# Euphemisms **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 18, 2000, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024 "2000-02-18T00:26:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/1 "2000-02-18T00:26:00Z")
In the spirit of the **redundancies** thread. Some of our favority (or possibly most hated) euphemisms: Junk mail = Direct marketing correspondence Truck stop = Travel plaza Manicurist = Nail technician Drought = Water defecit situation I used to have a whole list of these from George Carlin, who is well known for being disgusted by ridiculous PC phrases. I’ll have lots more to add if I can come up with it. * * * Recent polls revealed that some people have never been polled, until recently. ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/2 "2000-02-18T01:20:00Z")
rerun = “encore presentation” more to come… ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/3 "2000-02-18T01:31:00Z")
Dead = Passed Away Janitor = Environmental Service Technician Ugly = Nice (heheh, not really a euphemism, but you know what I mean.) ---
**Author:** ![lovelee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/439d5e/32.png) [@lovelee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lovelee)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/4 "2000-02-18T03:05:00Z")
No, silly… Ugly=Wonderful personality. _promptly dons asbestos underwear_ ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/5 "2000-02-18T03:13:00Z")
Ugly = “Aesthetically challenged”. ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/6 "2000-02-18T03:29:00Z")
taxes = “contributions” ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 3:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/7 "2000-02-18T03:39:00Z")
beggar/transient/bum = “homeless” * * * Friday night; drinkin’ the vino, padding the post count. ---
**Author:** ![WallyM7](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5e925/32.png) [@WallyM7](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WallyM7)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/8 "2000-02-18T03:59:00Z")
In real estate: Adorable = small Cute = Very small Cozy = Slightly bigger than a doghouse Close to amenities = Nearest store is 5 miles away Lots of potential = Rundown Recently renovated = In 1971 Fully landscaped = Has a lawn and a half dead tree. Great view = Overlooking the highway ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/9 "2000-02-18T04:30:00Z")
…in keeping with Wally’s theme: Handyman’s Special or Fixer Upper = Turned down for use as a crack house ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Vimes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e68b1a/32.png) [@Sam\_Vimes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Vimes)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/10 "2000-02-18T05:01:00Z")
Anything “pre-owned”. Any command starting off with, “for your convenience/safety”. ---
**Author:** ![TripleAnt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e19adc/32.png) [@TripleAnt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TripleAnt)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/11 "2000-02-18T05:13:00Z")
You are right, Carlin has a huge list of them. Fingerprinting: digital imaging Nightclub: party space Room Service: private dining Uniforms: career apparel Junkies: the user population Cardboard Box: makeshift home * * * “I have a lot of good ideas, problem is most of them suck.” -George Carlin ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2000, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/12 "2000-02-18T05:14:00Z")
Oh, oh, oh: “for _your_ protection, we are videotaping the premises.” Yeah, right. They’re trying to catch your ass. ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2000, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/13 "2000-02-19T23:21:00Z")
Coffee mug = liquid-caffeine delivery system ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2000, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/14 "2000-02-19T23:43:00Z")
In tribute to a blurb from TNT, when they decided to only show the first season of Crusade: “A Special limited series” * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2000, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/15 "2000-02-19T23:44:00Z")
We’ve got manny of 'em right here – idiot - Bj0rn slut - Heatherlee ironic - UncleBeer omnipotent - Cecil flirtatious - kellibelli smart - Doctor Jackson assinine - valenta8 troll - Brithael and of course; : ) - Death Wish * * * “Though I hate 'em, I’ll defend to my death your right to use smilies.” Forward deployed until 18AUG00 ---
**Author:** ![lvick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d07c76/32.png) [@lvick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lvick)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2000, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/16 "2000-02-20T17:13:00Z")
Fighter jet: airborn weapons delivery platform, I am not making this up ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2000, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/17 "2000-02-20T17:32:00Z")
sugar= “concentrated cane juice” first week not billed of minimum one-month subscription= “Free Porn!” ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2000, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/18 "2000-02-20T20:16:00Z")
Troll = coherent-post challenged ? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Spoke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@Spoke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoke)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2000, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/19 "2000-02-20T23:07:00Z")
This is sort of related. I was pretty amused with what happened to the names of breakfast cereals a few years back, as Kellogg’s, Post, and the gang desperately tried to expunge the dreaded word “sugar”: Sugar Pops --\> Corn Pops Sugar Smacks --\> Honey Smacks Sugar Frosted Flakes --\> Frosted Flakes ---
**Author:** ![thirdwarning](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecccb3/32.png) [@thirdwarning](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thirdwarning)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2000, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024/20 "2000-02-21T06:13:00Z")
How about: Negative patient outcome–(he died) Engaging the enemy on all sides–(we’re surrounded) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euphemisms/14024.md?page=2)