# Enterprise Cease Fire spoilers **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 12, 2003, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480 "2003-02-12T00:44:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 18
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 17, 2003, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/341 "2003-03-17T22:55:44Z")
Hint: It’s a _Game_… It _Buggers_ you that you can’t get it right… I’ll play it on a _Speaker For_ you, so loud it will wake _The Dead_… In _The_ bee _Hive_, I put a _Queen_ CD for you _And The Hegemon_… ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/342 "2003-03-18T06:05:19Z")
Orson Scott Card. Now, where’s my jackpot? Was that the right answer? I still want that jackpot! ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/343 "2003-03-18T06:11:32Z")
You know those chocolates that look like gold coins? That’s your jackpot. Just don’t mind the teeth marks. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/344 "2003-03-18T06:13:39Z")
Chocolates instead of filthy nickels and boring vouchers? It’s a dream come true! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/345 "2003-03-18T06:27:23Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Kn_ckers \* > [B **NCB** : Ever tried spotted owl? It’s a lot like… > Chicken. > > C’mon, you knew it was coming. Gimme a break. \*\* I thought you were going to say “Spotted Dick” ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/346 "2003-03-18T06:44:09Z")
Sounds like something for the CDC to investigate. No, seriously…is Spotted Dick similar to Drowned Baby? ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/347 "2003-03-18T06:48:40Z")
[make your own spotted dick](http://www.compulink.co.uk/~ossystems/rfmbs/spotted_dick.html) (the easy way, not the picking up a hooker by the docks way) ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/348 "2003-03-18T06:58:00Z")
## Mmmmmm…I’ll forward that one to Chef. INT. Captain’s Mess Archer and Trip wait for breakfast. Archer hasn’t had any sleep. Chef enters with something unrecognizable and puts it in front of them. Trip gapes at it and does that thing with his eyebrows. Archer: Chef, what the hell is this? Chef: Spotted Dick. Archer gasps, then glares unconvincingly. Trip picks at the glob on his plate. Archer: What did you just say to me? Chef: Spotted Dick–sir. Archer: Calling me “sir” doesn’t make it better! You insubordinate ingrate. You’re confined to the galley cupboard for the rest of the day. Trip nibbles gingerly at a piece of dick. Chef (tearfully): But, Captain… Archer: ‘Butt’ what? You’re only making it worse for yourself. Stay in that damn cupboard for a week. I’ll have Hoshi do the cooking. Chef runs out bawling. Trip tastes the dick and decides it isn’t too bad. He glances at a seething Archer. Archer: What are you looking at? * * * Continue. Or skip it and go look at some other thread. ``` ;) ``` ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/349 "2003-03-18T13:16:38Z")
My Little Crackers don’t know nothin’ about cuisine… ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/350 "2003-03-18T13:19:35Z")
Archer: “What are _you_ looking at?” Trip: “Your dick. You gonna eat that?” ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/351 "2003-03-18T13:56:14Z")
Kn\*ckers: “No, co-workers! I’m not insane! I’m laughing like a loon because I’m reading this spotted-dick Trek script by my Doper buddies! Wait, don’t call Security!” Trip: I never had it before, Cap’n but I actually like dick. You should try it. Archer: I’m just not into that stuff, Trip. Pass the toad in the hole. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/352 "2003-03-18T17:38:26Z")
Very nice, Kn\*ckers, but for accuracy’s sake, you need some stage direction. Before all of Archer’s lines, insert the following: “(furrows his brow, stares pensively out window)” It reads much better that way. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/353 "2003-03-18T18:17:49Z")
Damn you people are sick. I’m proud of you. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/354 "2003-03-18T19:21:59Z")
It’s all **Tars’** doing. He had to go and bring up the darn dick issue in the first place. He still hasn’t told me if it’s similar to drowned baby. British cuisine…mmmmmm. * * * INT. Sick Bay Phlox is futzing around with his little critters. Chef enters with a covered dish. Phlox: Yes, Chef? Chef: I’ve got spotted dick, Doc. ## Phlox: Dick Doc? Ah, yes. Spotted dick. It seems to be going around. I’ve ordered all-day decon for the entire crew. NCB: This is the fourth damn time I’ve told you to get off those Archer/Tucker slash sites! Let me know if you need more links. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/355 "2003-03-18T20:43:17Z")
[http://hallfood.com/gastronomy/4.shtml](http://hallfood.com/gastronomy/4.shtml) Per Patrick O’Brian and the Jack Aubrey novels (upsoming movie Far Side of the World) Spotted Dick and Spotted Dog are the same thing. A drowned baby is spotted dog without the raisins and eggs. I was badly mauled in a British food thread. Don’t get it started again. It is truly evil. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/356 "2003-03-18T21:18:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by vivalostwages \* > **Phlox: Ah, yes. Spotted dick. It seems to be going around. I’ve ordered all-day decon for the entire crew.** Whether or not this is a good idea depends entirely on who gets chosen to spend an hour rubbing gel on Archer’s spotted dick. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/357 "2003-03-18T21:43:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by carnivorousplant \* > \*\*[http://hallfood.com/gastronomy/4.shtml](http://hallfood.com/gastronomy/4.shtml) > > Per Patrick O’Brian and the Jack Aubrey novels (upsoming movie Far Side of the World) Spotted Dick and Spotted Dog are the same thing. A drowned baby is spotted dog without the raisins and eggs. > I was badly mauled in a British food thread. Don’t get it started again. It is truly evil. \*\* * * * Too late. I’ve read many of those books but hadn’t put the two together. Thanks for the clarification; I’ll sleep better now. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/358 "2003-03-18T21:44:17Z")
BTW, my plasma conduits could use a good scrubbing. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/359 "2003-03-18T21:53:07Z")
I’m not gay! (Not that there’s anything wrong with being gay…) * * * Phloxenburger: “Dick Doc? Dick Doc, Dick Doc says the clock! Yes, I do like the mid 1970s soul filtered disco type music. But, that’s not what’s important right now. What’s important is impotence! Gotta get more fo this Dick stuff to the crew, Cheffy Baby.” T’Pol (interjectingly): “Would it help if I were to strip naked, oil myself up, and rub my naked body all over NoClueBoy?” Phloxerwassenbeckerhaggernix: “Couldn’t hurt…” Kirk: "Must… save… time… for… watching… this… episode!" ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [March 18, 2003, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480/360 "2003-03-18T21:54:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by vivalostwages \* > \*\*It’s all **Tars’** doing. He had to go and bring up the darn dick issue in the first place. > \*\* Well, when someone talks about spotted food, i immediately think of British Food. Does anyone know what “Bob’s your uncle” means? And just think what terrible things the British will come up with when they have access to the foods of 1000 planets… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480.md?page=17) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cease-fire-spoilers/154480.md?page=19)