md?page=2)