# Enterprise-Cogenitor **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [April 30, 2003, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055 "2003-04-30T02:09:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/181 "2003-05-06T06:34:05Z")
X-Men! We must help [this](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=182054) girl. HaZaa! _:::BAMF:::_ [teleports into a wall] ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/182 "2003-05-06T06:56:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cervaise \* > \*\*Not to be a nitpicker, but it’s probably more like all day. It takes an hour to get into makeup and costume (two or more if you’re an alien), an hour to establish the lighting for each camera setup (it goes slower on a movie set; for episodic TV, they’ve got a template book that gives you everything you need for nine out of ten scenes on common sets, for speed and efficiency), an hour or more to rehearse the camera moves (why? just one reason in a hundred: the boom operator needs to keep the mike out of the frame, and needs to know what the camera’s going to do), up to an hour to shoot each setup, and so on. If you’ve never done it, a shooting set is a remarkably boring place to be. > > The point is, it’s not like Montgomery looks at the script and says, Oh boy, I get to go surfing all week again except for Wednesday when I have to be here for half an hour in the morning. No, he gets the script and says, Oh boy, I get to go surfing all week again except for Wednesday when I have to be here all #\*&$! day with my thumb in my ass. \*\* * * * These things I know, **Cer(Not to be a nitpicker, my elbow!)vaise**. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/183 "2003-05-06T12:27:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*That’s 'cause angels are total wusses. Sitting on clouds, playing their harps and preening their feathers all day … they live lives of pampered luxury. The toughest challenge angels ever face is showing up to choir practice on time. They never have to tackle any **real** problems. Hmph! \*\* I will now forever imagine angels as large, musical pigeons. Don’t stand under 'em. You make a good point though; I mean, when has an angel ever ended up in a differently-gendered alien’s civil rights battle? Never. Angels in the Outfield? Maybe. But angels on Enterpise? I doubt it. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/184 "2003-05-06T15:53:27Z")
Angels on the Enterprise would be treated as alien intruders, and a security team armed with phase pistols would be sent to gun them down. Of course, the angels would be armed with phaser-cutting phasers… ---
**Author:** ![Linus\_Van\_Pelt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@Linus\_Van\_Pelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Linus_Van_Pelt)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/185 "2003-05-06T16:51:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*… > Of course, the angels would be armed with phaser-cutting phasers… \*\* At least. People get their impression of angels from all of those heavenly hosts singing “hallelujas”. They forget about the bad-ass dudes with the flaming swords. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/186 "2003-05-06T17:01:57Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Kn_ckers \* > **I will now forever imagine angels as large, musical pigeons. Don’t stand under 'em.** I was only skimming the thread, and I read “pigeons” as “penises.” My conscious brain caught up in the middle of **tracer** ’s following post, and said, _a la_ Jon Stewart, “Huh-whaa? Best back it up, there, Tex, and see why **Kn\*ckers** is so concerned about not having testicles resting on one’s forehead.” So I scrolled back up, reading more carefully. Having gotten it straightened out, I went cheerfully on with the thread, but since half of me was still occupied with thinking, How the heck did I get “penises” from “pigeons?” as I read **tracer** ’s post, I was surprised again by the mention of “a security team armed with penis pistols.” I don’t even know why I’m telling you people this. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/187 "2003-05-06T17:40:47Z")
Sometimes a penis is just a penis ---
**Author:** ![Skillet38](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Skillet38](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skillet38)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/188 "2003-05-06T17:53:03Z")
didn’t Q used to be on Days of Our Lives ? lets see just how far off base we can get ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/189 "2003-05-06T18:36:53Z")
I suppose the ultimate hijack would be a dieting panda wielding a phaser cutting phase pistol. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/190 "2003-05-06T18:45:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by carnivorousplant \* > \*\*I suppose the ultimate hijack would be a dieting panda wielding a phaser cutting phase pistol. \*\* In Quadraphonic™ sound! [Roger Daltry] **Yyyyeeeeaaaahhhh!!!** [/Roger Daltry] ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/191 "2003-05-06T18:47:21Z")
So what’s on _your_ mind, **Cervaise**? Either way, you still shouldn’t stand under 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/192 "2003-05-06T18:53:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by carnivorousplant \* > \*\*Men are from Mars and Women are meteors crashing into Mars. \*\* that’s why us Martians wear tiny umbrellas on our heads!😉 ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/193 "2003-05-06T19:10:48Z")
Golly gee whiz, **Tars**. You are so weird. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/194 "2003-05-06T20:34:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cervaise \* > **…"a security team armed with penis pistols."** Anyone else curious as to which setting would be stun with a penis pistol? ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/195 "2003-05-06T21:00:12Z")
I guess that depends on what comes out of the barrel. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/196 "2003-05-06T21:05:05Z")
That’s what I was getting at. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/197 "2003-05-06T21:07:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tars Tarkas \* > \*\*that’s why us Martians wear tiny umbrellas on our heads!😉 \*\* Is that a Burroughs thingie? BTW, since all Martains are hatched from eggs, how did John Carter and Dejah Whosis…well, ducks lay eggs, but people…ahem. ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/198 "2003-05-06T21:08:17Z")
I think the very presence of a penis pistol would be stunning. I mean, it isn’t the _traditional_ sideam… ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/199 "2003-05-06T21:09:47Z")
I wonder what the holster would look like… ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2003, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055/200 "2003-05-06T21:11:56Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Kn_ckers \* > \*\*I think the very presence of a penis pistol would be stunning. I mean, it isn’t the _traditional_ sideam… \*\* And when I say “sideam,” of course I mean sidea **r** m. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-cogenitor/172055.md?page=11)