# Euphemisms for menstruation? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 7, 2009, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786 "2009-02-07T04:28:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2009, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/61 "2009-02-07T23:21:05Z")
I saw a reference somewhere to “dragon time” and liked that. Except that I’m mostly likely to breathe fire the few days beforehand, not during. And I never found it hard to take a pill every day, even though the pills didn’t like me much. Neither did the ring, either. Woo-hoo, menstrual migraines, which I don’t get off hormones. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Alias](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a88e4f/32.png) [@Alias](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alias)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2009, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/62 "2009-02-07T23:32:11Z")
> [@Ferret\_Herder](#): > > Shark week. Damn! That’s what I came in to say. I just heard it for the first time the other day, and I cracked up about it. ---
**Author:** ![not\_alice](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_alice/32/7283_2.png) [@not\_alice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_alice)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/63 "2009-02-08T00:06:37Z")
In Japan, it is “Flag Day” ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/64 "2009-02-08T03:44:52Z")
> [@Karyn](#): > > I hate that 'Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday every dayyyyyyyyy" commercial for birth control. I’m 49, my partner had a vasectomy 20 years ago and the last thing I need is birth control but that song gets stuck in my head for hours. Totally off topic here, but that exact point in my life was when I started taking the pill for the very first time. I thought it was pretty funny. And I hate that song, too. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/65 "2009-02-08T04:10:12Z")
I’ve always just said, “I don’t feel well”. Of course, since when I’m saying that I’m lying on the couch moaning and screaming, my mom usually gets my meaning. (My dad, on the other hand, asks “What’s wrong with her? No, really, what is it?” until he’s embarrassed the heck out of us). Thank God for [Seasonique](http://www.seasonique.com/Consumer/BodyAndPeriod/FewerPeriodsPossible.aspx). If I had to have my period every month again I’d go insane. ---
**Author:** ![trapezoidal\_jellyfish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6f9a4e/32.png) [@trapezoidal\_jellyfish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/trapezoidal_jellyfish)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/66 "2009-02-08T06:18:38Z")
my grandmother calls it “the stomachache.” I’ve also heard “my friend from down under.” as for me, I usually go with “crap! already!?!” ---
**Author:** ![Sodalite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@Sodalite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sodalite)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 7:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/67 "2009-02-08T07:39:41Z")
Another 9 year old starter here, and it was on our family trip to Disney World. I knew what it was from seeing my Mom’s pads and asking questions, but I was far from prepared. The cramps (which I hadn’t been warned about) started the day before. I just thought I had the Worst Stomach Ache Ever. When I saw the red spots I figured things out and I was pissed. I had always been told it was years away, but here it was screwing up my good time. My friends and I have called it various things over the years. “On the little white boat” was popular in middle school. “Sailing the Red Sea” was another. As we got older the expressions became a bit more crude. “Riding with the devil in the bitchmobile” was always good for a laugh. “I’m untrustworthy right now” which I think came from South Park. Something about not trusting a creature that bleeds for a week but doesn’t die. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 8:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/68 "2009-02-08T08:22:07Z")
I started when I was 13. I remember it well, I had missed the bus so I was waiting around the house for my mom to drive me to school and then suddenly I felt something - odd. Ran to the bathroom and there it was. I was never so happy to have missed the bus in my life. Mini-Marli has been in her room giggling with her friends on the phone all weekend. Sometimes I really really wish I was the kind of mother who eavesdropped. I think “shark week” is my new favorite. ---
**Author:** ![tumbleddown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@tumbleddown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tumbleddown)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/69 "2009-02-08T16:15:30Z")
> [@ivan\_astikov](#): > > From my recall it’s just ‘having the painters in’ and it’s use is more a way of saying ‘normal service will soon be resumed’, than a descriptor of the actual process. imo. I asked for a clarification, I was told the painters paint things red, the builders erect scaffolding in the alcove. (i.e. the paint is about the bleeding, the building refers to cramps.) ---
**Author:** ![Euryphaessa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Euryphaessa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euryphaessa)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/70 "2009-02-08T22:06:13Z")
My best friend and I say “Aunt Irma’s visiting” from an episode of The IT Crowd. Cramps are Irma punching you in the stomach. She’s a terrible fucking houseguest. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2009, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/71 "2009-02-08T22:37:09Z")
No love for “Goin’ Postal”? ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Zappa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71e660/32.png) [@Mama\_Zappa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Zappa)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/72 "2009-02-09T00:09:13Z")
> [@Santo\_Rugger](#): > > Riding the cotton pony. > … Heh - I thought I was the only person who’d heard of that one. My high school friends and I used to say “Hi Ho Kotex… awaaaaaaay!!!”. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/73 "2009-02-09T00:30:07Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > No love for “Goin’ Postal”? Always a good one. \*\*Shark Week \*\*and \*\*Vampire Soup \*\*are my two new favorites. and special prop to **Oni no maggi** and her cycle. And the entire **Crimson Tide** which is always a good one, has always mystified me as well as the name of a college team. Only if they could play against the _Spooje Chuckers_ or something equally penile. ---
**Author:** ![Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8c91f0/32.png) [@Bam\_Boo\_Gut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bam_Boo_Gut)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/74 "2009-02-09T00:54:33Z")
Red flags at sunset Auntie Rosa’s in town A visit from my best friend And my favourite - mouse smuggling! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/75 "2009-02-09T03:42:49Z")
Aunt Flo is from Redlands, right? I had a g/f who called tampons/pads ‘accommodations’. She would excuse herself and say, ‘I have to accommodate.’ ---
**Author:** ![Millit\_the\_Frail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@Millit\_the\_Frail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Millit_the_Frail)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/76 "2009-02-09T05:00:03Z")
> [@olivesmarch4th](#): > > The euphemism we use the most is the Onion one, It’s that ‘‘time of the month’’ where I’m ‘‘not at my best’’ because my ‘‘vagina is bleeding.’’ Ha! My husband and I say that too. When I’m in a disgusting mood, I think of “Trolling for Vampires,” which I could’ve sworn was an Onion euphemism, but it wasn’t there. Don’t know where I got it, then… ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/77 "2009-02-09T16:02:06Z")
My daughter and I complain about “bleeding to death”. My husband actually has an Aunt Flo, and didn’t understand why that made me giggle. I’m really surprised at the early starters here, too! I was a very late bloomer and didn’t start until just after I turned fifteen. In fact, I knew all about it, thanks to Judy Blume, and I couldn’t wait for it to come. All my friends had started around age twelve, so eventually I decided there was something wrong with me. I believed this so strongly that by the time it actually came, I panicked and thought I needed a doctor, just like any kid who’d never even heard of it. ---
**Author:** ![Solfy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Solfy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Solfy)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/78 "2009-02-09T16:02:52Z")
As a young teen, the very thought of having to mention feminine products in front of my father or brother made me want to crawl off into a corner and die. My mom would ask me if I needed any “stuff” when she was going to the store. Two kids and almost 20 years later, I’ll tell my husband that there’s a “scheduled equipment outage” or that I’m “smoking cotton cigars.” But those are both probably less appropriate for the younger set (seeing as how the equipment is hopefully still in idle). I had a friend in college who named her period George. She’d say, “George is back in town.” That one always struck me as odd/amusing. ---
**Author:** ![I\_Am\_The\_Lorax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e19adc/32.png) [@I\_Am\_The\_Lorax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Am_The_Lorax)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/79 "2009-02-09T16:32:18Z")
\*\*Solfy,\*\*your college friend could be my sister. “George is in town” is what we’d say in mixed company. Otherwise, “My fuckin’ cunt is bleeding” ---
**Author:** ![Sigmagirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c89c15/32.png) [@Sigmagirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sigmagirl)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2009, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms-for-menstruation/484786/80 "2009-02-09T17:59:02Z")
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