# Enough with the Fuckin' Vampires **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 17, 2010, 6:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001 "2010-07-17T06:28:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/61 "2010-07-19T00:14:09Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > Playing right now on my cable system… > \*Lust at First Bite > \* Pure curiosity… \*\*\*Love \*\*\*at first Bite? Although IMDB does tell me that there is a _Lust at First Bite_ aka _Dracula Sucks_ porn movie… which interestingly also dates to 1979… Inquiring minds and all that. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/62 "2010-07-19T18:16:42Z")
> [@Martini\_Enfield](#): > > I’d be interested in some titles of movies which you think are of the “Full of bouncing titties/must have a strip club scene” because I must say I can’t recall many non-porn (softcore or otherwise) films from the past few years that would qualify, with the exception of things like _Sin City_ and a couple of other films clearly aimed at a more “Mature” audience than your standard “R” rated movie. > > Obviously there’s going to be nudity in “Mainstream” films, but I certainly don’t recall (and haven’t noticed) it being _de rigueur_ in the way you’re suggesting it is, at any rate. Actually, I can’t think of the last movie that I watched. It’s been a few years. I got so bored with the whole “we gotta have titties” theme that I just haven’t been watching movies, other than things like the Toy Stories. This wasn’t a concious decision, and certainly the gratuitous sex and sexuality wasn’t the only reason, or even the main reason, why I’ve quit watching movies. But it’s part of it. I’m a partial nudist myself. Right now, I’m wearing a pair of glasses, a pair of panties, and a pair of flipflops. It’s summer, I’m in Texas, and it’s HOT. I don’t mind other people being nude so much as I mind the notion that I should pay a small fortune in ticket and concessions to waste a quarter of the screen time looking at stuff that bores me. And female tits bore me. If I’m gonna look at nekkid peoples, I demand equal rights, I want to look at nekkid or nearly nekkid men. And no, men without shirts is NOT the same thing as women without shirts. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/63 "2010-07-19T19:13:23Z")
> [@Stoneburg](#): > > I’d like a sci-fi boom as big as this boring vampire boom now. Science fiction has an undercurrent of rational thought. Vampires, like other fantasy, have an undercurrent of magical thought. _You_ guess which is more common these days. Though you can treat magic rationally (see Poul Anderson’s _Operation Chaos_ and S. M. Stirling’s _Dies the Fire_), and you can treat science magically (see Ray Bradbury’s _Mars_ stories). ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/64 "2010-07-19T20:07:58Z")
> [@Fiveyearlurker](#): > > The Passage by Justin Cronin is currently on the best seller’s list. Pretty decent book. I think this is the one **cricetus** is referring too, but not sure. I keep hearing about it, and as a horror buff I feel I _ought_ to read it, and if it’s good I don’t want to miss it…but vampires _again_? Just thinking about it makes me tired. Maybe I’m anemic. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/65 "2010-07-19T20:24:36Z")
This is one of the worst results of the women’s rights movement. It’s OK though, we still have zombies. ---
**Author:** ![Fiveyearlurker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@Fiveyearlurker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fiveyearlurker)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/66 "2010-07-19T21:16:55Z")
> [@Dung\_Beetle](#): > > I keep hearing about it, and as a horror buff I feel I _ought_ to read it, and if it’s good I don’t want to miss it…but vampires _again_? Just thinking about it makes me tired. > > Maybe I’m anemic. They’re more like fast zombies with the caveats that they can’t stand light, and have a weakness in their chest where they can be shot or stabbed. They are strong, can jump and long lived, but not charming or really even very thinking. It’s a long book, and the first third is pretty good. After that it fast forwards 100 years, and then it’s kind of annoying. ---
**Author:** ![Damuri\_Ajashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Damuri\_Ajashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damuri_Ajashi)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/67 "2010-07-19T21:18:18Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > I really don’t get it. A three hundred year old delusion is no more respectable than last week’s desusion. Yep. As a literaly figure, yep. Now if Twilight has the staying power of Dracula or Lord of the Rings, it gains some respectability. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/68 "2010-07-19T22:25:25Z")
I think we are rapidly approaching a Vampire media event horizon that will have a similar effect to the well known shoe event horizon on your civilization… I’m planning to turn into a bat. -XT ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2010, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/69 "2010-07-19T23:19:01Z")
This thread actually turned out to be pretty interesting. I have a Chinese-American friend who told me that in China, vampires hop. I thought, ‘‘The only thing lamer than a vampire is a hopping vampire.’’ ---
**Author:** ![Martini\_Enfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/martini_enfield/32/11123_2.png) [@Martini\_Enfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martini_Enfield)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/70 "2010-07-20T01:17:47Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > Actually, I can’t think of the last movie that I watched. It’s been a few years. I got so bored with the whole “we gotta have titties” theme that I just haven’t been watching movies, other than things like the Toy Stories. This wasn’t a concious decision, and certainly the gratuitous sex and sexuality wasn’t the only reason, or even the main reason, why I’ve quit watching movies. But it’s part of it. The thing is, I still can’t think of many non-porn “mainstream” movies even from 10 years ago or so that fit your description of being full of quasi-softcore porn, bouncing breasts, etc. Certainly nothing that got a cinema release- I can’t speak for “Straight To Video” or “Made for TV” films because yeah, a lot of that stuff has gratuitous nudity/sex/lesbianism in it, but “Movies you’d go to a multiplex to see”? I’m just not recalling many. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/71 "2010-07-20T03:01:00Z")
> [@olivesmarch4th](#): > > This thread actually turned out to be pretty interesting. > > I have a Chinese-American friend who told me that in China, vampires hop. I thought, ‘‘The only thing lamer than a vampire is a hopping vampire.’’ How about vampire [pumpkins](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_pumpkins_and_watermelons)? That lame enough for ya ? ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/72 "2010-07-20T03:35:50Z")
I’ve had it with these motherfucking vampires on this motherfucking plane! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/73 "2010-07-20T03:43:11Z")
Just a little aside – I happened upon _Twilight_ fanblog once. The title? “Pillow Biters.” 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Damuri\_Ajashi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Damuri\_Ajashi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Damuri_Ajashi)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/74 "2010-07-20T04:07:22Z")
> [@Martini\_Enfield](#): > > The thing is, I still can’t think of many non-porn “mainstream” movies even from 10 years ago or so that fit your description of being full of quasi-softcore porn, bouncing breasts, etc. Certainly nothing that got a cinema release- I can’t speak for “Straight To Video” or “Made for TV” films because yeah, a lot of that stuff has gratuitous nudity/sex/lesbianism in it, but “Movies you’d go to a multiplex to see”? I’m just not recalling many. I got a theory. A convergence of the social uptightening of America combined with movie production prices that require movies to appeal to almost the entire population in order to be profitable. How many NC-17 movies have come out in the last year? How many R compared to the number of PG-13 (which basically means PG with more violence or cursing). ---
**Author:** ![tnetennba](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@tnetennba](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tnetennba)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/75 "2010-07-20T04:24:07Z")
> [@Kobal2](#): > > How about vampire [pumpkins](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_pumpkins_and_watermelons)? That lame enough for ya ? That is fucking awesome! ---
**Author:** ![Fish\_Nya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@Fish\_Nya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish_Nya)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/76 "2010-07-20T04:48:41Z")
For any vampire discussion, I find [this](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tables_of_vampire_traits) necessary. If only to keep myself up-to-date on very important vampire facts. Really, I just like to see the humorous vampires next to the “serious” ones. Count Chocula’s powers and weaknesses make me smile every time. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/77 "2010-07-20T05:04:48Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > You know what would be worse than nothing but Vampires? Wall to wall Ashton Kutcher movies. Hmmm . . . Are they casting any more Anne Rice movies? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/78 "2010-07-20T05:10:12Z")
You might expect TVTropes to have a “Vampire” page . . . but you would be wrong. It has [a whole **directory** of “Vampire Tropes” pages.](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/VampireTropes) (I am creeping silently to your monitor . . . I am slowly draining your time . . . Do not resist . . .) ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/79 "2010-07-20T05:22:40Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Just a little aside – I happened upon _Twilight_ fanblog once. The title? “Pillow Biters.” The only pillow biter I know of is Hobbes the tiger during a nightmare. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2010, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001/80 "2010-07-20T05:29:25Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > Just a little aside – I happened upon _Twilight_ fanblog once. The title? “Pillow Biters.” > > 😛 😕 That makes no sense at all! Who sleeps on pillows full of blood?! (I mean, you know, other than me.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-fuckin-vampires/547001.md?page=5)