# Euty, you ass!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [February 20, 2003, 1:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253 "2003-02-20T01:39:38Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@samarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samarm)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/21 "2003-02-20T03:11:51Z")
Tonight on FOX:
**World’s scariest moderators!**
---
### Author:  [@Hank\_Fescue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hank_Fescue)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/22 "2003-02-20T03:12:08Z")
You are being a complete ass. You know you are. Don’t give that crap from up on your high moderators horse. Errr… oooops. Wrong Mod.
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### Author:  [@Buck\_The\_Diver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Buck_The_Diver)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/23 "2003-02-20T03:15:57Z")
Followed by:
**WHEN MODS GET BORED II: ATTACK OF THE DOUBLE POST!**
Next on FOX!
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### Author:  [@David\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/David_B)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/24 "2003-02-20T03:41:00Z")
Euty: I have just received an official memo from the Moderator Pit Thread Judging Board. They have ruled that a Pit thread started BY the moderator in question does not count towards your total in the Pit Thread Race.
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.
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### Author:  [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/25 "2003-02-20T03:47:02Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*To quoth myself \*
> \*\*Sheesh. . . “warmongrel” . . . \*\*
Sheesh, I figured someone would at least point my fault in that it’s “warmonger” versus “warmongrel”.
Tripler
Hopelessly awaiting a pit thread.
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### Author:  [@december](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/december)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/26 "2003-02-20T03:47:58Z")
There once was a poster named **Eutychus** ,
He got bored and became a sad, moody cuss.
…In a jealousy fit
…Threw himself in the Pit,
We will miss such a nice therapeutic cuss.
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### Author:  [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/27 "2003-02-20T04:14:50Z")
{Squints} Who are you, again?
Newsflash: Nice Guy Finishes Last in Hate Race
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### Author:  [@CadburyAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CadburyAngel)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/28 "2003-02-20T05:14:13Z")
If it helps at all, I ran across a “Eutychus” in some of the readings on Rome that I’ve been doing, and it confused the crap out of me. (I forgot that you could time-travel.) I was more briefly disoriented than deeply enraged, but now I’ve had a more or less negative emotion associated with your name, which must count for something in this thread.
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### Author:  [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/29 "2003-02-20T05:17:17Z")
When do we get to hit him?
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### Author:  [@Q.E.D](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Q.E.D)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/30 "2003-02-20T05:36:40Z")
[Mr. T] I [pitted](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=164339) the fool! [/Mr.T]
😃
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### Author:  [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 5:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/31 "2003-02-20T05:38:42Z")
**Euty** , you asshat-you’re making the hamsters run over time because you’re BORED!!!
Sheesh, you mods are so spoiled!
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### Author:  [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/32 "2003-02-20T06:04:21Z")
**Euty** , you absolutely _suck_ at being an irritant.
Once, _once_, I gleefully found some trivial thing to bitch you out about, (imbedded midi on your webpage,) and you took all the fun out of it by shrugging and and saying “I’ve been meaning to get around to removing that,” and then actually taking it out.
Worse yet, its removal, in concert with other incidentals on the page:
> [@](#):
>
> The background music is a version of the Sailor’s Hornpipe as arranged by Mike Oldfield.
and
> [@](#):
>
> In Cyberspace, no one can hear you scratch your head.
…conspire to give your bland, nice-guy’s-webpage an undeserved appearance of wicked irony. Jeez, that pisses me off.
One day, everyone will realize the amount of envy and self-loathing which your inconsiderate cultivation of a fine mind & beautiful soul has sowed in the world, and the truth will out. So there.
You Bastid.
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### Author:  [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/33 "2003-02-20T06:08:53Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Sorry, I was just feeling jealous about everyone else’s Pit threads.
Well fer fuck’s sake. Even I know you don’t start a Pit thread by apologizing for it! You wanna be an ass, just **be an ass!** Let your Inner Ass run free! You’ll be glad you did!
Ya wanker.
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### Author:  [@Klaatu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Klaatu)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/34 "2003-02-20T06:24:15Z")
There once was a mod named **Euty**
Who was bummed from lack of good booty
He posted a rant
Was told to get bent
And now he will probly be snooty.
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### Author:  [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/35 "2003-02-20T06:33:21Z")
You stinkin’ **[burner](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=164125)**!
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### Author:  [@GusNSpot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GusNSpot)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/36 "2003-02-20T06:34:54Z")
[Dad’s voice]
“PATRICK, you get in here this minute!!”
[/Dad’s voice]
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### Author:  [@3trew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/3trew)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/37 "2003-02-20T06:35:17Z")
I think the posters above have a point, **Eutychus**. If you really, really want to have yourself pitted, you need a better OP than that.
You’re a moderator. When someone is being objectionable, they get reported to you.
Use those resources. Make a list of the top five people who’ve not quite been banned yet and have them help you with your post.
If you’re lucky, it’ll degenerate into a flame war. If you’re not, it’ll just go away. If you’re unlucky, it’ll wind up like the “Colin Powell’s Not Black” thread and become a chance for random dopers to riff off one another with very funny results. It’s even possible that curling will be referenced.
I know, I’m a newbie and no expert, not having been pitted yet myself, but I think I have a solid grasp of the basics and some day I’ll make it.
I’ll give you a half point, though, for getting the limericks started.
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### Author:  [@samarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samarm)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/38 "2003-02-20T06:39:32Z")
…but minus 2 points for starting your pit thread with the word “Sorry”!
Come on man, you should have started it with “Fuck all of you!” or something! You’re just too nice!
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/39 "2003-02-20T14:10:04Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Eutychus \*
> **Euty, you ass!**
3 monkeys. 2 days.
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### Author:  [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)
#### Post date: [February 20, 2003, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/euty-you-ass/156253/40 "2003-02-20T14:12:01Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by beagledave \*
> \*\*Could somebody lend this fool a wife to brag about his shagging abilities and defend him from the naysayers? \*\*
Nah then the whiners will show up too.
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