# English Premier League and Football in General **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 1, 2005, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867 "2005-02-01T22:49:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 23
**Author:** ![roger\_thornhill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@roger\_thornhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roger_thornhill)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2005, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/441 "2005-03-20T03:35:44Z")
Blackburn _ought_ to be relegated for being so boring. I’m quite confident about my picks for the drop, the three promoted clubs, but I’d love to see West Brom (managed by the great “There’s Only One”) stay up. I note they’re still to play the Yids (oops! sorry - force of habit - I’m a racist so-and-so - or should that be ethnicist, or sectarian?..what the heck, you can call me Tim, so long as you don’t call me Hun), so that should be 3 points. Here are the teams that are involved, showing no. of games playes (out of 38), goal difference and points: Birmingham 29 -6 32 Blackburn 30 -12 32 Portsmouth 30 -14 31 Fulham 29 -14 30 Crystal Palace 30 -16 26 Southampton 29 -14 24 West Brom 30 -22 24 Norwich 30 -30 20 Only Soton and West Brom can count as form teams, so things are very interesting. If Birmingham can notch up their customary win today against Villa, then they’re safe. Pompey are in a spot; Fulham should pull through (esp as they have a good goalie). So my revised tips: Naaaaarch, Palace and Pompey (with a big dose of wishful thinking). ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2005, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/442 "2005-03-20T03:42:34Z")
I would consider Blackburn to be in form, despite the loss to the Gunners. The goal in that game was only their second conceded in something like eight PL games. And yes they are boring. ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2005, 9:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/443 "2005-03-20T09:00:17Z")
Hey, if boring keeps you from being relegated, I see nothing wrong with it. ---
**Author:** ![ISiddiqui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/97f17d/32.png) [@ISiddiqui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ISiddiqui)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2005, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/444 "2005-03-20T09:01:20Z")
… after all, it could be worse. They could be an Italian team ;). ---
**Author:** ![Legolamb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4491bb/32.png) [@Legolamb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legolamb)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2005, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/445 "2005-03-20T10:46:29Z")
> [@Gangster Octopus](#): > > And yes they are boring. Yup, but like I said before, if we had a decent striker or two we could almost be like Arsenal under George Graham. Boring but getting results. ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2005, 10:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/446 "2005-03-20T10:48:25Z")
If you want boring - you need Bolton. Yes it’s effective but by God it’s deadly dull stuff. What happened to Jay Jay? He could play a bit. A nice win yesterday, keeps our UEFA hopes just alive enough to kick us in the teeth again. I didn’t see the elbow at the game but it looked pretty grim on the telly (and the elbowed bloke had claret everywhere). I think Atouba will be getting a call from the FA on Monday morning. ---
**Author:** ![roger\_thornhill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@roger\_thornhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roger_thornhill)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2005, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/447 "2005-03-21T01:20:56Z")
Do you think Dante was thinking of being forced to watch Blackburn play Bolton when he wrote about purgatory? Would account for all those zombie-like creatures walking round the perimeter of the pitch at Ewood during games. ---
**Author:** ![One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/838e76/32.png) [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/One_And_Only_Wanderers)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2005, 8:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/448 "2005-03-21T08:04:55Z")
> [@owlstretchingtime](#): > > If you want boring - you need Bolton. Yes it’s effective but by God it’s deadly dull stuff. > > What happened to Jay Jay? He could play a bit. > > A nice win yesterday, keeps our UEFA hopes just alive enough to kick us in the teeth again. I didn’t see the elbow at the game but it looked pretty grim on the telly (and the elbowed bloke had claret everywhere). I think Atouba will be getting a call from the FA on Monday morning. Didn’t think the Norwich game was dull at all. Smashing shot from Stelios, and Hierro and Candela had some fine shots that the woodwork blocked. It was nice to see some shots from open play rather than the 6 yard scrapping we normally get goals from. What’s Spurs run in like? I’m still hoping to collect on that bet i have with a work colleague that Bolton will finish above you. ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2005, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/449 "2005-03-21T12:10:32Z")
Spur’s run in (with madly optinmistic predictions): 02 April 2005 Barclays Premiership Birmingham v Tottenham, 15:00 ## Spurs win 10 April 2005 Barclays Premiership Tottenham v Newcastle, 16:05 ## Draw 16 April 2005 Barclays Premiership Liverpool v Tottenham, 15:00 ## Lose 20 April 2005 Barclays Premiership Tottenham v West Brom, 19:45 ## Muller them 25 April 2005 Barclays Premiership Arsenal v Tottenham, 20:00 ## One can but hope - but probably lose 01 May 2005 Barclays Premiership Tottenham v Aston Villa, 13:00 ## BEAT THEM LIKE A GINGER STEP CHILD 07 May 2005 Barclays Premiership Middlesbrough v Tottenham, 15:00 ## Boro are a right mess - win 15 May 2005 Barclays Premiership Tottenham v Blackburn, 15:00 If blackburn are comfortable - win, if not lose Yesterday we managed to go up a place in the league without playing as Boro’s goal difference got worse than ours. I can’t recall that happening before. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2005, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/450 "2005-03-21T22:05:56Z")
If anyone’s interested, here’s a clip of [Claudio Reyna scoring against Spurs](http://home.earthlink.net/~wjarrettc/movies/reyna.wmv) this weekend. ---
**Author:** ![roger\_thornhill](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d9b06d/32.png) [@roger\_thornhill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roger_thornhill)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/451 "2005-03-22T02:00:19Z")
My predictions in bold: Birmingham v Tottenham - win - **lose** Tottenham v Newcastle - draw - **win** Liverpool v Tottenham - lose - **draw** Tottenham v West Brom - win - **draw** (there’s only one Bryan Robson) Arsenal v Tottenham - lose - **draw** Tottenham v Aston Villa - win - **win** Middlesbrough v Tottenham - win - **draw** (Soton are a notch above you lot) Tottenham v Blackburn - win or lose(!) - **draw** ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 12:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/452 "2005-03-22T12:12:23Z")
> [@roger thornhill](#): > > My predictions in bold: > Birmingham v Tottenham - win - **lose** > Tottenham v Newcastle - draw - **win** > Liverpool v Tottenham - lose - **draw** > Tottenham v West Brom - win - **draw** (there’s only one Bryan Robson) > Arsenal v Tottenham - lose - **draw** > Tottenham v Aston Villa - win - **win** > Middlesbrough v Tottenham - win - **draw** (Soton are a notch above you lot) > Tottenham v Blackburn - win or lose(!) - **draw** I’m not counting the last game, as I think that if it matters to either side then they will win so you give us two points less than I do. Either case should be good enough for UEFA (with a bit of luck on other team’s results) ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/453 "2005-03-22T12:59:49Z")
USA has a WC qualifier at Azteca this Saturday (nothing like playing at 7300’ feet in really bad air) and then again a few days later against Guatemala at Birmingham. Does UEFA also have qualifiers this weekend, or is it just a CONCACAF thing? And if there are UEFA qualifiers is their a mini-break in EPL and CL games, or no? ---
**Author:** ![One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/838e76/32.png) [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/One_And_Only_Wanderers)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/454 "2005-03-22T14:08:18Z")
There are WC qualifiers in Europe this weekend too. England has Northern Ireland on Saturday and Azerbaijan on wednesday. I don’t believe there is any club football this weekend. ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/455 "2005-03-22T14:49:19Z")
There’s loads of club football - there’s no Premiership though, but all the other leagues are playing. ---
**Author:** ![One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/838e76/32.png) [@One\_And\_Only\_Wanderers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/One_And_Only_Wanderers)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/456 "2005-03-22T15:08:47Z")
That’s not fair on all those lower league teams that have Northern Ireland players!! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/457 "2005-03-22T15:16:00Z")
In fact if you have a lot of call ups (i think its more than three first teamers) you can get the game postponed. Even if they’re being called up to two-bob sides like Northern Ireland, Scotland or America (_ducks_) ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2005, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/458 "2005-03-22T16:06:15Z")
> [@One And Only Wanderers](#): > > There are WC qualifiers in Europe this weekend too. England has Northern Ireland on Saturday and Azerbaijan on wednesday. I don’t believe there is any club football this weekend. Anybody can beat Northern Ireland – the trick is to hit the ball straight at their keeper and then wait for him to drop it. ---
**Author:** ![Ivar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ivar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ivar)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2005, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/459 "2005-03-23T23:15:10Z")
> [@owlstretchingtime](#): > > It’s not just 1913 though is it? - it’s the bribing your way into the league, buggering about with tube station names and so on - your stadium’s on wheels it moves every so often, it’s due another move now that the bailiffs have caught up with you again. > > Not to mention that you’ve got a team full of luggage stealing, gold smuggling, wife beating, drink-driving sex pests. And one unmarried centre half. And an unmarried midfielder, and a manager with a cheeky smile. > > Other than that you’re all lovely 😉 > > Would you like to come and hold some European winners medals. It would make a nice change for you. > > D’ya like dags? Back finally. I just find it odd that after all these years, Sp_rs fans are still bent out shape by what Sir Henry did in 1918. Get over it! It’s not like we’re all proud of what that asshole (and he was) did so long ago. I could shout “18-8” every time I encountered a Sp_rs supporter, but I don’t, because it would be idiotic to continue to refer to it. And changing the tube stop name? It’s so trivial, is it worth it? Oh, and Arsenal moving to another stadium? The continued complaints from your end stink of sour grapes. Bully to you for your Euro trophies. Don’t you worry, we’ll get ours. And yes, Dennis Bergkamp is god. And he’s a hard ass, but he’s no more a cheat than anyone else out there. He has to defend himself because he is always a target. Loved the references to Storey and Adams et. al. It seems this Yank does know a bit… what the hell are Dags? ---
**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2005, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867/460 "2005-03-24T10:55:29Z")
> [@Ivar](#): > > Loved the references to Storey and Adams et. al. > It seems this Yank does know a bit… > > what the hell are Dags? I’m not a yank dear heart. I’m an actual rufty tufty season ticket holder at the The Lane. “Dags” - you need to see Snatch. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867.md?page=22) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/english-premier-league-and-football-in-general/287867.md?page=24)