# :),  ;) et al -- for lame scrotes who can't express themselves

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [January 14, 2000, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011 "2000-01-14T21:36:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 11\
**Page:** 2

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/97f17d/32.png) [@Nu\_Vo\_Da\_Da](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nu_Vo_Da_Da)\
**Post date:** [January 16, 2000, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/21 "2000-01-16T22:30:00Z")

</div>

I’ve got to agree with whats been said previously, smileys are really tacky. If you can’t use words well enough the convey what you’re feeling then perhaps a message board isn’t the best use of your time(english classes come to mind). At first they were cute(when they were just the 🙂 type )…and creative in a way, but when they started replacing them with graphics, well thats just tacky.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Boris\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/fbc32d/32.png) [@Boris\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boris_B)\
**Post date:** [January 17, 2000, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/22 "2000-01-17T01:42:00Z")

</div>

On a seriouser note, I’d like to opine that it is very difficult to express something ironically in type without being misconstrued. For example, on one post I asked if I should notify the FCC that there was an error in one of Cecil’s column, and somebody thought I was serious. Clearly, one of us thought the other one was a total ding-dong. Had I put in a little smiley after my FCC reference, I suspect that said ding-dong would have gotten the joke.

So here’s a test. Some of the following sentence will be ironic, and YOU have to guess which ones:  
I am a 200-pound underemployed eccentric from the Pacific Northwest.  
My name in real life is Luigi Raphael Malcolm Gonzales.  
I have a bad bad habit of eating Hostess Cupcakes.  
My donkey’s name is Henry Holograph Huxley.  
I want a schnauzer wit my wienerschnitzel.

Go ahead. Guess! I dare you!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![ReservoirDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8edcca/32.png) [@ReservoirDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ReservoirDog)\
**Post date:** [January 17, 2000, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/23 "2000-01-17T19:47:00Z")

</div>

Boris, I would guess that they are all true. Tell your donkey I say hello.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![bj0rn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a88e57/32.png) [@bj0rn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bj0rn)\
**Post date:** [January 18, 2000, 10:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/24 "2000-01-18T10:34:00Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> You mean we have a way to communicate with BjOrn? 😃

😃  
harharhar(for those graphically imparied, guess that would mean the chief).

i belive smileys are needed for communicating a “mood”. a smiley often relates the seriousness of the post. since we cant relate that via a tone of voice, smileys become essential.

for example, the quote from polycarp, if there wouldnt have been a smiley i would have read it with a different tone. if there would have been a different smiley, the “meaning” wouldnt have been the same.  
like:  
You mean we have a way to communicate with BjOrn? 🙂  
is something different than the original one. and:  
You mean we have a way to communicate with BjOrn? :eek:  
too…

its the flavour in ice cream, the gas we use in cars and the difference between getting some and getting none!

bj0rn - getting some!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\
**Post date:** [January 18, 2000, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/25 "2000-01-18T12:18:00Z")

</div>

bj0rn says:

* * *

its the flavour in ice cream, the gas we use in cars and the difference between getting some and getting none!

* * *

## Please add some smilies there bj0rn, 'cause I for one have NO CLUE what this sentence means. Are you saying you found a girlfriend while filling up your gas tank in Iceland ?

Coldfire

* * *

“You know how complex women are”

- Neil Peart, Rush (1993)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2000, 8:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/26 "2000-01-24T08:57:00Z")

</div>

I hope everyone is having a smiley day!

\<SCRIPT LANGUAGE=“JavaScript1.2”\>  
\< !-- Begin  
var no = 25; // snow number  
var speed = 10; // smaller number moves the snow faster  
var snowflake = “[http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/smile.gif](http://www.straightdope.com/ubb/smile.gif)”;

var ns4up = (document.layers) ? 1 : 0; // browser sniffer  
var ie4up = (document.all) ? 1 : 0;  
var dx, xp, yp; // coordinate and position variables  
var am, stx, sty; // amplitude and step variables  
var i, doc\_width = 800, doc\_height = 600;  
if (ns4up) {  
doc\_width = self.innerWidth;  
doc\_height = self.innerHeight;  
} else if (ie4up) {  
doc\_width = document.body.clientWidth;  
doc\_height = document.body.clientHeight;  
}  
dx = new Array();  
xp = new Array();  
yp = new Array();  
am = new Array();  
stx = new Array();  
sty = new Array();  
for (i = 0; i \< no; ++ i) {  
dx\* = 0; // set coordinate variables  
xp\* = Math.random()_(doc\_width-50); // set position variables  
yp_ = Math.random()_doc\_height;  
am_ = Math.random()_20; // set amplitude variables  
stx_ = 0.02 + Math.random()/10; // set step variables  
sty\* = 0.7 + Math.random(); // set step variables  
if (ns4up) { // set layers  
if (i == 0) {  
document.write("\<layer name=“dot”+ i +"" left=“15” “);  
document.write(“top=“15” visibility=“show”\>\<img src=””);  
document.write(snowflake + “” border=“0”\>\</layer\>");  
} else {  
document.write("\<layer name=“dot”+ i +"" left=“15” “);  
document.write(“top=“15” visibility=“show”\>\<img src=””);  
document.write(snowflake + “” border=“0”\>\</layer\>");  
}  
} else if (ie4up) {  
if (i == 0) {  
document.write("\<div id=“dot”+ i +"" style=“POSITION: “);  
document.write(“absolute; Z-INDEX: “+ i +”; VISIBILITY: “);  
document.write(“visible; TOP: 15px; LEFT: 15px;”\>\<img src=””);  
document.write(snowflake + “” border=“0”\>\</div\>”);  
} else {  
document.write(”\<div id=“dot”+ i +"" style="POSITION: “);  
document.write(“absolute; Z-INDEX: “+ i +”; VISIBILITY: “);  
document.write(“visible; TOP: 15px; LEFT: 15px;”\>\<img src=””);  
document.write(snowflake + “” border=“0”\>\</div\>”);  
}  
}  
}  
function snowNS() { // Netscape main animation function  
for (i = 0; i \< no; ++ i) { // iterate for every dot  
yp\* += sty\*;  
if (yp\* \> doc\_height-50) {  
xp\* = Math.random()_(doc\_width-am_-30);  
yp\* = 0;  
stx\* = 0.02 + Math.random()/10;  
sty\* = 0.7 + Math.random();  
doc\_width = self.innerWidth;  
doc\_height = self.innerHeight;  
}  
dx\* += stx\*;  
document.layers[“dot”+i].top = yp\*;  
document.layers[“dot”+i].left = xp\* + am**Math.sin(dx\*);  
}  
setTimeout(“snowNS()”, speed);  
}  
function snowIE() { // IE main animation function  
for (i = 0; i \< no; ++ i) { // iterate for every dot  
yp\* += sty\*;  
if (yp\* \> doc\_height-50) {  
xp\* = Math.random()_(doc\_width-am_-30);  
yp\* = 0;  
stx\* = 0.02 + Math.random()/10;  
sty\* = 0.7 + Math.random();  
doc\_width = document.body.clientWidth;  
doc\_height = document.body.clientHeight;  
}  
dx\* += stx\*;  
document.all[“dot”+i].style.pixelTop = yp\*;  
document.all[“dot”+i].style.pixelLeft = xp\* + am**Math.sin(dx\*);  
}  
setTimeout(“snowIE()”, speed);  
}  
if (ns4up) {  
snowNS();  
} else if (ie4up) {  
snowIE();  
}  
// End →   
\</script\>

* * *

–  
Teeming Millions: [http://fathom.org/teemingmillions](http://fathom.org/teemingmillions)  
“Meat flaps, yellow!” - DrainBead, naked co-ed Twister chat  
O p a l C a t  
[www.opalcat.com](http://www.opalcat.com)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![fuzzy-wuzzy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b38774/32.png) [@fuzzy-wuzzy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fuzzy-wuzzy)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2000, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/27 "2000-01-24T12:49:00Z")

</div>

In the course of life you will learn not to argue with a female on any subject regardless of whether you think she’s an idiot or not

* * *

“Do or do not, there is no try” - Yoda

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2000, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/28 "2000-01-24T13:59:00Z")

</div>

I’m with the Chief to some extent. Smilies strike me as something like training wheels for those who haven’t learned to experess themselves properly in words. I don’t have anything against smilies _per se_, but I think their overuse says loads about the poster’s literacy level. And anyhoo, the original, American-style, sideways “smilies” always struck me as kind of dumb. Happy to say that I’ve never used them. (^o^)/

DHR

* * *

_Exits, pursued by a bear_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![The\_Asbestos\_Mango](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@The\_Asbestos\_Mango](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Asbestos_Mango)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2000, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/29 "2000-01-24T21:07:00Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> Originally posted by OpalCat:  
> \*\* 🙂 :o  
> &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; 😃  
> &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; :p&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ☹  
> &nbsp;&nbsp; :eek:&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; 😕  
> :mad:&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; 😉  
> What’s the matter?  
> &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; :rolleyes:  
> &nbsp;&nbsp;\<img src=http://fathom.org/opalcat/smileysex5.gif\>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ☹  
> &nbsp;&nbsp; :eek:&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; 😕  
> :mad:&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; 😉  
> What’s the matter?&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ☹  
> &nbsp;&nbsp; :eek:&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; 😕  
> :mad:&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; 😉  
> What’s the matter?
> 
> \*\*

Wow. I’m impressed.

* * *

The trouble with Sir Launcelot is by the time he comes riding up, you’ve already married King Arthur.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![jab1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ee7513/32.png) [@jab1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jab1)\
**Post date:** [January 24, 2000, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/30 "2000-01-24T23:50:00Z")

</div>

Yeah, OpalCat rules!

* * *

\>\< DARWIN \>  
\_\_ **L\_\_\_L**

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Jophiel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jophiel/32/66_2.png) [@Jophiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jophiel)\
**Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011/31 "2000-01-25T06:24:00Z")

</div>

:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o  
:o :o :o 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 :o :o :o  
:o :o 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 :o :o  
:o 🙂 🙂 🙂 😛 🙂 🙂 😛 🙂 🙂 🙂 :o  
:o 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 :o  
:o 🙂 🙂 ☹ 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 ☹ 🙂 🙂 :o  
:o 🙂 🙂 🙂 ☹ 🙂 🙂 ☹ 🙂 🙂 🙂 :o  
:o :o 🙂 🙂 🙂 ☹ ☹ 🙂 🙂 🙂 :o :o  
:o :o :o 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 :o :o :o  
:o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o

If this works, there’s probably a special place in hell reserved for me.

If it doesn’t, it’ll probably break the board and get me shot.

Way to live dangerously.

* * *

“I guess one person can make a difference, although most of the time they probably shouldn’t.”

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/et-al-for-lame-scrotes-who-cant-express-themselves/4011.md?page=1)