# Enough with the horrible, disgusting hags in MILF porn! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 8, 2007, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265 "2007-12-08T05:46:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Darryl\_Lict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7cd45c/32.png) [@Darryl\_Lict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darryl_Lict)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/41 "2007-12-09T00:54:30Z")
[QUOTE=teela brown] Mother-In-Law Fetish? [/QUOTE] Heh. Did you just make that up? ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/42 "2007-12-09T00:57:47Z")
[QUOTE=Vinyl Turnip] My mother’s never even \*heard \* of sex. [/QUOTE] She closed her eyes and thought of England? ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/43 "2007-12-09T02:40:21Z")
[QUOTE=VCO3] However, 99.9% of the women that turn up in this stuff are DISGUSTING HAGS. [/QUOTE] You’re looking at the wrong sites. My MILF searching experiences are generally positive although it is true that every once in a great while there will be a questionable appearance but that danger exists no matter what you’re looking for. I guess it also depends on how old you consider a MILF. Thirty-late forties is good and I’ve seen stunningly hot women in their mid to late fifties even. Whatever you do, don’t click on anything that says “mature.” That is a warning sign. > [@Shalmanese](#): > > “MILF” is used to describe porn in the same way “full figured” is for personal ads and “cozy” is for houses. It means there was nothing more flattering you could say about it. Burn the infidel. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/44 "2007-12-09T02:46:03Z")
[QUOTE=Sunspace] I just like to see good-looking women in their thirties and forties. [/QUOTE] I suspect a lot of guys would, if they were prepared to admit there _was_ such a thing. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/45 "2007-12-09T05:27:11Z")
[QUOTE=bathsheba] It’s a jailable offense. They most certainly are not capable of giving their consent. These are demented old ladies, most of whom no longer have the power of speech. [/QUOTE] Well, thank God for that. I knew it was bad (and could get a nurse’s license revoked), but I didn’t know about the crime aspect. ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 8:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/46 "2007-12-09T08:49:31Z")
Frankly, most Internet porn genres are like this. “You like blonde/black/Hispanic/brunette/thin/fat women? Then you’ll love _every_ blonde/black/hispanic/brunette/thin/fat woman!” I don’t let it get to me; I just download the stuff that looks good to me and skip the rest. I also refuse to pay for porn for any reason, since I’ve been ripped off that way before; I bought (what looked like) a hot young-Hispanic-women DVD and 3/4 of it turned out to be this 60-year-old French woman getting gangbanged. Simply put, most porn sucks, so maximize your control over what you view and don’t let the crappy stuff get to you. What _really_ bugs me, because sometimes you can’t tell it’s going to be in the video before you download it, is the blatantly fake dirty talk. I can’t stand hearing the people spew some bullshit lines at each other about how much they loooooooooove each other’s genitalia and juices all over their face or whatever. Instant turnoff. Sometimes you can tell from the preview pictures because someone’s got their mouth open as if gasping in pleasure and they’re staring at the camera and they’ve got this “when can I go home and spend this money on coke?” look on their face. Which only makes it that much more irritating to have it slip past my radar and then pop up right when I’m about to, er, reach the peak of my viewing experience. (I’ve found that some networks, like Naughty America, are best completely ignored for this reason.) ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 8:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/47 "2007-12-09T08:59:58Z")
> [@Giraffe](#): > > Hey, you have three kids and we’ll see what you look like! I dated a woman who had had two kids and was the hottest thing to hit San Diego since the Cedar fire. Oh, man, was she hot. A real tiger in bed, too. Shame about that green-card thing. BTW, **VCO3** , I know you may not believe me, but I’m glad to see you back. I felt partially responsible when you got suspended. I dunno, maybe I’m just on the Crazy Crack, but I worried about it. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 9:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/48 "2007-12-09T09:35:23Z")
[QUOTE=Baldwin] (Can I hang around you, Teela? Something tells me you’re lucky.) [/QUOTE] Yeah, but then she’ll eat of the Tree of Life, turn into a Protector, and decide you’re a threat to be eliminated. ---
**Author:** ![Merijeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f05b48/32.png) [@Merijeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merijeek)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/49 "2007-12-09T13:28:05Z")
So, there I was, camping with this hot black MILF when she starts yelling at the movie screen… -Joe ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/50 "2007-12-09T15:15:09Z")
[QUOTE=Duck Duck Goose] I am your mother, and you’d be surprised what doesn’t shock me. 😉 Go ahead and 'splain it to her, she can take it. She’s seen the President of the United States getting blowjobs in the Oval Office from an intern and then refusing to man up about it; after that, nothing would surprise her. [/QUOTE] Okay, this post is utterly mystifying. One of two things is true, and I’m eager to find out which. 1. **DDG** is **CMiller** ’s mom, in which case this is indeed a fascinating dialogue. :eek: 2. **DuckDucKGoose** is Chelsea Clinton, in which case, hiya Chelsea !!! Cartooniverse ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/51 "2007-12-09T17:06:58Z")
I think she meant that she is the age of the poster’s mother. I’m an M, not so sure about the ILF, and sometimes I’m not sure if I should be a poster or a mom in here… Myself, I don’t get the reference to the blowjob in the oval office–I keep thinking (whenever someone mentions this)–do you really think this is the first BJ to take place there? It’s not sacred ground–it’s an office. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/52 "2007-12-09T17:33:08Z")
[QUOTE=Duck Duck Goose] She’s seen the President of the United States getting blowjobs in the Oval Office from an intern. . . [/QUOTE] If she really had tapes of that, she would possess a commodity that would be quite lucrative. ---
**Author:** ![Baldwin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baldwin/32/7264_2.png) [@Baldwin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baldwin)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/53 "2007-12-09T18:19:24Z")
[QUOTE=Beware of Doug] There is one pr0n provider whose mature models are overall very attractive amateurs. I swear one British gal they published several large shoots of reminded me so much of a somewhat younger Helen Mirren that it blew my mind (and that ain’t all it blew). I won’t give the name here, but if I tell you it rhymes with “HPJ Spatula and Cherry,” maybe you’ll have heard of/seen it. [/QUOTE] Oh, yeah, that’s a good site. Only took me a day to figure out which one you meant. ---
**Author:** ![jali](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecae2f/32.png) [@jali](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jali)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2007, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/54 "2007-12-09T23:20:19Z")
I’m sooo unhip. I had to go to Wiki to find out what the acronym meant. I’m glad to see you back VCO3 - you’re an interesting guy. Really interesting. ---
**Author:** ![Nzinga\_Seated](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b5ac83/32.png) [@Nzinga\_Seated](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nzinga_Seated)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2007, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/55 "2007-12-10T00:37:14Z")
My husband has some big girl porn. I have watched it with him, (not a regular thing, but it has happened). In it the girls have to be a _certain kind_ of big. When they aren’t, he complains, and points it out to me. “See there? She is big, but her ass is flat and wide, not round and high. And her boobs are flat and saggy, not round and plump. Her gut is bigger than her butt…” When he starts complaining like that, we know we have picked a bad cd. He has always been particular about the kind of chub he chases, and I honestly believes he feels cheated when some porn director doesn’t consider what he thinks is a truly sexy big girl. I told him, the freakin’ casting director is just filming whomever the heck shows up! They don’t expect chubby chaser porn fans to be so critical! Same with milf porn, I guess. They are just assuming that milf fans won’t be picky. I wonder if most guys that like milfs really _don’t_ care if they are kind of run down. And maybe my husband is in the minority as far as guys who actually care about the shape of the fat girls in the porn they watch. ---
**Author:** ![Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heffalump_and_roo/32/7691_2.png) [@Heffalump\_and\_Roo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Heffalump_and_Roo)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2007, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/56 "2007-12-10T00:45:50Z")
[QUOTE=Cartooniverse] Okay, this post is utterly mystifying. One of two things is true, and I’m eager to find out which. 1. **DDG** is **CMiller** ’s mom, in which case this is indeed a fascinating dialogue. :eek: 2. **DuckDucKGoose** is Chelsea Clinton, in which case, hiya Chelsea !!! Cartooniverse [/QUOTE] Boy, do I\*\* really\*\* hope that the universe of choices is bigger than two in this case! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Odesio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/odesio/32/20003_2.png) [@Odesio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odesio)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2007, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/57 "2007-12-10T02:58:59Z")
It’s a little odd that Jocasta made the list of MILFs. I would think she’d belong in one of the incest fetish sites instead. Marc ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2007, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/58 "2007-12-10T06:55:12Z")
**Hostile Dialect:** That’s the great thing about the internet though. You don’t have to download some manufactured nonsense from “Big Porn.” You can rage against the machine and download amateur stuff which tends to be more, er, organic. It seems everyone and their sister (and mom) has a digital camcorder nowadays. ---
**Author:** ![Mosier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ea924/32.png) [@Mosier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mosier)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2007, 8:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/59 "2007-12-10T08:56:52Z")
I look at milf porn because you’re more likely to find women that look like real women. I’m actually annoyed at milf porn for the OPPOSITE reason you are - there are too many super young too-fit women with boob jobs and tight abs that look to be 28 at most. Porn is usually disappointing, because this same female robot archetype is in almost every stupid scene. I’d like REAL women in my porno scenes, please. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [December 10, 2007, 9:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265/60 "2007-12-10T09:14:59Z")
[QUOTE=sturmhauke] Yeah, but then she’ll eat of the Tree of Life, turn into a Protector, and decide you’re a threat to be eliminated. [/QUOTE] It’s worse than that. You make the mistake of thinking that what’s lucky for her is lucky for you, and then you end up using one of your heads to look at the stump where the other one used to be, and at best someone else knocks you down and bundles you into the autodoc before you haemorrhage to death. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enough-with-the-horrible-disgusting-hags-in-milf-porn/429265.md?page=4)