# Enterprise-A Night In Sick Bay **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 16, 2002, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435 "2002-10-16T01:47:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2002, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/61 "2002-10-18T22:27:34Z")
Picard got it on with Neela Darrin, until the firestorm hit and he got all worried about her being on the planet surface, then they broke up and she transferred. So basically if you bang the captain, you lose the career fast track of being on the flagship. Too bad Picard didn’t use common sense and realize that was the only freakin’ time in the whole series that stellar cartographers were in harm’s way (excepting times when the whole ship was threatened, but i digress) and keep her on as his Jerreries tube love muffin. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2002, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/62 "2002-10-18T22:40:45Z")
that would be **Jefferies** tube love muffin. Me type pretty someday. ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2002, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/63 "2002-10-18T22:58:15Z")
If you can’t screw the help, who can you screw! Don’t you know the entire reason that people had Nannies, Butlers, and Maids? Don’t get me started on Chauffers. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2002, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/64 "2002-10-18T23:05:44Z")
“Jefferies tube love muffin”? I’m…I’m shocked. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2002, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/65 "2002-10-18T23:28:27Z")
We don’t talk about those maid outfits in front of Tars on this board, Mister! ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2002, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/66 "2002-10-20T04:26:29Z")
!!! ::begins raunchy maid and Hoshi related daydreams:: ---
**Author:** ![tarragon918](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d26b3c/32.png) [@tarragon918](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tarragon918)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2002, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/67 "2002-10-20T05:22:16Z")
OMG, I can’t believe that I forgot to mention Phlox’ tongue! LOL!!! Still no mention of future sightings of those Tellarites _grumbles_ ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2002, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/68 "2002-10-20T05:30:02Z")
Maybe Chef will make Pork chops sometime… ---
**Author:** ![tarragon918](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d26b3c/32.png) [@tarragon918](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tarragon918)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2002, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/69 "2002-10-20T06:24:17Z")
Tars!!! How could you even suggest that! 😉 LMAO… ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2002, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/70 "2002-10-20T06:44:36Z")
I liked it. Shoot me, I’ve liked all of them. I just don’t analyze them too hard. They entertain me and that’s all I’m asking from them. Plus, anytime you get Archer with his shirt off is a good episode. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [October 20, 2002, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/71 "2002-10-20T19:57:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by OpalCat \* > \*\*I liked it. > > (SNIP) anytime you get Archer with his shirt off is a good episode. \*\* * * * And he had it off twice to boot. ``` Not that I was keeping a running tab or anything. :D ``` ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/72 "2002-10-21T01:48:03Z")
But still no answer on where and how that damn dog gets walked! In Klingon ships, I’m sure their targs (sp?) just go anywhere. That would explain the smell someone always complains about in the Star Trek universe when a Klingon ship is boarded. “Two Girls, A Guy, And A Decon Chamber” the newest UPN sitcom ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/73 "2002-10-21T01:55:23Z")
Good gad NoClueBoy, have you never heard of the “dog watch” on a naval vessel? Amateurs. ^:)^ ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/74 "2002-10-21T01:57:56Z")
“A poop question, sir?!” Sure, I’ll take it. Archer takes Porthos for regular walks or asks other people to take turns doing it. They lead him either into the ship’s little arboretum to his favorite trees and bushes and let it all decompose; or else they take him to a little chamber, sort of like a large litter box, and just empty it or get it all resequenced. You see? I know all the answers. I just can’t prove anything. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/75 "2002-10-21T02:12:33Z")
dog watch? look at my name! I have to ask about everything 'cause I HAVE NO CLUE Where were the Suliban in TOS, TNG, DS9? did they die out? get covered up? the entire federation have new memory ingrams? (i have no clue how to spell, either) ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/76 "2002-10-21T02:37:24Z")
The Suliban evolved into the Republican Party. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/77 "2002-10-21T02:56:02Z")
Suliban? They live on an island with the smooth headed Klingons… ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/78 "2002-10-21T04:39:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NoClueBoy \* > \*\*dog watch? > > look at my name! > > I have to ask about everything 'cause I HAVE NO CLUE > > Where were the Suliban in TOS, TNG, DS9? did they die out? get covered up? the entire federation have new memory ingrams? (i have no clue how to spell, either) \*\* * * * ``` For that matter, where were the Kretassans? ``` Clue 1: It doesn’t matter, ‘cause the writers of TOS, TNG, DS9 and VOY didn’t know nothin’ 'bout Enterprise at the time. Clue 2: Everybody learns to avoid the aforementioned aliens some time between Ent. and TOS. Clue 3: Aforementioned aliens are defeated or driven away. I have so many clues, and absolutely no authority. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/79 "2002-10-21T04:53:20Z")
What’s the difference between human and Vulvan sexual organs? ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2002, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435/80 "2002-10-21T05:15:54Z")
Vulvan? or Vulcan? Freudian slip, eh? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-a-night-in-sick-bay/132435.md?page=5)