# Enterprise: The Crossing (spoilers) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 31, 2003, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364 "2003-03-31T03:54:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/241 "2003-04-10T19:43:42Z")
**Viva** dressed me. It’s all her fault. The bustiere’s not so bad but this thong is killing me. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/242 "2003-04-10T20:37:10Z")
The dress uniforms were some floor lenght robe thing. In the first season, there was a guy or guys in real skirts. I think it was supposed to be a yeoman’s uniform, or a slash fiction thingie. Ask Kn(\*)ckers. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/243 "2003-04-10T20:40:02Z")
I always assumed it was an ill advised attempt at political correctness by having the men in skirts as well. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/244 "2003-04-10T21:01:26Z")
it was all put to a stop when Ensign Chuck “Gorilla legs” Wangowitz started tromping around in one of them skirts! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/245 "2003-04-10T21:07:46Z")
Aesiron: Perhaps the explanation about Yeopersons uniforms was to cover up the ill advised attempt. Tars: My sister went out with that guy. ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/246 "2003-04-10T21:20:06Z")
Holy shit! **Carni** ’s my long lost brother! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/247 "2003-04-10T22:35:07Z")
Sis! I’m so sorry I took a quarter from that guy to go away while you were sitting on the couch…should have held out for a dollar. ---
**Author:** ![Kn\_ckers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/96bed5/32.png) [@Kn\_ckers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kn_ckers)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/248 "2003-04-10T22:47:36Z")
It’s okay, nobody really missed you. Mom liked me better, anyway. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/249 "2003-04-10T23:03:55Z")
Don’t take that! Tell her she’s adopted! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/250 "2003-04-10T23:24:49Z")
Mom, you’re adopted! Ha! (How was that, Tars?) ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2003, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/251 "2003-04-10T23:39:05Z")
What do you do if your Captain has a tiny… um… Warp coil? ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/252 "2003-04-11T00:01:53Z")
Good job, plant! four thumbs up! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/253 "2003-04-11T00:47:11Z")
Thanks, Tars. I feel a lot better. After the guy gave me the quarter to leave, I hopped a freight to Washington state, where I’ve been living under the pseudonym Bill Gates ever since. Guess I should have sent some money home, but if Mom needed any, all she had to do was go stare at Kn(\*)ckers and her hairy date on the couch. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/254 "2003-04-11T03:18:26Z")
Those men’s skirts in TNG were called “skants.” **Aes** bought one in red to match his cheeks (his face, I mean–when he blushes). 😃 He complains that the go-go boots are tearing out the hair on his legs, though. I want my yeoMAN to bring me something to eat, pronto! NCB: I’d tell the Captain with the teeny weeny warp coil to check out the latest spammail and get himself a shaft-enhancing cream ASAP. ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/255 "2003-04-11T03:33:14Z")
It’s not the size of the warp coil, it’s how you breach the warp core that matters. Right?! _RIGHT?!_ I’m feeling drafty. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/256 "2003-04-11T03:38:37Z")
Somebody needs to scrub out those filthy, filthy plasma conduits. Find some crewmember who’s been naughty. That shouldn’t be too difficult! ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/257 "2003-04-11T03:40:43Z")
I went to the pharmacist and asked if they had Viagra (not that horny ol’ me needs it, just a set up for this apochryphal anecdote) The pharm guy said, “yes.” I asked, “Can I get it over the counter?” He answered, “Depends on how many you take.” Ba-da boom! ---
**Author:** ![Ephemera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8baadc/32.png) [@Ephemera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ephemera)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/258 "2003-04-11T03:41:17Z")
There is _no_ way I am bending over in this outfit while **NoClueBoy** ’s on board. Nuh uh, no way, no how. Find someone else. Where’s Lieutenant **CPlant**? You’re on early tonight. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/259 "2003-04-11T03:44:17Z")
And then NCB dropped his Viagra in the toilet and couldn’t get the lid down. 😃 It’s amazing that the Boards are working for me right now; they usually freeze up and that’s why you don’t usually see me again till after 10pm Viva Ca Time. Will have to get off sooner tonight so as not to tie up the phone (what a lame-oh excuse, and I’d rather stay here, but that’s that). Got more Viagra tales? ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2003, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364/260 "2003-04-11T03:45:32Z")
hey, little boy… You got a real perdy mouth. can you squeel like a pig? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/enterprise-the-crossing-spoilers/165364.md?page=14)